The Tropes Are Hungry II

do yourself a favor and read “Oh God, Not Again!” by Sarah1281

it is a harry potter fanfic from like 2009, 160k words, 50 chapters

basically, adult Harry accidentally goes back in time and wakes up on his 11th birthday again, but with all his memories of the future intact

(the way he travels back makes no sense whatsoever but it doesn’t really matter)

harry decides upon 3 goals:

fuck up as much shit as possible

make a shitload of money

save some lives or whatever

it is

H I L A R I O U S

his go-to explanation for how he knows what’s going to happen?

he has a psychic scar

(hermione is SO PISSED about this)

(neville’s like “either he’s psychic, or he’s the greatest conman alive”)

everyone just sort of assumes harry’s insane and he doesn’t do much to dispute this

harry also decides to make it his mission in life to LOSE the house cup every year

“snape is my sole ally”

he also goes out of his way to befriend neville, ginny, and luna earlier this time, so they’re part of the gang throughout and it’s great

even draco is a friend!

(kind of)

(when harry’s not spreading a rumor that draco’s the lovechild of narcissa and snape, anyway)

harry’s motivation for everything he does in this story is basically, “oh, this will be hilarious”

either that or, “it’s probably a tax deductible”

because the way lockhart is written in this story is also amazing and harry ends up teaming up with him to merchandise The Boy Who Lived so he can have cash to burn

(so he gets a LOT of shit done via bribes)

it gets to the point where harry is able to convince everyone that he’s not the heir of slytherin…. because if he was, he’d have found a way to make money off of it

and everyone’s like “yeah ok that checks out”

in this timeline, neville’s boggart isn’t snape…. it’s harry as the minister of magic

harry also decides to make sure cedric lives by quizzing him constantly on what to do if he ends up in a graveyard

harry: by the way, that reminds me – cedric. graveyard.

cedric, not even really listening: run like hell.

the sheer magnitude to which harry does not give a fuck in this timeline is truly awe-inspiring

he mouths off to everyone, and i mean everyone. lockhart, snape, the dursleys, malfoy, friggin’ voldemort

everyone is like “what… what the fuck, harry”

(though by the end of first year it’s more like “… *deep sigh* … fine.

snape is so angry

it’s fucking hysterical and just about everyone ends up better off

here’s the link

thank me later

The tropes are hungry II

Part I is here

The fanfiction witch’s pantry 

Inspired by this wonderful post [x] by @mysunfreckle

(click and zoom in to be able to read the labels)

Ship Sizes

Supercarrier: fandom flagship.  Everybody and their dog ships it.  The fandom is glutted with artwork and fic.  You cannot escape this ship.

Dreadnought: massively popular.  Nearly everybody ships it.  You can, with dedication, in theory, reach the end of the AO3 archive for the ship’s tag, but it’ll take a long time.

Cruiser: pretty popular ship.  Not everyone ships it, but everyone knows about it.  Has a good amount of fic/art, and probably multiple ask blogs.

Frigate: just plain popular.  Feels like it could use more fanworks.  New people to the fandom might not know about it, but they’ll stumble across it sooner rather than later.

Gunboat: bit of a rarepair.  It might have an ask blog or two.  A couple big name fans ship it.  Probably only takes a few weeks to get through the entire AO3 backlog, and one new fic gets added during that time.

Tugboat: rarepair.  Almost never seen except as a side pairing to a more popular ship.  You can usually get through everything on AO3 in a matter of days.  You’ve forgotten what it is to be picky about what you read.

Rowboat: less than a dozen people ship it.  You all know each other.  You exist in an endless cycle of the same five people desperately producing art and fic and one person who constantly contributes headcanons.

Canoe: you are one of maybe three people who ship it, and there’s a not-insignificant chance you’ve never encountered those other two hypothetical shippers.  You spend your days paddling furiously in hopes of keeping the ship afloat, dreaming of the day you upgrade to a rowboat so you can finally rest.

I've been exposed...

Me: *gives advice to everyone about everything, is the mom friend, is a level-headed, mature and responsible young adult* all that matters is your own mental and physical health, look after yourself it's important

Also me: *waking up at 3am, I've slept for 3 hours, I'm eating junk food and leftover takeout and reading fanfiction until the time comes where I can no longer hide from my one true enemy the sun*

Fanfiction is becoming people’s primary form of entertainment right now because most media right now is so cheap, bland, recycled, and sponsored by people who love money more than the source material. Fanfiction is written for free by people who genuinely love what they’re writing about. That’s why it’s better. That’s why it’s more satisfying. Fanfiction is a home-cooked meal made for yourself and for your friends. Media today is junky fast food spoiled by too much grease and the knowledge that the people producing it are being criminally mistreated and underpaid. 

The duality of man

Parts 1 and 2

OUR INSTAGRAM

moodboard by @gender-snatched

A Sign of Good Things

Fandom: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling

Chapters: 1/1

Word Count:  32,475

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Relationships: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter

Characters: Harry Potter, Draco Malfoy, Luna Lovegood, Narcissa Black Malfoy, Andromeda Black Tonks, James Sirius Potter, Albus Severus Potter, Lily Luna Potter, Teddy Lupin, Ginny Weasley, Hermione Granger, The Weasleys

Additional Tags: Post-Hogwarts, HP: EWE, Romance, Family, Kids, Fluff

Summary:

A decade ago Draco left England needing a change. Now he's back and a chance meeting with a trio of children leads to his life taking an unexpected turn. Friendships are formed, reconciliations made and all in all, he discovers what it is to be part of a family. 

AO3

FFN

“Once, I held on tighter instead of letting go. And at the time I thought that was the right thing to do. But the truth is, it doesn’t matter how tightly you hold on, because what is meant for you will always be yours. You shouldn’t have to fight for what is truly yours. So if some wants to go - please just let them go.”