The Thing Is, Jegulus Makes Perfect Sense To Me Genuinely. And I Understand The Gripes That People Have

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my roman empire is that i will never be able to experience a friendship as deep as the marauders had

nothing on my mind except how during their relationship all james was thinking about was how happy he is to just be with Regulus and then in Regulus' POV he's just constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop and convincing himself he needs to leave.

shit like this is why i'm so devastated by how they ended like. james loved regulus so softly so dearly so purely and regulus loved him back just as much and it still wasn't enough it just wasn't enough to overcome everything else that was going on

James wants to be wrapped up in this boy. This love. He wants to never be able to wash it off his skin. Or out of his mouth. He hopes Regulus has left marks. Hopes he can see them in the morning. He’ll wear them proudly—showing the day how they love in the dark.

rewatching gof bc i watched poa in theatres yesterday and am watching ootp in theatres tomorrow. and im getting to the scene where harry goes into the pensieve and goes to the court room. and like i’ve seen this scene many times but. “mr rosier is dead” and it’s like. it’s hitting me bc oh he died in the ministry of magic. the attack on the ministry. where regulus got injured and james went to see him and…like i forget that canon compliant fics take place in canon and that harry potter is canon…therefore these events take place after the fanon canon compliant events. and that regulus black and james potter were in love in this fanon canon universe. and that regulus black was present when evan rosier died and his death being referenced in gof is a reference to the attack on the ministry in choices which is not canon but could exist in canon because choices is canon compliant. and jegulus is real not because jkr wrote them into the canon hp books, but because the magical wizarding universe itself that exists itself is thing and they existed in that universe in choices. so they exist in hp movies too…technically

regulus's lifeforce using his final moments to try and hash things out with his brother breaks my heart so much. he really loved him the best way he could, it was always sirius for him. the first person he loved, and first person he lost and i stand by the fact that it was his most defining relationship. like yes, his relationship with james was so important and impacted him in so many ways but sirius shaped him yk? his final moments may have been spent thinking of james but it was sirius that his soul went to first. he always loved him even when he wasn't strong enough. one of my favourite moments is after the prank he took the time to try and get james to understand (?) sirius and the way he thinks even when he gets nothing out of it. the fact that they never fixed things will always be the greatest tragedy. because above all else that would've been redemption for him, to him.

no thoughts, just... thinking about the way Ekko looks at Powder...

he wanted so badly to make things right, to TRY, to do the right fucking thing and he was so close. so close yet so far. it physically hurts

I think the saddest thing about choices is regulus’ death but mostly the part when he tried. He tried to appareate, he tried to sommon broom, he tried to get out, he really fucking tried and that is maybe what is james talking about when he’s talking to lily. I think I see myself in regulus, trying so hard yet failing

finished choices and i genuinely feel like i've just served on the front lines of a battle and barely made it out alive holy shit. fic so devastating i was crying for hours dry heaving and retching like i genuinely LOOKED sick. so devastating it had me crying in public (which I haven't been able to do for years) So heartbreaking It feels like it carved out a piece of me.

the epilogue of choices paralleling the end of the song of achilles is so magical to me. two souls finding their way back together in the next life because this one wasn't ready for them. all the ways patrochilles parallels jegulus in choices is my favourite in general but the ending SPECIFICALLY. Knowing they're together out there is so important to me

grieving regulus black harder than i've ever grieved any family death or friendship breakup.