Can We Take A Moment To Think About The Younger Trans Men And Mascs On Tumblr Right Now?

Can we take a moment to think about the younger trans men and mascs on tumblr right now?

I was a teenager when ace and transmed discourses were at their peaks, and I can’t exaggerate how badly it affected me then.

Now trans men are the latest target, and I’m terrified for trans kids.

It’s easy to say “intracommunity discourse is an online problem! Go talk to queer people irl!”, but people forget that so many kids and teenagers do not have safe or reliable access to IRL LGBT+ communities and support groups. For many, online spaces are the only option.

We need to make sure the younger members of our community are being heard, and block out the hateful voices with messages of support and encouragement. Things are bad enough for trans people right now, and it's easy to forget that trans minors are often the ones suffering the most.

To any younger trans men or transmasculine people reading this:

The hate you are experiencing isn’t normal, it hasn’t always been like this, and it won’t always be this way. It is bleeding out from a small, miserable group of self-absorbed jerks.

Don’t feel obligated to call them out, don’t feel like you have to interact with these people. Please don’t doomscroll through discourse tags; it will make you feel like everyone is out to get you.

If you want to speak up for your community, that’s fine, but please take a break if you feel like your mental health is worsening. Block anybody who so much as breathes rudely in your direction.

You’re just as trans as the rest of us. You are welcome here.

Oh, and if you want to seek out external resources and groups, PFLAG helped me a lot when I was younger. It is an American-based organization, however, so if anyone has recommendations for those living outside of the US, please let me know in the reblogs!

More Posts from Nixisverytired and Others

3 weeks ago

When someone makes transition all about passing. Ok, if your goal is passability, good for you but don't force it on other people. I hear it all the time: "What is trasition fpr if not passing? What is the point?" Or "If you don't want to pass you aren't trans" True trans liberation can only be achieved when we stop attributing gender and sex to external characteristics, this involves dismantling the concept of passability. Even if "passing" was something easy that any binary trans person could achieve, what about us, nonbinary? How do we externally communicate we are polygender, ambonec, agender, maverique?

this is exorsexism.

3 months ago

Reblog daily for health and prosperity

Reblog Daily For Health And Prosperity
1 month ago

I wasn't able to reply this in another post, for god knows what reason, but anyway I want to have it as a separate post. So.

I'm ftm, I'm from the global south, etc. I know what the transmasc struggles are - you will find I lived through them, I keep living through them. I was sent to offbrand conversion therapy, got told that clearly I'm just a confused girl who looks too much like a child and so that's why I'm identifying as a man (?). I am not going to be talking about all that. That's the deep lore.

What I am going to be talking about is how fucking meaningless the arguments against transandrophobia theory keep getting on this website. I cannot keep logging on and seeing people argue semantics (while not understanding a single thing they're saying) to define our experiences out of existence. I cannot keep logging on and seeing fucking USAmericans, because it's always one of y'all, who live in a sort of comfort I will never, ever get to experience or even see, try to tell me that somehow I have more power than any of them, because of how a fucking word is structured.

You are not arguing in good faith and I will not treat you like you are.

3 months ago

Today was scary but raising 3k with my sister and being with my girlfriend filled me with hope. I love being transgender and I'll never stop.


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3 weeks ago

to transcend both male and female is to be, and I thought this was obvious, transgender. everyone I've seen pushing against nonbinary inclusion in the trans community has used transphobic narratives to make their point. of course, no one should force all nonbinary people to identify with the word trans specifically (or binary people for that matter), but we all need to understand that that's what being nonbinary fundamentally is.

when laws are passed against nonbinary people, it's because they're trans. when they're disrespected for being nonbinary, it's for being transgender. when there's no space for them in society besides cringe compilations and jokes, that's happening to them because they are trans people. when people refuse to believe that their gender is nonbinary, it's because they are a part of the transgender community. the people doing these things to them are transphobic and they see nonbinary people as super [t slur]s. they are threatened by even the mere suggestion that there's more than 2 options because all forms of transness threaten cissexism and heteronormativity, even the entire concept of gender. you could say that they are phobic, even. ya know, of the transition. from binary to nonbinary.

if another trans person tells you that you don't count, that what you go through is disqualified just because you're nonbinary, it's because they're suffering from a severe case of internalized transphobia (as well as ignorance of trans history, ideology, gender theory, and purpose). they need too much help themselves to stand by you, do not engage with them. you are not taking from the community by increasing the demand for rights, support, and resources, that's not how supply and demand works. there is no limit to how many types of people can receive kindness because respect for other people is a renewable resource. in fact, if more people ask for more rights and respect and put effort into facilitating that acceptance for others, it's way more likely to increase the level of joy in the world. it's like a collective pursuit of happiness, and everyone will be better off working together.

also, if you're wondering how a person, even a binary one, who would usually be considered trans could not identify as trans (in a non-transphobic way), all you have to do is go "lol no" and boom. not trans. just think "I'm transgender to YOU" and "am I transgender? no, it's the cis people who are trans, identifying as made-up genders and shit," and there you go. welcome to cis manhood, womanhood, and/or nonbinaryhood. as Ms. Frizzle would say, "take chances, make mistakes, get messy!" it is the "do what you want the rules are fake and baseless anyway" community after all


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1 month ago

"trans women HATE trans men. they're oppressing you bc of their socialization" <- this is a manipulation tactic by terfs to isolate you from the broader trans community to more easily groom you into detransitioning (and possibly to groom you sexually too tbh). call it out for what it is

3 months ago
This Satire Article Resonated With Me So Much

This satire article resonated with me so much

1 month ago

Trans people are not inherently intersex.

Medical transition does not turn a perisex person intersex.

Your brain is not a sex trait, you do not have an "intersex brain", you are not "neurologically intersex" because you experience gender dysphoria.

If you believe any of this you are being intersexist.

Do you have an observable (including through testing or otherwise) genetic/natal variation in the way your sex traits developed? If the answer is NO, you are NOT INTERSEX. You are perisex.

Perisex refers to anyone who is not intersex, elaborated, does not have a natal variation in their sex traits. This term does not invalidate your transition. It refers to a bodily starting point and it's only purpose is to differentiate you from those with a different bodily starting point. If you were born in Detroit you can't say you were born in Baltimore because you live in Baltimore now. That's not how this works.

Why is this important? Because the only other terms for our bodily differences are the pathologizing disorders & syndromes we are diagnosed with. I am not a person with a DSD, I am intersex goddammit. If that word is watered down, then I'll be forced to refer to myself as disordered if I want to talk about how my body and my issues are different from yours, exactly like what cisnormative society wants me to do. Congratulations for helping reify intersexist pathologization that gets us killed! How #inclusionist of you!

You can be sex variant as a perisex person through transition, but you cannot "become intersex", please stop saying fucking this. There are more of you than there are us. You are speaking over us. We are already invisible and you are NOT helping.


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3 weeks ago
Yep! That's Because It's Not An Actual Argument Or Discussion. It's People Trying To Silence Trans Men

Yep! That's because it's not an actual argument or discussion. It's people trying to silence trans men and anyone who defends them.

From what I've seen, some of these people also believe that trans men are simultaneously "late transition, indistinguishable from cis men and immune to misogyny" and "Basically cis girls with D-Cups, hiding behind their femininity, and a week from detransitioning into a terf" There's so many contradictions in anti-transmasc viewpoints, it's a wonder that anyone falls for them. It's all disgustingly misogynistic and transphobic, and reeks of truscum and terf logic. I'll say what I always say, don't argue with them. Just block and move on. Most trans people ain't like that.


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1 month ago

I am not a big Tumblr poster. Ok? I'm an observer in all aspects. A lurker, if you will. I don't reblog stuff. I barely even like things. I only follow people sometimes.

But recently I've been scrolling through the 'transandrophobia' tag a lot more than I used to. recently I've seen posts that send me into a train of thought that's like. "People really think like this?" And it's more tiring than I realize sometimes. So I'm putting my thoughts into this post.

I've recently watched masculine trans people and queer people of all kinds getting the short end of the stick. I watch people put others down based on their masculinity, and I think- if this is such a big issue when done to femininity, why in the world would you think it's acceptable to flip it around? Feminism has never been about saying that women are better. It's never been about hating men. It's been about uplifting women so that they'll be seen as equals, and breaking both men and women out of patriarchal mindsets. It's about uniting over the fact that no group of people is better than another.

Trans men and enbies and mascs do not have whatever perceived systemic privilege you think they do. Trans people in general will only ever have conditional privilege in specific situations, if that. Society only praises performative masculinity- the kind that fits into their neat little boxes of 'should' and 'shouldn't'. Masculine queer people have never fit into those stupid little boxes. Trans men. Mascs. Butches.

I'm tired of this. Tired of the 'femininity good masculinity bad' talk. You're not children. Grow up and learn some nuance. Trans men are whiny and annoying to you because they've never had the privilege of being anything other than invisible. Constantly erased and brushed off so when they start getting angry you see it as an attack because you haven't cared to see them before. You haven't cared to see them when they were scared. You haven't cared to see them when they were just begging to be seen. You haven't cared to see them as anything other than traitors or thieves or anything because until it's not about you anymore, you don't give a fuck. You only look at them when you're personally slighted by whatever they have to say.

What does it cost to have empathy for other's lived experiences? Nothing. When a group of people is telling you what they've consistently and repeatedly been through, you listen to them. You don't shut them down because of an immutable trait. You don't shut them down because you've never seen it happen. You don't shut them down because they're not your idea of someone who's oppressed. That's not how this works. People are angry for a REASON. Masculine queer people have every right to be angry. we've been pushed aside and had statistics ignored and been told that other people's oppression is more important than ours simply for what? the sin of masculinity?

Now, above all, trans people should be united. Instead of fussing over whatever sort of strawmen and caricatures you have in your head, we should just be listening to each other. we should be able to listen to other's lives and traumas and pains without throwing a fit over words or theories. Having words to describe oppression is important. Being able to label your pain is important. But none of that matters more than what's happening to people in their real lives. the people who are dying. The people who are being raped and silenced and shunned out of public spaces and even their own homes. No words will ever matter more than the people who are actively hurting due to your refusal to even look in their direction.

if you want to talk about this, be my guest. Ask me questions. Tell me I'm wrong. Whatever. I just have a need for this to be known above all else. I don't care what people on the internet think of what I have to say. This site is a fuckin cesspool. so's every other corner of the internet.

Thanks for reading.


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nixisverytired - Trans Unity > Trans Discourse
Trans Unity > Trans Discourse

Nix, They/Them, Queer, 20s Sporadically active.Do not gender me.

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