I Made My First Attempt At A Smoothie Today. It Had Too Much Ice And Wouldn't Flow. The Only Solution

As I drove into work mostly still asleep, I had a sudden, horrifying sensation I left my light saber at home. The awake half of my brain took a minute to process how ridiculous the notion was I: Have a real light saber; would need said light saber for work. Sleeping only two-three hours a night is not a good way to live.

http://just-another-psych0tic.tumblr.com/

Someone needs to write a story about the Headless Horseman as an undead superhero who always forgets he's missing his head. He'll keep trying to head butt people or whistle for his horse, only to remember that he doesn't have a head. It'd start off with him writing a book about the inconvenience of being headless and follow his misadventures on his quest to find out where it went. All the while, he's battling people who want to take over the world or steal his head. He'll have great, heroic monologues in sign language that only get translated when someone else or the villain happen to know sign language. He also has to hide from everyday people because of the stigma created by the events in the Legend of Sleepy Hollow, which he swears (in sign language) to the authorities are terribly misinterpreted. People try to re-kill him, exorcise him, and capture him, etc. Demons and other undead try to take him back to the underworld. Aliens and super villains keep trying to destroy the planet. All he wants is to find his head and be able to enjoy a beer or two at the bar down the street from his apartment.

Has anyone else ever noticed in horror movies and shows when the good guy walks into their house and a window is open they clearly didn't open earlier all they do is close it with a look of, "That's weird, I don't remember opening that window." Bitch! It's your damn house! If you didn't open the window, something else damn did! At least pretend you know something is wrong.

My favorite episode of SpongeBob was on today at my medical building. I didn't get to watch it because I had to be an adult for all the Boots in the room who were intently staring directly ahead despite no orders to do so. But, one day they will realize it's okay to be more than a statue in public settings.

Well…. This is awkward….

How many hats could the Sorting Hat sort, if the Sorting Hat could sort hats?

How does one get a membership to this gym?

Knight at the Gym. The dude in the jousting armor cracks me up every time. LOLOL

Someone asked me if I believed in God. I asked them what kind of god would inflict me on their world.

Weather, if you could not do the whole downpour while sunny thing, that'd be great.