All Hail.

If we as a fandom are going to yap endlessly about Chuuya, can we at least acknowledge the fact that when this man uses corruption he moves around like a literal cryptid goblin thing?

Why he jump like that?

What are you, a skinwalker?

It’s worse in the manga y’all.

Yea no, this is spooky behavior.

I never get when people say Soukoku are doomed by the narrative. Like it makes sense in Beast but regular old bsd Soukoku?

The narrative wishes it could doom those idiots but they slot back into place the moment they see each other like no time has passed at all.

If anything the narrative is doomed by them.

Hey, you are not an embarrassment for not knowing how to do certain household chores/basic self-care. They do not come naturally to us. A lot of it takes practice! Maybe you had a neglectful guardian. Maybe you had one that was very coddling and never thought to teach you. Maybe you haven't lived in a place where these things were available to you or needed. Doesn't matter. It's okay to not know and far more common than you might realise.

That said, this website provides very simple instructions on how to do everyday tasks such as making your bed, using a washing machine, cooking different foods, washing dishes, taking a shower, etc. All you have to do is use the search bar to find the task you're struggling with, and it'll come up with what you need + other related how-to's:)

If you're having trouble navigating it, let me provide you with some examples:

How to clean dishes by hand

How to make your bed (with visual demonstrations of each step!)

How to fold clothes (with visual demonstrations of each step!)

How to take a shower & dry yourself off (also provides ways to shave beards, armpits, legs and genitals)

How to shave legs, armpits, beards, pubic areas, etc. (a more in-depth guide)

How to mop the floor

How to sweep the floor

How to swallow pills

How to make small talk

How to make eye contact in different situations (or how to avoid it while still looking natural)

It's also perfectly okay if these don't help or aren't appealing to you. Unfortunately, nothing helps everyone.

Teen skk this teen skk that. How about dazais deep depressive episodes where he didn’t brush his teeth or his hair or shower and after a few days of not seeing him around work chuuya would go to his container, grab him and wash him like a dog. Wet black cat. Dazai is just annoyed. Chuuya lets him sleep at his place during the bad parts of the episode “so he doesn’t skip work leaving all the paperwork for him” but really it’s because he doesn’t like thinking about dazai alone in that cold container. Even the most annoying person on earth should have more than a mattress and four metal walls, I guess. So chuuya has him stay over during those days. Is it such a hassle really to make a little more food when cooking dinner? Both of them have always had trouble sleeping so might as well spend the night together watching shitty sitcoms or talking shit about coworkers or setting up pranks for mori instead of looking at the ceiling all night. In this essay I will.

I bet he’d blame it on Chuuya’s ability too, knowing full damn well Chuuya cant even use his ability when he’s holding him.

Headcanon that no matter how hard he tries Dazai cannot for the life of him pick up Chuuya

He is simply too twig

Chuuya however, can pick up Dazai with ease and takes it to his full advantage

Thinking about Tachihara deciding to stay with the Mafia after everything's over.

Thinking about the government refusing to give him his next monthly surgery since he's no longer a Hunting Dog.

Thinking about him accepting and coming to terms with the fact that he's going to die, and even saying his goodbyes to his friends in the mafia.

Thinking about Hirotsu, Gin, Higuchi, Kouyou, Chuuya, all refusing to let him die like this, and scrambling to find a way to save him.

Thinking about Chuuya and Kouyou threatening the hospitals to give him the surgeries, and Gin and Higuchi sneaking around to find something that could help.

And then it hits them. The solution, which now seems so obvious in hindsight.

Thinking about Chuuya on the phone with the Detective Agency, and of course it's Dazai who picks up the other end.

Thinking about him sitting in the office, head in his hands, as he hears Chuuya asking him to let Yosano go to the Mafia base for a while.

Thinking about Dazai, out of genuine concern for her, refusing to let her go back to the Port Mafia.

Thinking about Yosano being out the door before Dazai even puts the phone down, because it's Michizō Tachihara. This is Shunzen's younger brother, of course she has to help him.

Thinking about Yosano, when she arrives at the PM base, not having to hurt him even a little bit to use her ability, because he's already that far gone, that broken.

Thinking about her sitting by his side, wondering if when he wakes up he's going to hate her for using the same ability on him that killed his brother.

But when Tachihara wakes up, all he can say to the doctor is "thank you," because he genuinely means it. Because of Yosano's ability, he's healed completely. He has no commitment to the Hunting dogs now.

(If i end this with "he's free" is that cringe?)

"chuuyas not a good liar!" "chuuya is all brawn and no brain!" Bla bla bla

Chuuya at 15, probably illiterate, tricking the smartest person in the mafia about his knowledge of Arahbaki:

Chuuya at 22 tricking an equally smart man into thinking he's a vampire with some fake teeth and contacts:

working on this obscure meta post on how people criticise dazai's actions of violence more than that of other PM members (namely akutagawa and Chuuya) because of the relationship between the audience and the weapon of choice, and how dazais lack of a supernatural way to enforce violence makes him more likely to receive criticism. Anyways anyone thats interested lmk???

Doodles of this loser

Guys I think we all need a moment to appreciate how the characters spoke in the early BSD mangas.

Kunikida’s sass is unparalleled and I need you all to realize this.