i wish i could dissapear, remove myself from reality, become one with death.
do those feeling ever go away? will i always be like this? will i break one day and give in? should i even care about my future if i don't know how long i'll last?
sorry if this is too much i just feel like i'm so close to giving up.
(changed cuz i honestly hate my original response)
ermmm idk how to comfort ppl n all so im not rlly gonna talk about it... n im the worst person to get advice or anything whatsoever from... but ty for expressing ur thoughts to me through this ask of urs!! just know i appreciate u for still being here :3
(sorry idk im not positive myself so i cant give advice without it going "yeah u should do it")
thanks for tagging me :3 (this is instantly an obligation for me to rb)
but uhm ive reached peak loneliness n dk who to tag so idk
 A friend threatened me to repost so I will!
Basically, there r tons of fake asses on tumblr who just want comments and followers, so someone started this to see who's actually a good friend. Everyone I tag better repost (and tag other people and preferably threaten them in a creative way as well) bc I'm high on caffeine and newfound lesbianism and will resort to violence.
@ey-theys-was-coronas
@fangirlhehe
I would tag more people but they're the only ones I've really interacted with-
i love being a landmine girl!!
Don’t act like you’re the savior of all broken souls just because you typed a few kind words on Tumblr. The truth is, people don't owe you their recovery. You can't fix someone who doesn't want to be fixed, and pushing that agenda onto others only makes it worse. Recovery isn't a neat little package wrapped in advice and support posts—it’s messy, painful, and personal. So stop pretending you're the key to someone's healing just because you slapped a 'You matter' sticker on their feed. We can see you're trying to help, but some wounds aren't healed by hashtags and self-help quotes.
They say, "Mental health professionals care about you." But do they? Or are you merely an investment—an asset for the future? Whether you become a smoker, a substance abuser, or just another weary soul suffocating under the weight of existence, you remain a cog in the machine. They care because your suffering fuels an industry—economically, professionally. Not because you, as a person, matter.
School does not prepare you for a career; it conditions you for obedience. It molds you into a well-trained servant of expectation, rewarding compliance and punishing defiance. And yet, people believe the system is built for their well-being. No, darling, it is built for its own survival. Mental health professionals care that you are alive—but not that you are living. There is a difference.
If true care were the foundation of this system, why are those who need only a little effort to heal instead confined to sterile white rooms, left to unravel further? It is not about healing. It is about preservation—preserving the cycle, preserving the economy, preserving the illusion of sanity. They do not care if you lose your mind, so long as you do not lose your pulse.
Would they call me a 'hopeless case' if I were wrapped in wealth? No. They would call it "progress," even if nothing changed. Money has a way of turning despair into "resilience." And if they did abandon a rich patient as hopeless, well—either they had exhausted every possible cent from them, or the abyss inside was simply too vast to be monetized.
It is not about humanity. It is about perception. Who cares if an 11-year-old boy carves his pain into his skin? Who cares if a 17-year-old girl trades her body for the illusion of love? Who cares if a 7-year-old is tormented by a body that does not feel like their own? Who cares if a 36-year-old woman surrenders to her hallucinations because reality is too unbearable? Who cares if a 21-year-old man is drowning in visions so vivid they become indistinguishable from truth? Who cares if a 61-year-old woman clings to the ghost of her son, longing to follow him?
The list is endless. The suffering is endless. And yet, none of it matters—not unless it becomes a headline, a viral sensation, a story fit to be consumed and discarded by the masses. Only then does the world pretend to care.
So spare me the naive platitudes. "Mental health professionals care about you!" they say. No. Most care only about keeping you just functional enough to keep the system running. After all, a dead investment yields no returns.
But who cares? I am just a dreamer, adrift in a delusion—swaying in the direction the world has already chosen for me.
And for those of you who try to 'save' those here with savior complex:
♥︎ ‏‏‎ ₓₓ ‏‏‎‏‏‎ cute ‏‏‎ darkness ‏‏‎ ҅ ҅ ‏‏‎
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