it’s so crazy how you think you forget something but your body just remembers. had a trauma flashback yesterday abt my residential stay which i thought was weird and sure as shit, two years ago today i was shipped off to nashville.
i completely had no idea the exact date but apparently i never forgot.
Charity Euphrosyne
embodiment of joy,
true divine happiness,
radiant positivity,
You- who is the one i desperately aspire to be
beauty driven of only good will,
the eternal light.
Lady Euphrosyne I devote myself wholeheartedly to working towards my goal of positivity. May every workbook entry i have written/will write, every affirmation i read, and every kind act i commit be a testament to my will. I ask that you bless me on this journey and may guide me to become more like yourself in any way possible.
Blessed be, Kind Lady Euphrosyne.
i’m obviously sad how hard would it be to say you love me, or maybe try sending something to cheer me up? anything?
if Lord Apollon allowed song alone to heal, florence + the machine would have me considered sane
did i sit and stay,
like a good dog?
just how you asked?
my teeth bared,
so you’d mistake,
a grimace for a smile?
struggling to eat again, my therapy for this week had to be cancelled, and i feel like i should die. will i be sent back to the psych ward? probably not. do i want to be? kinda, i don’t feel good :/
‘Prowling Cats’ by Tim Southall
call me crazy but i think nightly hypnotherapy might actually be helping?? like i notice i just wake up sm more pleasant when i do it vs when i don’t?? do i actually go find a real hypnotherapist now??
i know it sounds stupid but praying in the quiet hours of the morning will always be one of my favorite things.
(god i never thought i would say that lol, but here we are,, life is weird but my gods are good and that is all that matters)
✩ 21 ✩ bpd, bipolar, & cptsd diagnosed ✩ helpol ✩ “Freedom is a length of rope. God wants you to hang yourself with it.”
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