Charity Euphrosyne
embodiment of joy,
true divine happiness,
radiant positivity,
You- who is the one i desperately aspire to be
beauty driven of only good will,
the eternal light.
Lady Euphrosyne I devote myself wholeheartedly to working towards my goal of positivity. May every workbook entry i have written/will write, every affirmation i read, and every kind act i commit be a testament to my will. I ask that you bless me on this journey and may guide me to become more like yourself in any way possible.
Blessed be, Kind Lady Euphrosyne.
i literally haven’t been up this late in years. this is insane. i have read so much fanfiction it’s ridiculous. I JUST WANT TO SLEEP PLS !!!!
literally just want to die so for once my brain could SHUT THE FUCK UP
her name is Laura. and i failed her and my bad brain forgot her name for so long. i’m so sorry Laura, i am.
sachiel i won’t chase you, i don’t want to scare you off. just know that i miss you, and i don’t know how to show it. i don’t want to come on to strong, to tell you i still love you just as much as that summer day where we became real soulmates.
i miss you. just know i think of you often, and fondly.
my self discovery journey is off to like the most insane start?? the universe has really decided that now is the time i finally get my shit together and be the person i only wished i could be. the coincidences are starting to feel more like fate. i want to talk to the Gods quickly on the subject and make sure that i am on my highest path,, but i think i’m really doing it guys. i just read the most empowering book about the universe and power of belief. i have the will, i just have to start to believe.
like the random compliments i’ve been giving are coming easier, enjoying my days and finding the good is still tough but i’m getting there, the last step is realizing that i am not what my father thinks i am- which will hopefully come faster than i could ever expect.
i’ve literally been lying to everyone and myself for years about how i hate kids, but my therapist told me that the fact that i as a 13 year old child wanting to stop the hypothetical that i have kids and fuck them up like my parents did to me is the most insane sign that i would be a good parent lol
she thinks i’d be a great parent :’) like idk little thirteen year old me is so secretly happy
the only way out will always be through.
something visceral about my mom sadly looking at me and quietly saying “do you think your dad would have done the same if it was you instead of your sister?”
sometimes the validation that i am and will always be the scapegoat child hurts
✩ 21 ✩ bpd, bipolar, & cptsd diagnosed ✩ helpol ✩ “Freedom is a length of rope. God wants you to hang yourself with it.”
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