TL;DR:

Pacing Through Sentence Length in Writing

You ever notice how a scene can feel like it’s dragging or speeding up based solely on the length of the sentences? Sentence length isn't just a technical detail—it’s a pacing tool. When used right, it can control the speed and tension of your story. Here’s how:

Short Sentences = Speed, Tension, Impact

Short, snappy sentences are like quick breaths, instantly pulling the reader’s attention. They mimic fast action, nervous energy, or urgent thoughts. They create momentum. Think of action scenes or emotional moments—often, less is more.

Example: The door slammed shut. His heart raced. She was gone.

In just three sentences, you feel the urgency, the chaos, and the emotional weight of the moment. It’s all about breaking up the narrative with these quick hits to keep the reader on edge.

Long Sentences = Build-up, Reflection, Depth

On the flip side, long sentences slow things down, adding complexity, reflection, or tension. They’re great for moments of introspection, world-building, or setting a scene in rich detail. These sentences create a flow, pulling the reader into the character’s headspace or the atmosphere of the moment.

Example: The wind howled through the narrow alley, carrying the distant sounds of a city that never seemed to sleep, never seemed to rest, and in that eternal hum, he wondered, not for the first time, if he would ever find peace here or if, like everyone else who tried to escape the shadows, he would simply become another part of the city’s endless noise.

Here, the length of the sentence mimics the complexity of the thoughts—heavy, reflective, almost hypnotic. It builds tension not with action but with an overwhelming feeling of being stuck or trapped in thought.

Combining Both = Dynamic Flow

The real magic happens when you mix short and long sentences. This creates a rhythm—suddenly, a break in the flow, a quick shock, and then back to a longer, more drawn-out moment. It reflects real life: quick bursts of action or emotion followed by moments of pause or thought.

Example: He reached for the door. It was locked. His heart pounded, each beat a reminder of how badly he needed this. There were no other options. There was no way out. The key could be anywhere. And he could not afford to wait any longer.

TL;DR:

Long sentences = build tension, create depth, set mood. Short sentences = ramp up urgency, show action, make an impact. Mastering this flow is a game-changer for pacing!

More Posts from Redibanni and Others

2 years ago

CANON 2x!!

Alberu: Please, I'm begging you go to a doctor.

Cale: I'm sorry is this 'OUR' stab wound? Stay out of it.


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tcf
3 months ago

Writing Description Notes:

Updated 9th September 2024 More writing tips, review tips & writing description notes

Facial Expressions

Masking Emotions

Smiles/Smirks/Grins

Eye Contact/Eye Movements

Blushing

Voice/Tone

Body Language/Idle Movement

Thoughts/Thinking/Focusing/Distracted

Silence

Memories

Happy/Content/Comforted

Love/Romance

Sadness/Crying/Hurt

Confidence/Determination/Hopeful

Surprised/Shocked

Guilt/Regret

Disgusted/Jealous

Uncertain/Doubtful/Worried

Anger/Rage

Laughter

Confused

Speechless/Tongue Tied

Fear/Terrified

Mental Pain

Physical Pain

Tired/Drowsy/Exhausted

Eating

Drinking

Warm/Hot


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2 years ago

Finally – a proper TCF timeline!

At long last, I made a semi-coherent tBoaH/TCF timeline for myself

Obviously there are many characters I didn't list, but at least the main players are all there. It's a bit confusing in places, but that's how it is when you deal with time travel, lol

(Sorry for the crude "___" form but apparently the Tab key doesn't work!! 😕)

Timeline POVs

___________________age_____year(tBoaH)_____year(TCF)

Ancient times______-_______~10,000 B.F.C*__- Sheritt's death____~800____8-9,000 B.F.C___- Cale B.'s birth____0_______~220** B.F.C____- Eruhaben's birth___0_______219 B.F.C_______- Choi Han arrives___17______600-700_________- KRS's og birth***__0_______<=763___________<=767 1!KRS's birth______0_______767_____________745 2!KRS's birth______0_______-_______________763 Ron's birth________0_______721_____________- Beacrox's birth____0_______751_____________- Alberu's birth_____0_______758_____________- Destr. of Molan____-_______~759****________- Cale's birth_______0_______763_____________- On & Hong's births_0_______771, 774________- Raon's hatching____0_______777_____________- Destr. of Harris___-_______28th March 781__- OG!Cale regresses__40______803_____________- KRS transmigrates__36______-_______________781 Cale meets ChoiHan_18______781_____________- Meeting On & Hong__7, 10___-_______________781 Meeting Ron________60______781_____________- Meeting Beacrox____30______781_____________- Raon's escape______4_______781_____________- Meeting Alberu_____23______-_______________781 Meeting Cale B.____16-21___-_______________783 Sealed god's test__20/38___783 (for 2!KRS)_765 or 787 (for 1!KRS)

28th March 781 - the only exact date we got I believe

Events which happened only in tBoaH (the Birth of a Hero timeline) or in both are on the left, events from TCF (Trash of the Count's Family timeline) are on the right.

"Destr." is short for "destruction", since I couldn't find a better shorter word

1!KRS and 2! KRS refer to Kim Rok Soo from Earth 1 (the 36 years old KRS turned MC Cale) and Kim Rok Soo from Earth 2 (the KRS who's 20 years old). (...which lead me to the whole confusion with dimension travel ages?? That's why there are 2 sides. How do you count age, from which timeline, before or after regression? So I decided to include both.)

* - Before Felix Calendar begins ** - or >240 B.F.C if his first life counts *** - the birth of KRS's originally intended body, taken over by White Star (Cale B.) through reincarnation **** - I think it was mentioned that Beacrox was 8? I'm not 100% sure tho since I don't remember the chapter


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2 years ago

How refreshing was it for Alberu, who lived his life being disrespected and ignored, to writhe in the fake-politeness of scammers, living beneath his third and second brothers, to fight so hard for respect-

To have his life then be manhandled into a position of power and have a guaranteed spot as the next in line for king, by a man who talks disrespectfully and becomes petulant at the slightest inconvenience

He’s not disrespectful because of Alberu’s political standing and he’s not whiny because he’s incompetent. He’s honest.

He’s disrespectful because- well, he’s just that way with everyone he’s comfortable with. If he acts respectful, it’s probably because he’s pretending in order to get something he wants.

He’s petulant, but only when it’s something that can be fixed. Oh your highness, can you pay my travel expenses? Oh your highness, can I have a gold plaque for my hard work?

The man wants money!

He’s not greedy for fame nor power, he doesn’t want a spot right next to the Crown Prince when he becomes king. He wants money, he wants to fix the problems that disturb his life, and he wants to be a slacker. The Crown Prince has all the resources to do those things! That’s his job. To create a peaceful kingdom that can still survive in war and chaos.

Cale just keeps dumping a bunch of resources on his head in order to do that.

Incessantly.

Like, he really doesn’t stop giving him information and allies.

Hah, but seriously.

He doesn’t stop.

He still hasn’t stopped.

Cale and Alberu are tools for each other. That’s their relationship. They use each other because what one person lacks, the other does not. Cale has information and connections, Alberu has influence and money.

It’s a ✨symbiotic relationship✨

1 year ago

I despise Venion so much omg

I Despise Venion So Much Omg
2 years ago

It hurts me to think that Cale's worst fear is not his family and people dying, but being the only one to survive again.

That's what I think the reason Cale is so ready to throw himself into danger is, because if he does, not only will he potentially save everyone, but he has a high chance of not being left behind again.

His hyungs died protecting him, and he had to live with the guilt afterwards. The thought of going through that, technically for the third time, is what pushes him to overuse his powers constantly. It's why he was able to complete the Thief's test the way he did, even though it'something he managed to stop himself from doing during his life as KRS.

His fear is not the fear of losing everyone, but the fear that he will be the only one left alive.


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2 years ago

tcf spoilers (ch 333+)

re-reading White Star's debut in 333 and what came after, and i am once again reminded of how terrifying he was as an antagonist before he became the fandom's silly little meme

some other bits and foreshadowing i forgot/missed and find interesting

WS is proficient enough as a mage to be able to send messages telepathically

...and he used that skill to pester Cale with one-way messages lmao

WS and Cale both felt a sense of kinship the moment they locked eyes, which they both chalked up to their similarities in abilities and appearance (but it's probably more because of KRS' soul recognizing its original body)

Eruhaben says WS looks 20 (and 200+ chapters later Cale himself says he looks to be in his early 20s. If og!Cale is older than KRS, does that mean it took KRS a few years before he got kicked out of his body by WS and settled into Earth 1? Or is it the time difference between the two worlds?)

WS just affectionately addressing Cale while spouting terrible things

2 years ago

Part 1

Cale sits on Alberu’s bed.

This… feeling, of his memories and feelings all contradicting. It’s a little disorienting.

His hands are dirty, but he knows they’re clean. He could lay down and roll around on the princes bed, but his memories show a blatant disregard for what the prince thinks about what he does, yet he knows that he has respected and cared about the prince for a long time-

So what is it? Does Cale secretly respect him? Is his disregard an act? No, it’s not. Disrespect is… a way to show respect? To hide his respect?

Cale develops a headache. There’s a lot of new information in his mind, rolling around like a thunderstorm, and it’s really starting to hurt.

His hand caresses the side of his head, and he aims his face into his lap, a frown forming. It… hurts.

It hurts.

Hopelessness drags on his new and good emotions. It hurts. He- he hates pain. His hands tremble.

Alberu watches Cale, unsure what could’ve happened to cause him to start crying. With a shaky mind, Alberu walks over to the frozen child sitting on his bed, making extra sure that his footsteps create noise. God, scaring a child? Scaring Cale? That would be a nightmare. He wouldn’t know how to handle it at all.

Despite Alberu’s desperate wishes, Cale is deep in his subconscious, overwhelmed by a self-induced headache.

So when Alberu reaches over for the boys shoulder (like how Cale would comfort everyone), Cale flinches. Hard. He throws his body to the side of the bed and pulls his arms up to his chest, staring up at Alberu’s figure.

Now, the Prince isn’t stupid. He knows what a flinch means, what it implies. Then why- he fumes- why is Cale of all people showing these responses? How bad did he have it in Korea?

So, while Cale lies on the bed and stares, Alberu decides that he’s too tired to deal with this. This is incredibly annoying. This is- fucking depressing. He hasn’t slept for two days and suddenly being forced into babysitting duty is grating on his nerves.

He walks away to order the nearest servant to deliver cookies to his room, while he starts to brew tea. When the boy on the bed has a clear head and Alberu has some more strength, he’ll consider asking what’s wrong.

Bringing the tea over to the bed, Cale stares at the cups.

“Dongsaeng?” Alberu sits on the bed next to Cale, who stops laying down. “Do you like sweet tea still, even when you’re like this?”

Cale pinches his lips together. Forgoing a verbal response, he nods his head to the question and starts to reach out.

‘Dirty’

‘Careless’

‘Irresponsible’

His hand freezes, and goes through a dozen calculations. Should he ask to grab the cup? He wouldn’t normally do that, no. Should he act more like an ignorant child, not as mature as he feels? Should he ask what he should do?-

Alberu watches the emotions that flit across the young face. They are all incredibly subtle, as if he’s used to being so insecure but hiding it underneath a layer of confidence. Alberu relates to it on an uncomfortable level.

He almost expects the kid to ask if he should take the cup, but Cale firms up his face and decides to disrespect the Crown Prince anyway by grabbing the cup and taking a big sip of it.

Good, Cale reasons, looking at Alberu’s face. He’s not mad, like he predicted. He’s learning the limits of the people he trusts because, while he’s in this different body and has this smaller mind, people will react unpredictably. Anticipate violence, prepare for rejection, and accept whatever he can get his hands on. His old lessons from when he was a kid float into his mind, and they provide a comfort that none of his older memories have given him yet.

They sit in silence, sipping on tea and observing each other. The other children are disturbingly quiet, but they aren’t crying or angry. They’re just… watching. Raon seems to be the most restless, while On and Hong wait from a distance.

Those three children recognize the signs of abuse the most. Ever since he opened his eyes, they could see it all. The hesitation. The fake confidence. The awkward tense-relax-tense game that Cale is playing in his mind. Like he’s trying to convince himself that he’s in a safe place, but it’s so hard to believe that he instinctively goes back to base one whenever he succeeds.

They’re going to launch their ‘attack’ in a few minutes, but only after cookies. A servant quietly brings in a tray, keeping her eyes very specifically on the desk she needs to leave it on. Raon still turns him and the kittens invisible for the brief time she’s there, but she looked so focused that she probably wouldn’t have seen them had they been sitting right next to the crown Prince. On applauds her in her mind.

Cale keeps his mouth shut. The last thing he should do right now is talk. He knows when he isn’t welcome, and while the (fond?) exasperation from the prince is not quite the same as Cale is used to, it’s close enough. He plans to stay quiet and do nothing. It’s dangerous to think about anything else.

What if he ruins his companionship with Alberu forever? That would be- bad. For when he’s able to be big again, of course. It would be… what’s the word?

Inconvenient.

Cale doesn’t feel 7 years old anymore. His mind has been growing, in a weird way. Like he’s subconsciously fighting against the curse by maturing his mind at a faster rate. He can think a little more clearly, analyze a little more precisely.

He finishes his tea and puts it down. He’s tired.

‘Dirty’

‘Disgusting’

‘Filthy’

He looks down at his hands. He turns his palm over, examining it. He sighs in relief. Clean. He’s clean right now.

He’s startled by a red ball of fur pressing its face into his open palm.

“Hong?” His voice is soft, open just like his palm.

Hong purrs, and Cale falls for the distraction. He sets out to pet the kitten who is so innocently asking for them.

All of a sudden he hears Alberu shout from his side and a flash of black streaks across his vision. He looks up, but then On has transformed into her human form and the 12 year old body is stronger than it should be, with how easily she grabs the 7 year old and throws him by the pillows.

Cale barely finishes bouncing from being thrown when he gets crushed by Raon.

“Human!”

Cale opens his eyes and looks up at the blue eyes peering down into his soul. “Raon…”

Raon cuts him off, resting part of his weight on Cale.

“We’re having naptime! Majority vote! You have to sleep, human!”

Cale frowned. He hadn’t had any cookies yet.

Raon interprets him wrong, and suddenly Cale is being thrust into Alberu’s arms. “Adults are always the best at cuddling! We’re leaving you to our most experienced member so you get the full package! Alberu, don’t let Cale go.” His words leave a chill in Cale’s body, and he resists the urge to shudder.

Then he realizes that Alberu’s arms had really tightened around him. Cale squirms, because, what? Why can’t he just cuddle with the kids?

The answer becomes abruptly clear. Cale, smooshed against Alberu’s chest, surrounded by two human cats and a dragon who insisted that he lay on top of the pile- discovers that, while Raon could use magic to restrain him, the human with long arms is just more effective at restraining people comfortably.

Cale pouts. He didn’t get any cookies.

Ron, Beacrox, and Choi Han arrive at the princes room. Ron was worried about him, while Choi Han was concerned that he wasn’t adjusting well. Does he feel safe? Has he eaten? Is the fact that they aren’t in Korea making it difficult? Meanwhile, Beacrox is just angry at a lot of things right now.

They found the demonic worshipper, but after torturing information out of him, they realized that Cale is in the Demonic God’s hands now. Killing the demonic worshipper doesn’t even break the curse.

They had run into Bud and Glenn while investigating, naturally. The merchant king had offered all of his resources to track down the culprit, which helped somewhat in finding him. Glenn offered them a quick teleport back to the palace, and they accepted.

“Young master-“

“Cale-nim!-“

“My friend! Sob!- um?”

Ron, Choi Han, and Bud speak all at the same time. They all pause however, at the sight of Raon glaring at them intensely. A transparent black shield covers a lump of bodies, and Glenn recognizes it as a soundproofing spell. He gets goosebumps at the mana swirling around the rest of the room dangerously.

Choi Han felt stunned. It has been a long while since Raon pointed his wrath at anyone in their family. What happened?

Ron then smiles, a chill covering the room instantly. “What are you covering, little dragon?”

Raon uncharacteristically stays silent. He looks like a real dragon at this moment, all cold glares while he drapes himself over his hoard.

Then Choi Han puts the dots together. The Crown Prince is missing, documents unfinished. The kittens can be vaguely seen on the side of the pile that Raon is laying on, and if he’s correct-

Cale is in the center.

Choi Han’s eyes sparkle at the opportunity in front of him. Bud takes a careful step away from him, but he’s not paying attention to that.

Choi Han loves small cute things. What’s more cute than a bunch of his favorite, small cute people (minus Alberu, who isn’t small, that he suspects is in the back) in a big cuddly pile?

Cale murmurs in his sleep, feeling an icy chill on the back of his neck. Someone’s plotting against him.

He becomes unsettled, pushing lightly against Alberu’s arms in protest to the sensation. Alberu, who has fallen into an incredibly deep sleep, just tightens his arms. Cale decides to ignore the feeling, after getting that slight ‘scolding.’

His mind, which had become around 9-10 in the short time that he had been thinking intensely, quiets. He allows himself to be comforted, and doesn’t notice the way his mind falls into that of a 8 year old during this nap.

He breathes softly, falls deeper into his sleep, and can’t feel the curse settle over his mind.

Choi Han fails in his attempts to sway the dragon to let him see. Raon, smarter than your average 6 year old, understands what Choi Han wants and what Cale wants, and that Cale should get what he wants right now. Privacy. Raon becomes even more determined to protect Cale while he’s in this younger state.

He’s vulnerable.

The dragon in him growls at this. Everyone in this pile has been abused. He doesn’t know much about Alberu, but he saw the understanding glint in his eyes, so Raon determines that the Crown Prince is also under his protection.

Do the people outside their bubble understand that? Do they think that his human just happened to land in the middle of the pile, blocked from the world’s eye?

Raon huffs at Choi Han’s antics, ignores Ron’s vague threat, and summons a second shield over the soundproof one, this one solid and not transparent.

The human told Raon that it’s okay to be selfish. He wants to hold their little group closer right now, and he doesn’t want to share.

Cale flinches in his new, deep sleep. Raon lays his head back down on the pile, using magic to keep his human the perfect napping temperature.

He curses that he can’t do more right now.

2 years ago

You know what??

De-aged Cale where its roksoo right??

He's sitting there anxiously as the adults discuss what the do with him. It's happening again. He knows they're going to get rid of him like some old, unwanted toy.

His stomach gurgles and growls. He keeps his eyes trained on the shoes everyone is wearing, ears burning. How embarrassing... He's usually better than this.

He jumps when a pair of shoes move in front of him. It's hard to hear what's going on when the cotton in your ears keep blooming. Suddenly, he's face to face with an old man... whose smile is.. pretty scary. Not that he'll say anything about it though. He can't figure out where to place his eyes. Adults don't like it when he looks at them in the eyes. They say he's being defiant, that they don't like the way he looks at them. But then they don't like it when he doesn't look them in the eye, something about finding the situation unimportant. He doesn't know what to do... So his eyes jump from meeting the old man's and back to things around the room. Back and forth, back and forth.

"young master," the man starts, "why don't you follow my son to the kitchen? My son, Beacrox, will get you something good to eat."

Oh! He can do that. He's been in kitchens before, so he willed himself to meet the man's gaze one last time before giving a small, but firm nod. Then, he hops off the plush couch and trails after the guy who must be Beacrox.

This man is stoic looking and not much of a talker. It's okay though, he isn't much of a talker either. They walk in silence to the kitchen, he tries to keep his breathing in check as he jogs to keep pace with the man. His steps must be too loud though since the man turns towards him and then slows his pace. So nice!!

Even when they get there, the man still hasn't said anything. He stands at the doorway, unsure of what he's needed for. The kitchen is clean... Extremely clean. How will he earn his food? What is he supposed to be doing here??

We makes his way up to the counter where he finds a rag. That'll do!! He takes it and wets it in the sink before making his way back to the sitting area. He drops to his hands and knees and begins to scrub at the already clean floor. The adults at home say that even if it looks clean, it's never clean enough! So surely this should be enough to earn his keep.

He hears a clatter and startles as the knife falls to the floor. The man's face isn't stoic anymore. The man is mad?? Is he cleaning wrong?? Roksoo is scared.

The man storms up to him and begins to reach out towards him. Roksoo fails to hold back a flinch. He's messed up, adults don't like it when he's scared. He squeezed his eyes shut, in hopes of hurting less.

Nothing comes. The pain never comes. Only a warm hand on his head?? He slowly opens his eyes and meets Beacrox 's. There's nothing, but hurt and eager swirling in the man's eyes. Why's he sad? Roksoo doesn't understand.

"young master..." Beacrox sounds strained. Again with that weird title.

Roksoo wordlessly watches the chef try to string together words. His own throat feeling too clogged up to ask what he did wrong.

He manages though.

"why.. why are you sad?" His words come out like small croaks. It's getting hard to speak again. Adults don't like it when he can't speak.

Beacrox's eyes just fill with more hurt, hurt, hurt as he opens and closes his mouth uselessly.

He seems to figure out what he wants to say though.

"young master, why are you on the ground?" Beacrox keeps his voice soft, keeps his tone open and forgiving.

"I didn't know what else I could do," he confesses like he's sinned. His eyes make their way back to anything other than the other's.

Beacrox brews silently, waiting for his master to finish his thoughts. Beacrox doesn't like where this is going.

"how else can I earn.." roksoo's palms feel sweaty where they're clenched at his sides.

"I don't deserve food yet," roksoo's words are firm and believing as he meets Beacrox's eyes.

The man's eyes seem to tremble as he processes what roksoo had said.

(Beacrox wants to skin whoever taught his young master this. He wants to make them beg for the sweet release of death as he slowly guides them towards it. Having them teeter on the edge of death and consciousness).

He snaps out of thought, saving them for later. The others will be hearing of this, they can all come up with the plans together.

"young master," Beacrox hopes his words will reach the boys heart, "you deserve everything."

He watches as the boy takes his bottom lip captive between his teeth. How the boy clenches at the hems of his shirt and tries to calm his breathing. How the boy is trying to blink away tears, but is failing.

"you are worthy" he whispers, removing a glove to pat roksoo's head. Beacrox looks seconds away from jumping back and escaping. Roksoo let's put a shaky laugh at the thought.

Right now it's hard to believe, but.. he wants to. He wants to believe that Beacrox is right. He'll try...

But he still follows Beacrox back to the counter and begs to help. He feels too antsy not doing anything.

All he's handed is a small bowl of snacks and he's told his job is to finish them by the time the meal is done cooking. He feels his heart swell. Roksoo feels like his heart is doing flips in his chest. He feels so safe.

-

Feeling like I probably post too much on this,, but I will.. continue. :)


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2 years ago

So I was wondering why Susie would think Toriel would have handcuffs just lying around in her kitchen drawer…

image

…but I remembered, Toriel used to be married to the town Police Chief.

image

That could explain why Susie is so nervous and formal around Toriel. How does one even conduct themselves in the home of a Police Chief’s wife?

Susie seems a little wary of being told to drop and do pushups or something.

image

At the same time, she likes Toriel quite a lot. Toriel seems to have left a strong, positive impression on Susie at some point.

image
image

Toriel and Susie met a long time ago, and don’t seem to have met since.

Susie remembers her from back then, but Toriel doesn’t remember Susie - she only knows who Susie is because Alphys talks about her.

image

It’s possible that Toriel might have helped a much younger Susie out of a bind with the Hometown police at some point, as the wife of the Police Chief at the time. Maybe she was found as a runaway from a nearby town?


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redibanni - RedIbanni
RedIbanni

I like blogging my Fixations and Analysis ----- An Amateur Writer

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