How The Fam Find Out Jason's Still Alive

PHEW! More Undercover RHatO AU

It was all Roy and Jason could to, watching in awe as Kori’s plan unfolded right before their very eyes. Step for step she played her part as a disowned princess on the prowl for new pleasures flawlessly. Her subtle flaunting of her new ‘pets’ sent the pleasure station alight with excitement. There was no missing the gossip and eyes that followed them around (made even more intense when Kori explained her humans were indeed wanted criminals on Earth).  It was only their third night on the station when they were called upon by another patron: their target. Seems the E.T. bastard who’d stolen all those humans from earth wasn’t able to train the humans they way he wanted to, and -Roy grimaced- sought Kori’s advice. . 

When the… thing was gone, Kori downed the rest of her liquor and set a burning hand on both Roy and Jason’s shoulders. 

“When I learn where he’s keeping them I’ll give you the signal. We shall get them out of here, I promise.” She kissed Roy and Jason in turn. “Endure just a little longer.”

Hotch Dynamics

Jack Hotchner & Hotch

Jack Paints his Nails: Hotch tries hard to be a good dad but he just has no idea what he’s doing

Jack and The Dog blurb

Dad Hugs: Jack just needs a hug (and some pancakes)

Jack visits at the hospital: Hotch gets hurt and Jack has some complicated feelings

Books And Bonding: Jack talks books and Hotch wishes he knew what to say

Working the Case: **huge warnings, not happy** It isn’t Hotch that finds Jack in that trunk

Home: Jack surprises his family

Kittens: Jack sneaks a cat into the house

In With The New, Out With The Old: Hotch packing Jack up for college

Puzzle Pieces: Hotch is a mystery to Jack

Sunday Morning: Happy DILF Day

Pretending: Hotch keeping himself pulled together so Jack can have fun at the park

Derek Morgan & Hotch

A Matter Of Trust: Derek Morgan does not trust Hotch but he’s working on it

Hotch’s Strawberry Ice Cream: If ice cream is what he wants then… that’s the least Morgan can do

Not Your Fault: Morgan under Mr. Scratch’s control attacks Hotch

Scratch: Hotch attacks the team

A Day At the Lake: it’s… just a day at the lake ft the team

Pancakes and Ice Pack: Hotch hurts his knee in a take down

Spencer Reid & Hotch

The Visit: Garcia and Reid make a much needed visit to Hotch after the stabbing

Wreck: Reid and Hotch 

ZugZwang: The aftermath of Maeve’s death

Thirteen Steps: Reid has to have a difficult conversation

Halloween: Reid and Hotch getting some comfort 5x01

Careful: Reid and Hotch post-Nameless, Faceless

The Safe Side: Hotch is getting older and that scares the shit out of Reid

Emily Prentiss & Hotch

Emily & the Slurpee: a road trip

Drinks with Dave: Emily and Hotch try to get Dave to go get drinks with them

Moments Too Late: College AU, Emily says something she shouldn’t have

Almost Somethings: What they nearly were

Penelope Garcia & Hotch

Just Breathe: Hotch is having a bad day and Garcia is there

The Office: There’s an emergency at the office

Late. Late. Late: Garcia’s late

Hank Morgan & Hotch 

Red Fish, Blue Fish: Hotch is sick and Hank knows just what to do

Other

The TV Man: Elle returns to see Hotch post-Foyet

Beth: Hotch & Beth

Hotch with a Daughter

Crawl Home: Emily whump– she just wants to come home

The Bridges Between Me and You: Emily hurt and distant

Pt1. // Pt.2 // next

Hood would never want to be verified and would actively hate being verified argue with the wall

Jason goes full cat 2

if i was 26 and had just woken up from a 70 year suicide-induced coma with no one in the present remembering who i am and instead conflating me with the ever changing image of the role i played in ww2 that now serves as american propaganda and 2 weeks ago i was watching guys get half of their faces blown off and a week after that the love of my life fell off of a moving train with me only being able to watch and then i had to like... deal with a billionaire nepo baby war profiteer calling me an old man and saying there's nothing special about me i would have started killing people. but unfortunately it happened to steve rogers. and he has, like, morals. so

Bruce truly hates magic with every pump and beat of his heart.

What kinda curse is Slang, anyway?

“This is the best day of my life.”

“Bro really thought he ate with that.” Bruce physically feels a full body shiver, charged with nausea and cringe. “This is level 10 cringe. Can’t have shit in Gotham.”

Dick is his earth bound angel, but he laughs like a demon at him, holding onto Jason for support, pledging his eternal loyalty to Zatana and her pettiness.

—

“Hey, old bat, hook me up with an adrenaline shot.”

What he wants to say is Jay, do not try and fight with 6 bullets in your stomach.

What comes out instead, through Bruce’s grit teeth and intense, fierce glaring, “Not you trying to go back to your corpse era. See how I only took 2 shots? Very demure. Very mindful.”

Jason passes out from blood loss, but mostly laughter.

—

“Chat, is this real?”

Stephanie barely bites back a full belly cackle. “I think he just asked us if we copied.”

“I wish I was Jason, 15.”

—

“This is not a slay environment. Killing is flop behavior.” He keeps his eyes shut and buries his face in his hands. Trying to convince Damian not to stab someone doesn’t seem to work.

Damian gives him a pat like he’s a pitiful cat. “I’ll only stab the non lethal areas.”

“God, I wish that were me.”

jason comes back to gotham as red hood and the batfam have no idea who he is or that he has anything to do with the league of assasins until during a wayne gala theres a hostage situation and before bruce or anyone can figure out a way to go suit up a crime lord appears and saves everybody only to have a publically friendly catch up session with.... damian wayne.

damian covers to the press afterwards that its because of red hoods 'i dont hurt kids' rule and that he'd met the guy a few times in crime alley before he was dumped on bruce's doorstep. gotham's citizens are slightly concerned but honestly? the scary stabby child that's been glaring at them from the corners of parties since he got here with absolutely no backstory or history in gotham turning out to have a past with crime alleys most infamous protector/crime boss? it's a little comforting.

it's less comforting to the bats.

damian, getting out the car after the gala: I don't know what hood was thinking, making me his public ally. he's lucky the simpletons of this city bought that, don't you agree father?

damian: *turns to see the rest of the family staring at him with hard eyes*

damian:

damian: ...what did i do?

everybody's less than pleased that damian withheld the info that red hood is trained and from the LOA, but damian simply maintains that they never asked. when further questioned about why his relationship with hood was so familial and about what his identity is... they get

damian: hood was perhaps my favourite tutor back home, the only one i didn't kill. he taught me many things, from how to poison somebody to famous quotes and sayings from classic literature.

bruce: what. is. his. name.

damian: you know what one of those sayings was? 'snitches get stitches'

dick: *slams his face into the wall*

tim: well you did want him to be more childlike.

they eventually have to move past it because damian won't budge, unfortunately jason is finding this whole scenario fucking hysterical because holy shit he'd thought about coming back and pissing off his family through their secret personas but he hadn't even considered the beauty of coming back and pissing them off through their public personas.

and from then on the entire batfamily has to deal with pretending to be nervous or wary every time the red hood comes and crashes their very real wayne public events. it's fucking incredible. jason can't believe that he was gonna try and beat the shit out of tim to freak out bruce when all he had to do was grab a glass of champagne, walk up to the dude, and ask politely how stocks at WE are doing. 'brucie wayne' has no fucking clue what to do, and jason just poured the champagne against his helmet and let it all fall to the ground and everybody's too scared to say anything.

nobody else bats an eye when red hood becomes an occasional presence at these fancy events, apart from the people who know for a fact they could be on his shitlist. mostly because this is gotham, but also because they know he's a crime lord so like... riches and business running wise he kinda fits the bill for these things anyway? and if the stoic kid of brucie wayne eases up around him then the whole 'i dont hurt kids' thing must ring true so it's not like he'll cause too much trouble. also the guards are too scared to tell him he's not allowed in, so there's that.

the bats hate everything about this. they don't even know what red hoods game is, they have no idea why they're being tortured and they're getting paranoid about it. damian's absolutely no help because he's just happy to 1. get to see his brother on a regular basis again, and 2. get to see his brother find a less self-destructive outlet for the pit rage he's watched jason struggle with for years.

it's also just really fun to watch tim accidentally fall asleep against a wall mid-gala, wake up to red hood's helmet 2 inches from his face, and then almost break his own hand trying to punch it because he forgot that he wasn't in-mask and had to hold back last second.

dick is mostly just indignant because every time red hood shows up and hangs around near damian, damian immediately becomes a picture perfect public persona, interacting with the elites of gotham with the same expertise of tim or bruce. he's so mad that a crime lord can wrangle HIS little brother in public but he can't, that he completely disregards the whole crime lord thing and starts bugging red hood both in and out of mask about how to be a better older brother to damian. at one point he corners red hood on a rooftop mid patrol.

nightwing: ok, seriously, when I asked damian not to be rude to the new investors he told a woman her coat looked like it would hold up in a fight against two-face, but when YOU ask he becomes a model citizen, what is UP with that?

red hood, being an asshole: *gasp* y-you're.... YOU'RE RICHARD GRAYSON?

nightwing:

nightwing: ....oh my god you didn't know?

red hood: no i fucking knew you're just an idiot. and damian listens to me because I'm the only tutor he could never kill and he knows i'll beat his ass with my magic swords.

nightwing:

red hood: and also im the only one at the league who played Just Dance with him so i get special privileges, like telling him what to do.

dick asks damian to play Just Dance with him that night and damian just looks at him all forlorn, like 'it wouldn't be the same without the exhilarating thrill of knowing if anybody catches us hood will be stabbed and thrown in the lazarus pit again as punishment for corrupting me... it was really an unfair punishment considering he replaced grandfather's bed with a plastic pool covered by a sheet once, and the only punishment he got for that was being banned from the family dinners for two weeks'

dick stares at him. damian just adds 'he used to sit outside the window like a dog. watching and occasionally yelling about the injustice. mother gave him a plate of roast potatoes through the window once. grandfather disapproved.'

nobody knows quite what to do about red hood becoming a gotham elite, but they are becoming more concerned about damian's family's dynamic every goddamn day.

okay so i have this really self serving and inconsequential headcanon that steve really likes apple juice??? but only when he’s like,,, sick or upset. and essentially,,,, just. bucky always keeping little boxes of motts apple juice in the fridge and in his day bag for steve to grab when he’s upset or feeling anxious 

like in central park one day, steve has a little panic attack and bucky just talking him through it on a bench and then pulling out some apple juice and

“here, stevie” 

and steve just *sniffle* “thanks, buck”

this is definitely a thing that sammy first noticed like,,, while they were on the bucky hunt. like in hotels, steve would always go for the apple juice and one morning he wakes from a nightmare and sam’s like

“can i getcha anything, man?”

“um…. is there any way you could get me some apple juice from the breakfast bar?”

and sam’s just like “oh– sure.”

anyway yeah apple juice is his comfort drink

Hello. Your Koyonagi/Ichigo story is really amazing. Thank you for writing such wonderful stories. I really adore your characters. Although I wonder how Koyonagi would react about Ichigo's past when Ichigo finally told him about it. And will Koyonagi be jealous of Ichigo to anybody with whom Ichigo was close in his time, for example Kisuke? It would be interesting to see.

Thank you! I’m glad you’ve enjoyed reading my fics =D I would imagine Koyonagi’s definitely the possessive type. He’d probably take the whole time travel thing more or less in stride pretty quickly, but maybe sometimes, Ichigo points people out to him, talks about them fondly, wistfully, knowing he’ll never get them back. 

Thank you! I’m glad you’ve enjoyed reading my fics =D I would imagine Koyonagi’s definitely the possessive type. He’d probably take the whole time travel thing more or less in stride pretty quickly, but maybe sometimes, Ichigo points people out to him, talks about them fondly, wistfully, knowing he’ll never get them back. And Koyonagi doesn’t mind, he likes that Ichigo trusts him enough to speak of his past and his secrets. But then one day Ichigo says something in passing when they bump into some of the captains at a bar, maybe Kisuke is pretending to be way more drunk than he actually is in a corner and Ichigo takes one look at him and rolls his eyes and tells Koyonagi, “He’s not even a little bit drunk. I thought I was taking advantage of him when he dragged me to bed after celebrating one of the battles we won, but apparently he just uses that as a front to gather blackmail.” He snorts. “Also he has a surprising amount of poetry memorized. He recited like three of them to me just to prove I could sleep with him guilt-free.”

And okay, Koyonagi already knew Ichigo wasn’t a virgin, but also he’s self-aware enough that he can look at Urahara Kisuke and acknowledge that there’s more than a few similarities between them. Knowing Ichigo’s slept with him - even if it was a different future Urahara - sinks heat and claws beneath his ribcage, and the next time he bumps into the Twelfth Division captain, he can’t help cataloging all the potential weaknesses he can see while a voice in his head hisses that it would be easy to make the man disappear. Urahara seems to sense his animosity immediately, and his head doesn’t snap around, but he does stiffen, and when he casually turns and meets Koyonagi’s gaze across the courtyard of the Shiba estate, the silly fool facade he usually wears has almost completely dropped off his face, leaving behind flat grey eyes and a killer’s detached mien. It’s like looking into a mirror, and Koyonagi has to reflect with some amusement that Ichigo certainly has interesting tastes in men.

But then Ichigo is there, always so much more perceptive than people think he is or even remember he is, and he takes one look at both of them, rolls his eyes, pats Urahara on the shoulder with something like apology, then saunters right over to Koyonagi, and in the most public display of mine that Koyonagi has ever been on the receiving end of, Ichigo crowds him up against the tree behind him and pulls him into an aggressively filthy and wildly inappropriate kiss. By the time he pulls back, Koyonagi is half-hard and has completely forgotten Urahara as he blinks rapidly at a smirking Ichigo. Kaien is wailing something about eyes and bleach in the background but all Koyonagi pays attention to is Ichigo leaning into him and grumbling, “I’m with you, you idiot. As if anyone before can compare.”

After that, Koyonagi still gets jealous sometimes, but as reminders go, Ichigo’s are very effective.

those pirates are doing anything except for going for one piece