You Wound Me And Then You Eat Me?

I shouldn’t… but-

Giant Octopus Plush and Crochet Pattern // Adopte Ton Poulpe

I think it would be really funny if Shen Yuan was a successful author in his first life. Like a high brow, award winning, people dissect his work in lit classes, successful writer. People think he’s reclusive and brooding in a J.D. Salinger way (he’s not, he’s just an antisocial nerd) and his books are super emotional and reflect on the human condition (an accident, SY genuinely does not realize when things are tragic, nor when they’re super homoerotic). He becomes Shang Qinghua’s literary hero, and yeah he wants to be able to write like him one day, but bad smut is what pays the bills regardless of what Peerless Cucumber has to say. So once they’ve both transmigrated, they’re arguing about his writing and SQH is like “Well if it’s so easy to write a book, why don’t you do it?!” and SY is like “I have, it’s not that hard.” (think Elle Woods talking about getting into Harvard energy) and SQH is all sarcastic “Let me guess, you were Shen Yuan in your past life? Pfft” and SY is just like “yeah, actually”. And SQH just blue screens because he cannot accept that this emotionally constipated doofus who’s read every chapter of his shitty smut book is the same guy who wrote a book that made him cry so hard he couldn’t breathe. He just turns around and walks away and then walks off the edge of Bai Zhan Peak like this.

I've been sitting on this pattern and tutorial for a while now! so time to finally share it with you! I was lamenting that the jellycat pip and sugar mice were long retired and difficult to get your hands on unless you are willing to pay much more than they retailed for each mouse, so i decided to try and eyeball a pattern and make some myself! they're not exact as i only used constructed visual references but they're close! please note that this pattern set is intended for personal use only. Rough tutorial under the cut!

This pattern is for printing onto A4 but you can check your scale with the measurements I've provided or just play around with how big or small you want to try and make them! i didn't really get any wip photos of pip mouse but it's method is largely the same with the nose being the major change, which i will detail in text in the instructions below.

for sugar mouse i would recommend using polar fleece as it will act the right way for the ears to do their squishy marshmallow looking thing. but minky should also work or other similar fabrics! for pip mouse if you can find a similar curly looking fabric with a thin backing that'll be ideal but fleece will also work well, you just wont get the furry texture, you want a fabric with a little bit of stretch to it. i however would not recommend fabrics like felt or non stretch cotton for these guys as it's likely to not take shape the same as there's no give to the fabric.

once you have printed out the pattern and cut the pieces in your fabric, you'll want to sew the ears up and turn them inside out, then put them aside for later. just leave them as is for now but here you can see i was playing around with pinching the turned through ear into shape.

Then moving on, sew the back pieces together along the spine and front of face. you then want pull the bottom open ends apart gently and place the open sides flat up against the base piece so that they're aligned, it can be good to pin this in place so it doesn't shift.

then, get your tail rope, and tie a knot at either end, placing the base of it inbetween the seam at the butt so that it'll sit in the right place, then sew the seam up directly with the tail in place, make sure you sew through the rope to secure it and make sure it doesnt shift. Sew around the bases seam leaving a hole in one side so that you can then turn your mouse through.

once turned through you will want to stuff your mouse with polyfill quite a bit so it takes shape! i like to put weighted beans in mine for extra effect, you can use dried rice or wheat too, just sew a little circle pouch a bit smaller that the mouses base with scrap fabric and fill and seal! then insert into the turning hole while you stuff. once stuffing is done you can sew the hole up with a ladder stitch. the weight from the beads will allow your mouse to sit up quite well.

next you will want to get those ears you put aside, take each corner and bring the ends together in the middle. then sew them gently together at the ends with one or two stitches in about the same spot. you want them to look 3d so dont sew the ends to the back of the ear, just end to end so they meet in the center.

Then pin the ears in place on the head

then you need to ladder stitch the ears in place while they're pinned so they dont shift around, go all the way around the outside edge of each.

now you're almost done! next they just need a face! sugar mouse only needs embroidery by way of a french knot for both the eyes and nose (you can find good video tutorials on how to sew a french knot online), pip mouse will also need a french knot for the eyes but has a separate process for it's nose. (for the pip mouses nose you will need to leave the marked nose hole open and then stitch the nose fabric to the square nose backing in line with the dotted direction on the pattern, (it should look kind of baggy when it's unstuffed) sew it up completley with no hole, then cut a tiny slit in the backing and add polyfill there before closing with a basic stitch, then you ladder stitch the nose directly to the marked nose hole)

in order to hide the embroidery anchor knots i find the best way is to start by going down through the middle of the ears and then coming back up where you want the eye to be, and then going back down and up through the ear for the finishing knot, as it creates a very easy cover for them and looks nice and clean!

then you have yourself a little buddy!

haha they're great to squish! if you use this pattern i'd love to see your results!

Shiny metal!!! ✨Freaking love bismuth

I’ll check these out later

You had people send you fics, but what are personally your fic recommendations?

Or fics you like in general or just find cool/neat?

WELL- First off you can always assume that I'm highly recommending any fic I've drawn art for, that's me pointing a neon sign at it and saying GO READ AND LEAVE A NICE COMMENT TO THE WRITER! I'm gonna go dig in my history to get some recs.

- "dumbstruck when you're tender" by pennydaniels This fic is SO good, I wanted to yell about it by making a drawing but I just couldn't decide what to draw. It's a timetravel fix-it fic where Liu Mingyan goes back in time and fixes the plot by joining Qing jing and basically spends the entire story making SQQ go "what the fuck is WRONG with this girl" .

It scratches an itch in my brain. 10/10 go read it.

"We should stick together" by pennydaniels (again <3)

As the author put it, SJ babytraps LQG without the baby. It's honestly so well written, (i want to personally break the face of SJ's Shizun) there's also a sequel fic where sj is de-aged and its so sweetttttt aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

"held within the sharp and the curving" by corduroyserpent

I've read this the other day and really enjoyed it!!! It's Gongyi Xiao/Zhuzhi-Lang. Zhuzhi-Lang brings Gongyi Xiao back from the dead and its a bit of a mess and then it turns so tenderrr

"How To Train Your Empolyee" by ParueCake (MiraEyeteeth)

I think about this fic so much. It's so good. Shen Yuan is a dragon and he needs someone to help him take care of chores around the house, he gets a tiny terrified Binghe to do the job. But honestly, LQG steals the show for me (CALL ME BIASED, HE'S MY FAV) There one scene in particular that just gives me the biggest smile whenever I think about it and it's when SY and LQG are sparring and SY keeps yeeting LQG far away and he keeps coming back like a cat that likes to be thrown around. ALSO LQG TRYING TO APPLY A TALISMAN ON HIMSELF TO GET RID OF MIND CONTROL AND IT'S NOT WORKING BECAUSE IT'S JUST THE WIFE BEAM- IT'S SO FUNNYYYY Mira said something about writing a LQG pov and I'm staring longingly in their general direction.

"A person I can't recall" by milktan

Honestly, I could recommend all their fics (They are ALL amazing and the ARTTT) but this one scratches that itch in my brain that loves funny misunderstandings like these. You can sum it up as: yqy: oh, my poor shidi is so traumatized :( sqh: FUCK FUCK FUCK *TROWS A MOLOTOV* 10/10 amazing shenanigans

"Seamless" by elanor_pam

This one is just the first chapter but it's so good already!!! Timetravel fix it where we get a front-row seat as YQY absolutely TEARS into the Qiu's, just one chapter and it's already PEAK just for the absolute smack at Qiu Jianluo.

"Celestial Afterglow" by elanor_pam (again <3 )

This one is a weird one, but I had a lot of fun reading it. SQH saves the plot by setting up the weirdest unintentional voyeurism session ever. SQQ turns into a living CLAMP illustration, Xin Mo is defeated by the sluttiest flower in the realm, LQG unlocks the particle effect. Everyone has a great time and the OPM gets destroyed as a little treat <3

[This idea has been rattling in my brain and I had to share it.]

I know we all love the ‘humans are space orcs’ concept… but imagine, onboard the new ship they’ve been assigned to, the human meets an actual space orc. A massive monster… fangs and tusks and scars and a battle-hardened stare, looming over all the other life forms on the ship in its thick indestructible armour it refuses to remove. It barely drinks, it doesn’t need sleep, its massive shoulders are heavy with the terrible things it has experienced. Compared to the squishy & delicate human body, this thing is a walking tank.

… Except instead of hating/ignoring one another, the human and the monster start bonding over both coming from death planets. The human is excited to find a life form who doesn’t quiver with fear at the vague description of a jellyfish and the monster is ecstatic to meet someone who understands the feeling of being bitten by a qua’lem (cats are pretty close). They sit together and compare dangerous animals and locations as the other aliens look on in confusion and fear… oh, you also have dense jungles of deadly hidden predators, boiling acid lakes, tamed predatory killers, and areas with horrendously high and low temperatures? Sick!! 

It doesn’t take long before the two of them become totally inseparable. The human loves not feeling like some kind of crazy outsider and the monster is overjoyed they’ve finally found an equal in this unkillable marshmallow.

Monster: When I was a youngling, a grol-lik stung straight through my armour. The pain lasted for approximately 16 human hours. Human: Oh yeah man, I get that. As a kid I got a wasp stuck in my shirt. It stung me like four times, it was awful, and all my cousins just laughed at me… Monster: [using their arm screen to research human courting methods] I see.

been thinking about fantasy/scifi rule systems and free will

Moutain Goat

Constructive feedback is welcome, I am new to pixel art and this is my first (mostly) finished piece.

I had no idea on how to do the sky

Duolingo Sucks, Now What?: A Guide

Now that the quality of Duolingo has fallen (even more) due to AI and people are more willing to make the jump here are just some alternative apps and what languages they have:

"I just want an identical experience to DL"

Busuu (Languages: Spanish, Japanese, French, English, German, Dutch, Italian, Portuguese, Chinese, Polish, Turkish, Russian, Arabic, Korean)

"I want a good audio-based app"

Language Transfer (Languages: French, Swahili, Italian, Greek, German, Turkish, Arabic, Spanish, English for Spanish Speakers)

"I want a good audio-based app and money's no object"

Pimsleur (Literally so many languages)

Glossika (Also a lot of languages, but minority languages are free)

*anecdote: I borrowed my brother's Japanese Pimsleur CD as a kid and I still remember how to say the weather is nice over a decade later. You can find the CDs at libraries and "other" places I'm sure.

"I have a pretty neat library card"

Mango (Languages: So many and the endangered/Indigenous courses are free even if you don't have a library that has a partnership with Mango)

Transparent Language: (Languages: THE MOST! Also the one that has the widest variety of African languages! Perhaps the most diverse in ESL and learning a foreign language not in English)

"I want SRS flashcards and have an android"

AnkiDroid: (Theoretically all languages, pre-made decks can be found easily)

"I want SRS flashcards and I have an iphone"

AnkiApp: It's almost as good as AnkiDroid and free compared to the official Anki app for iphone

"I don't mind ads and just want to learn Korean"

lingory

"I want an app made for Mandarin that's BETTER than DL and has multiple languages to learn Mandarin in"

ChineseSkill (You can use their older version of the course for free)

"I don't like any of these apps you mentioned already, give me one more"

Bunpo: (Languages: Japanese, Spanish, French, German, Korean, and Mandarin)

if you’re white and wanna write a poc character and feel awkward about it i implore you to ignore any twitblr stuff treating it as a massive ethical burden and instead come in more with the same mindset you’d have if you wanted to write about idk firefighters but didn’t know anything about firefighters so you do... research. Like fuck off with the weird kinda creepy calls for spiritual introspection you’re not writing about god damn space aliens you’re writing about humans and if you think you need more perspective of different life experiences just read?