That's My HAROLDDD!!!!!!!!!

....

“dear sirius,”

Please please please don’t be mad. Remember how I told you that Hagrid had made a new friend? Well… 

His new friend was a dragon and we had to help smuggle it out to Charlie (Ron’s brother) and we got caught by McGonagall and we lost 150 points and McGonagall said she’d have to write to our parents so I’m writing this really fast because I’m hoping you’ll get my letter first so that you don’t get too shocked when a Hogwarts owl comes through the wards. 

Please don’t yell at me too much when you see me at the next Quidditch match. I won’t be doing it again, I swear on your mum’s portrait. 

Love, 

Harry

Dear Sirius,

Our new Defense teacher is just as much of a loony as you told me he’d be. And his robes make me wish I was completely blind. Can you send me another one of your old books? I really really don’t think I’ll be learning much of anything this year. At least anything of value (although if you want to know what Gilderoy Lockhart’s favorite colour is, I can let you know). 

Love,

Harry

Dear Sirius,

I FORGOT MY SIGNED HOGSMEADE PERMISSION SLIP CAN YOU PLEASE SEND IT TO ME! URGENTLY! THANK YOU!

Also do you want any more Sugar Quills when I go to Honeydukes? I remember you were on your last one when I left.

Love,

Harry

Dear Sirius,

You probably already heard, but I can’t come home from Christmas this year. There’s going to be a stupid Yule Ball at the stupid school on Christmas day and I have to go because I’m a stupid champion and I have to find a stupid date because I have to open the stupid ball. And learn how to stupid dance!

I think I left my stupid dress robes in my closet. Can you send them to me? Also, how do I ask someone to come with me to the ball?

Missing you and your horrid Christmas decor.

Love, 

Harry

Dear Sirius,

I know you told me to tell you if anything weird happens this year and I think something just did. The new Defense teacher is a witch from the Ministry-absolutely horrid woman. I had a detention with her (yes I know the term only just started and no you may not ask why) and she had me doing lines, only the quill she gave me was kind of strange? It didn’t use ink. It sorta… used my blood I think. Or at least the ink was red. Carved the words I was writing into the back of my hand. Healed right up though. No scars or anything.

Don’t lose your mind. I’m sure it’s fine. I’m just telling you now so that you can’t yell at me later for keeping  “important information” from you like the whole Philosopher’s Stone Disaster of ‘92.

Hope to see you soon. Schoolwork is slowly killing me.

Love,

Harry

I can’t stop thinking about this tiktok i saw of a girl who was an extra in the good omens s2 bar scene and at one point david tennant just SMASHED into a wall and she was like omg are you alright and he said yeah he could just barely see with the snake eye contact lenses and the sunglasses and now i think about it every time i rewatch the confession scene like man walked off turned back around and pin-the-tail-on-the-donkeyed michael sheen’s pursed lips

wish i could be the old lady in the moon....

Quotes: 1.) Louise Glück, From Averno; “Blue Rotunda” 2.) Ocean Vuong, from On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous 3.) Clarice Lispector, from Selected Crônicas; “Excess and Privation ,” 4.) Rachel Cusk, on the reception of Aftermath, as cited in Olivia Sudjic’s Exposure

Art: 1.) Daniel F. Gerhartz 2.) Adrian Ghenie, Henrik Uldalen 3.) Helene Delmaire, Glenn Brown 4.) Alexandra Levasseur

oh gawd he is hawt!

OG drama queen Sirius Black

over??OVER???

bruh i have an emotional breakdown every time i see a cat!!! A FUCKING CAT!

As you can obviously see, I am not over All The Young Dudes by MsKingBean89, at all.

*insert j's lullaby (darling i'd wait for you)*

idk how this happened but somehow spotify went from ziggy stardust to love story just when james started saying his vowsss!!!!

Autumn and Lily, James Potter's Two dearest Sights..

His Two absolute and favourite things.

He still can't believe it. His Lily, his love, was finally going to be his, they were finally Going to be 'Jily' (what Sirius likes to call them) officially!

No boundaries, No regulations. It was just going to be him and his Wife.

"You may now speak your vows" The Pastor's words shook him out of his thoughts.

James cleared his already dry throat and glance at his best man; his brother, Sirius Black. Who was grinning like an Idiot for his best friends happiness and 'doom' as he likes to call it.

He rotate his gaze to the crowd where his Friends , Remus and Peter were looking at him, admiration and love in their eyes for their mate, on a little left were his parents , Euphomia and Fleamont Potter.

Her mother was sobbing while his father was holding her..On the verge of tears himself.

From the corner of his eyes, he can see his Mini ..the Strictest Professor with teary eyes and a smile on his wedding..Woah, that's a sight to remember, he thought.

Lily's father was a crying mess too..her mother consoling him..well, someone's emotional for his daughter..

Their close friends, Professor Dumbledore, The order and..Lily.

What else can he ask for? He's blessed, blessed with everything.

He now,turned and saw his world, his would- -be-wife smiling at him.

And that's when he forgot to breathe..With her green eyes..his white lace dress, her veil and that smile worth dying, he was unable to hold back his tears.

This was finally going to be happen..all those years of wait, of redemption, of patience, of Love.

She was finally going to be his..

His lily flower was going to be his.

"Mr. Potter, the vows" the pastor repeated..and he Again shook his trance..With another glance at his bride and his best mate he started pouring his heart.

"I, James Potter, Promise to cherish her wife in sickness and in health, whether I'm poor or On the top of this world I promise to be hers, and hers only... I'll stand back on her achievements, beside on her kindness, and on her front to support her..

I'll be the first one to hold her tears and the one to make her laugh.. ( Sirius: Oi prongs that's my job!!) My glared was enough to shut him.

I belong to and for Lily, always and forever."

Applauses and Hooting can be heard from the small crowd..

Lily was shedding happy tears, and I? I was as promised, the one to stop them from falling.

She took a hold of my hand and I kissed her's instead.

"Ms. Evans, your vows please" The pastor requested.

She looked at her parents and then me, she smiled before proceeding.

"I lily evans, vows to Be everything James will ever need , whether to take care of him like a mother, or joke with him like a friend, to guide him like a father or to challenge him like a rival ..I promise to fullfill everything and to become his and his for eternity..and be The one James Potter improved for.. I promise to be always be his lily flower.

I take James as my Man, for always and forever "

The applauses and Hootingwere louder this time..oh deer.. is lily stealing my thunder ? A thought crossed his agile mind, but he brushed it away. It was his wedding afterall.

The time passed so fast but he can remember every single thing. His flower and him.

Previously we had seen Sirius surprising Remus with a kiss Today we’re witnessing Remus surprising Sirius with a hug ^ω^

11 days more y'all......gear up swiftiesz!!

I love taylor swift

wow. okay WOW!

The Best Worst Thing to Have Ever Happened pt. 6

read parts 1-5 here (links to part 5, the rest are there)

AU in which Jily is still alive but Harry chooses to stay with Wolfstar and everything is worse now.

(thanks for following along, bebes and letting me guide you through another heartbreaking endeavor. xoxo)

--

January 1996

“So I don’t…have to go back?” Harry asked from their kitchen table, looking at Remus over the sandwich he prepared. Their kid had come home, duffle over his shoulder, running to their bedroom to find Sirius, without even having been filled in on the details. He was just happy to have an excuse to be there against his godfather's side. Sirius had slept for the longest length of time in months, dodging the alarm clocks and morning sun, even as both Remus and Harry got out of bed. Remus told him to take his time, last Remus saw Sirius had been immersed in a long shower.

“Do you want to?”

“Not really.”

“Then, no.” Remus did his best to keep his voice level, not wanting to show Harry just how truly angry he still was. Even through James calling through the mirror. Even with the post received that morning from Lily asking just to talk. Remus wasn’t interested in talking. Remus was only interested in guarding Harry and Sirius, and though he never thought it would be the case, that meant staying away from Lily. And James.

“But I thought….” Harry trailed off, eyes going down to his plate, “I thought I couldn’t? I don’t want to be a pain, I’m not…it’s fine over there, Moony, I promise. They’re nice!”

Remus put down his cup to put two fingers under Harry’s chin, tilting his face upward again so they could make eye contact, “I know this has gotten very messy, and that is our fault entirely. You are a child--”

“I am not.”

“You will be my child until I am dead and buried, love, that’s just how it works. You’ll forty and I’ll be…one hundred probably and you will still be my kid,” Remus told him, “What I mean is…you are not responsible for the actions of the people who are supposed to take care of you. None of this is your responsibility to worry about, but it’s very kind that you are. Makes you a good person.”

Dark eyebrows knitted together behind glasses, “So what happens now?

“I don’t know yet,” Remus admitted, “I had only gotten so far as to this moment…and unfortunately may need to ask Sirius for some…guidance for the next parts.”

Harry grinned softly, “Might make me a bad person, a bit, but I kind of like it when Sirius scolds someone who isn’t me...like when he goes and shouts at Snape?”

“Cheers to that, love.” Remus returned his smile, raising his cup to his lips as Harry went back to lunch, both of them eagerly waiting for Sirius to come downstairs.

--

“He deserves to get to know them, Remus.”

“They don’t deserve to get to know him.”

“She was just mad.”

“I've been mad at you plenty and have never said those things.”

“Remus.”

“Sirius.”

Sirius sighed and ran a hand over his hair, pulling back the covers on the bed, “I--”

“I’m glad, that you can forgive and I am glad that you are made up of second chances, Sirius when it comes to how you’re treated. But I’m not, and I…I am happy to supervise their visits again but like hell is he spending a single night over there.”

“I’m just trying to figure out how this can be amicable.”

“Amicable stopped being a possibility the second they asked the ministry to keep looking.”

Sirius cleared his throat and crossed to where Remus was standing at the bathroom sink. He wrapped his arms around his husband's waist from behind, settling his forehead into his shoulder. He could’ve stayed there forever. Where it was simple and easy and his husband could hold some of the weight he’d been carrying around since he had woken up in the dead of night with a feeling. It was still there. “Fudge says it…shouldn’t take too long for the case to get closed because they…don’t really have one. Harry won’t be involved at all.”

“Good,” Remus said and Sirius wished he could detach the way Remus had. Pretend it was just two strangers and not his best friend and his wife. Not the person whose family had raised him. Remus's hand fell on top of Sirius’s around his waist and Sirius could feel his fingers trace over the tattoo of Harry’s birthday on his wrist, “In case I make fun of you for it again later and forget…thank you for obsessively keeping every bit of documentation about Harry we’ve ever gotten. Neatly organized too. I’d be very fucked without you.”

Sirius laughed, kissing the top of Remus’s shoulder through his long sleeve shirt.

--

James had floo-ed over to Number 12, Harry set to go back to school in just under two weeks, wanting to spend time while he could. Harry was alone in the sitting room when he arrived. He had stayed up talking with Sirius late into the night, not quite having the words to cover everything Lily had said or erase them completely. Even if Sirius was quicker to put things aside, clinging to everything that was familiar, even if it wasn’t good for him, James knew Sirius remembered everything. James knew the hurt was still lurking in the caverns of his best friend's body, alongside the words Orion and Walburga Black had said to him as a child.

He’s not your kid sitting comfortably next to You’re not wanted here, Sirius, get out.

“Oh. Hey,” he greeted when he saw James, not quite a smile, but not quite a frown either.

“Hey, are…your…Remus and Sirius here?”

Harry nodded, “They’re around. Did you see the snow? We could probably have a proper fight in the backyard…”

“Sounds good,” James smiled, “I’m going to go find them, just let them know?"

“I’ll be here,” Harry looked back down, at the book in his lap but the color of the pages caught James’s eye.

“What are you working on?”

“Oh, uh…it’s just my journal. Nothing important.”

“I journal too. Did you know that?”

“Mhmm. Sirius told me. That’s why I started…he gave me all of your old ones too. So I could get to…know you, I guess,” Harry looked up at him again, “Kind of weird that I read them now considering…I think I know too much.”

Sirius told me.

The journal even looked the same as the one James wrote in.

James snorted, “Please tell me you stopped before seventh year?”

“I really wish I did.”

--

Lily was in the kitchen, putting biscuits onto a tray, ready to go join Harry, Remus, and James in the sitting room, the snow falling outside. Everything was made fresh, and Lily asked Harry to pick a record to listen to. There was faint music playing, light conversation, a noticeable space in the room that would’ve been for Sirius had he wanted to come over again. He hadn’t spoken to Lily, aside from through cordial post regarding Harry, even if the early morning mirror conversations had resumed with James.

“Is this Joni Mitchell?” Lily asked, guitar filling the sitting room, Harry coming to sit in the armchair.

“Yeah,” Harry grinned, “She’s the best for snow days.”

“I love Joni Mitchell. Did you know that?”

Harry nodded again, taking the cup of tea Lily held out for him, “Thank you. Sirius told me. We have a bunch of records that used to be yours, play them a lot. I suppose you could have them back?”

“No…no, keep them.”

--

There was a knock at the door of his study and Sirius sat up from where he was reclining in his desk chair. He was supposed to be collecting documentation, the entire cabinet in his desk designated for Harry pulled open and untouched. Birth certificate, schooling records, every single Healer appointment, and broken bone; a drawing Harry had made at nine that won a prize at school, his first detention from Hogwarts, a copy of a Hogsmeade permission slip. Not a single moment of Harry’s life had gone unaccounted for, and all that was going to be used to prove to a court--a fucked up system that Sirius worked every day to overturn--that Remus and Sirius should be able to keep him.

They left you with me, and I got to keep you.

But he hadn’t been left with Sirius at all and filing to keep him felt dirty. Even if it might be necessary.

Harry opened the door, Sirius immediately glancing at the clock on the wall to get the time, confirming that it was late. Harry didn’t have his glasses on, sweatpants hanging on his hips, and a Hufflepuff sweatshirt pulled over his head that was a little big on him.

“Did you come to tell me to go to bed?” asked Sirius jokingly

“As long as you don't tell me, I won't say a thing."

“Moons can deal with both of us being cranky tomorrow then…” Sirius said, offering a smiling and leaning forward onto the surface of his desk, after flipping over the document that was definitely not for Harry’s eyes.

“What are you doing?”

“Just some filing.”

“Is it about the court case?” Harry had made his way into the study, taking a seat on the leather chair by Sirius’s bookshelves. The ones that were separate from the library and mostly contained legal texts.

“Don’t worry about that, babe.”

“I’m already worrying about it, so you and Remus telling me not to really isn’t helping.” Harry muttered, picking at a thread of his sweatshirt.

“Is that why you’re up?”

“Mmm…yep. Yes. That’s exactly why I’m up. Just…worrying.” Harry said half-convincingly and Sirius snorted out a laugh. Almost sixteen meant a blatant insistence of not needing to go to bed before midnight. Almost sixteen meant navigating an over-tired teenager who had clearly not gone to sleep and had a tendency to get very weepy when that was the case. Almost sixteen also meant that staying up to talk to his boyfriend through a gifted two-way mirror was the most important thing in the world. Sirius remembered feeling that way. “Do…you think they…they’re mad at me?”

“No one's mad at you, Harry. I promise.”

“Okay, but what happens when everything's set with the ministry? What if they’re just…mad?”

Sirius stood up from behind his desk to walk over to Harry, taking a seat on the ottoman next to his godson’s bare feet. “They won’t be.”

“But what if they are?”

“Then you tell me, and I’ll take care of it. That’s how things work right?” Sirius asked him, catching green eyes, and reaching up to pull the fingernail he was chewing on out of Harry’s mouth, “Just as things have always worked. Someone is being rude to you, or you think they’re mad and you don’t know what to do, you talk to me and Moony and we’ll take care of it.”

“You can’t do that forever you know…fix things.”

“Watch me.” Harry rolled his eyes, but caught himself before his other hand made it into his mouth, “Yeah?”

“I guess.”

Sirius waited, keeping his eyes on Harry, and keeping his hand where it was. Adolescence was just a waiting game, it turned out. Waiting to get taller, waiting for his voice to drop, waiting to be picked up and dropped off, waiting to be old enough to make your own decisions, and waiting to remember what it was like to be young again. Waiting for the world to stop being a series of never-ending questions and start being a place full of magic. Sirius had learned quickly if he just waited…Harry would put pride aside in favor of some answers.

“Why...are they so mad at you? I don’t understand. I’ve tried to, I really have, and…to think how they must be feeling? But I don’t…get why they’re mad at you.”

Sirius smiled sadly, “I…think sometimes, mad is just easier. We’ve talked about that, right?”

“Yeah but I’m a teenager, I'm allowed to get mad at stupid things because hormones," Sirius couldn't help but chuckle, "They're not...and you said it goes away? That you’re supposed to be old and wise and all that and not get mad for no reason?"

“People are imperfect, my love. Including your parents--”

“They’re not my parents.”

“James and Lily,” Sirius corrected, “I’m also imperfect, so is Remus, and…we all make mistakes and it's unfortunate you’re in the crossfire. But we’ll sort it out and it’s far too exhausting to stay mad forever.”

But Harry shook his head, “You’re wrong.”

“Am I?”

“You and Remus were the best things to ever happen to me. That…you’re the perfect people for me. So you’re wrong.”

“I’ll be wrong,” Sirius said softly, Harry’s hand squeezing his own.

I got to keep you.

His kid.

--

Harry stood on the platform in front of the scarlet steam engine, holding onto his trunk as Sirius's arms rested on his shoulders. James and Lily were there too, after a few more missteps over the holiday that were done with the best of intentions. There was some saying about that wasn’t there? That it never ended up well?

It hadn’t.

But Sirius was there, and all Harry had to do was sign a piece of paper saying he wanted to stay with Remus. And Sirius. And that no amount of magic could chance that. Most days, Harry had trouble deciding what kind of tea he wanted for breakfast or choosing the correct answer on a test he definitely should’ve studied more for, but this? Was the easiest decision he had to make in a long while. The paper glowed gold and so did the lining around Harry’s heart that had been drawn tight for weeks.

Harry didn’t know what exactly had happened but had gotten one too many warnings from Sirius to stop asking, Harry James to know it hadn’t been something light. There was still shattered glass that was being picked up, dinner time conversations occasionally halting when a piece was found. All Harry knew now was that he didn’t have to spend a night on strange sheets unless he really wanted to. Everything could happen as he wanted it to, how it was supposed to be.

Harry shifted on his feet and looked up at Sirius, finally feeling ready to leave as he spotted curly brown hair walking towards the train, “I’ll see you in June?”

“Before then.”

“February?”

“Better.”

Harry grinned and turned around giving Sirius a brief hug before anyone saw him, taking a step back away from his godfather. “And…I can call you?”

“Whenever you want, babe. Same as always,” Sirius told him, “And Sunday’s for tea. I’ll be there. Be good, yeah?”

“I know, I know. No skiving off to snog, study before tests, no missing work, got it.”

“I love you.”

“Yeah, I know,” Harry responded, turning away from Sirius’s smiling face to look at James and Lily standing there. I love you definitely wasn’t right. I’ll miss you wasn’t right either. “I’ll…write. I’ll write you?”

“We would love that, Harry,” James said smiling, extending his hand for Harry to slap it as they had been doing for months as hello and goodbye.

“Write us…whenever you want.” Lily added.

Harry still wasn’t sure what to do with her. He had never had a mother before and wasn’t sure he needed one now. Not when everything Mum’s apparently did was already being covered. And…maybe that was the whole point.

It wasn’t a need.

It was going to have to be a want and there was still time for that. Harry had plenty of room in his heart for that.

“I…I’m sorry this didn’t turn out like you hoped,” Harry said before he could stop himself, noises of the platform filling his ears and Sirius’s expression shifting, “But…I kind of told you, I already have parents, and they’re really great. They…make sure I’m polite and turn in my homework and insist I eat vegetables and all that. I…don’t need two more, and I don’t need you. I’m really happy, you know? I’m just fine, more than fine, even. And I'd...be fine if you hadn't shown up. I'd be happy.”

“We know, Harry. It’s okay.”

“No…I mean…I’ve already got parents…but,” Harry paused, “I’ve…never really had godparents before. And...I think I'd like that.”