So God Created Us In His Image, Right? And That’s Cool And All But What If It Turns Out God, Like,

they need to invent a discord you can cuddle through

So god created us in his image, right? And that’s cool and all but what if it turns out god, like, hates his own image??? What then????

Newsweek

Rabbit lost for 120 years found hopping around in the mountains

The long-lost Omiltemi cottontail has been spotted on camera after more than a century, sparking hope for its conservation.

important rabbit news

— Grief, is perhaps the last and final translation of love.

In another world

Dirk doodles… worlds normalest guy

Save me characters that just have something about them. Save me characters that don’t have to be “sunshine coded” as in happy and bubbly but characters that are inexplicably the center of every person’s attention whenever they’re around. They don’t have to want it they don’t even have to enjoy it but everyone who looks at them wants to understand and wants to figure them out. Characters that draw people in with some strange unknowable charisma. Characters that writhe with secrets under their skin. Characters that are bigger than you and me and probably bigger than the world itself. Characters that change lives just by being in them, not always for the better but changed nonetheless. Save me characters that tend to die in the end, ending in one big heat death supernova and leaving an afterimage behind that lasts as long as the story. Maybe even longer. After all, stars still shine after they die, the light has to travel.

first yuri of the year ⭐️ [Fiyero, can you take a picture for us?]

“were you the person who drew dirkjake eating bugs like shrek” - my legacy

before you ask, but this part isnt as relevant: fairy godmother would be aranea, if i had to cast a prince charming it’d be cronus for the shits of it, similarly farquaad is HIC/meenah. thank you for your time

Tips for writing Dirk and Jake?

They're both simpler and goofier than they seem. Dirk and Jake are heavily emotionally oriented, but at the same time their emotions are downplayed by everybody (including themselves!) for the sake of keeping up a "respectable front." They're not very good at it tho. If you keep this logic in mind you'll prolly be okay giving them words to say.

Specially when put together, their quirks play off one another. Dirk is all modern and hyper specific lingo, internet poison, and a tryhard 'street' impression pulled from the internet and god knows what 00's tv serial he cobbled up together all by himself to sound # hashtag # cool.

While Jake speaks like a golden age actor playing a character, on a stage, with a transatlantic accent (this means a mix of american and british lingo that did not truly belong to either culture - it is, from conception to limited use then eventual death, a language made for Prestige Movies and to embellish the telling of Stories.)

Their characters are paired up like this because they naturally contrast with one another. The man from the future / The man of the past, neither of them fully being what they seem.

One thing a lot of people slip up on is the Language thing. Dirk sounds like a guy who's sprinkling hard words into his dialogue to seem smarter, knowledgeable, academic. Whereas Jake has an expansive and peculiar vocabulary (think like Rose's, here), but he doesn't care about 'sounding intelligent' so much as he cares about being LIKED or being charming, so with him it's about pomp and flair. You could say Dirk pretends to be limitlessly reliable while Jake pretends to be "A Himbo", but they know there's a limit to the act.

With both of them carefully crafting a persona they want to project outwards and be remembered by, they tend to adjust to the environment. If there's not a public to perform to, it's gone. Dirk is less playful and more technical-incisive if he's talking to AR and Jake really tones himself down at the end of Act 6 when he's just exhausted of being read wrong.

Them being friends for so long also influences how they speak to one another in contrast of everyone else; in dirk-jake conversations, both of them use a lot of bro-speak deliberately and almost excessively. It's a lot of Bro's & Dude's & Man's that serve to denote bestfriendliness or reassure that they're in the same brainwave.

Also, they cuss a lot, indiscriminately, and to great comedic effect. I see a lot of people being afraid if making Jake Say A Bad Word but this is nothing new to him. He often abruptly cuts off his charming old-timey thing to just sound like a normal regular dude who's gotten frustrated and it's that whiplash that makes the character. Jake can be pretty & abruptly mean if he wants.

Dirk keeps more of a leveled writing voice and syntax, even when he's arguing with himself, favoring readability over tone. He wants to communicate something with his long-ass texts, even if his explanations are too convoluted. When Dirk goes off the rails we're talking about metaphor- Like Dave, he enters a trail of thought and keeps adding to it sometimes, needlessly, as if he doesn't know just when to end a joke. (The "Bounce a coin off that ass" monologue, ex)

While Jake uses asterisks to *narrate his own actions* or EMPHASIZES important parts of his run-on sentences to show importance/tone/frustration BY MAKING THEM BIG. He uses periods to separate sentences more often than commas. When he does use punctuaction he can also exaggerate!!!! Not always, but often enough. If you see it happening too much edit it a little. (Jake also occasionally uses an emoji here and there though its very sparse so its more like a callback to how Jade does it. He learned from her, after all.)

Rereading their pesterlogs w/ each other and then with different partners (like dirk with jane, jake with calliope, how each of them talks to caliborn, etc etc) can help you pick on other useful cues and subtleties. They're generally more amenable and friendly to the girls. Also, dont skip the jake/hal conversations. They're crucial for characterization.

If comparing/contrasting is up to your speed, here are characters whose quirks sound similar to, compound to, or can help you write:

Dirk- Rose, Dave

Jake- Vriska, Jade

TL;DR: "intent" matters a lot to the things Dirk and Jake say, even when the text is riffing off it. Its more useful to think on /why/ they're saying this rather than "does this sound like enough lingo/oldtimey speak", because focusing too much on the latter is gonna make you end up writing nonsense.

(*All screenshots used in this post are from actual pesterlogs in Homestuck)