You Are So Terrifying And Beautiful To Love I Am So Afraid And Yet So Full Of Lust Let Me Call Your Name

I used to feel so deeply for you but now I am confused about the love that I felt about the love that I lost

I used to feel so strong with my heart dancing in fire it never burned out it never lost its desire

I used to feel so passionate like it was only you and me passionate about us passionate about who we could be

Now I feel nothing of the things that I used to feel I stare into your eyes black holes, just as dead as mine

How could we become these deadly boring people? Weren't we the ones which used to breathe through kisses?

How could we lose all of this and slowly become enemies? we stopped to dance in our light we rather start wars in our shadow

How lovely it would be to go back to the art of passion but we buried it our fallen feeling of desire

A letter to a friend I loved...i love. I miss.

I miss u

I miss the talks we had, the loud laughter, the random references

I miss the silence between our talks

I miss how your voice changes while eating something. I miss your way of saying "mhhhm" when you're enjoying your delicious chocolate.

I miss you

I miss you as the person you are

I miss the person I am around you

I miss the person I used to be with you

I miss the friendship we had, because it's a matter of fact, that eventhough we said we would try it one last time, we both agreed to give up of what we had left, without knowing it. I miss the old days.

I miss to listen to your problems, eventhough they were a bit silly sometimes and I did not knew what to say, but they were important to you, so they were important to me, because you were important to me.

I miss the way I've never missed our friendship. I miss the way I've though about you. I miss the excitement I had, by thinking about calling you. I miss the enjoyment I had by talking to you, like to no one else. I miss the way I made you laught and I miss the way you've mad me laught so many times.

I miss the plans we made for our future,eventhough we knew they would never come true, but dreams will be dreams and we lived them in our head.

I miss not missing you.

I miss complaining and overthinking our friendship. I miss fearing of losing you, because that ment I haven't lost this yet. Cuz now it is not you I am writing, but my notebook.

I miss not thinking if i should write you, but just do. I miss our games and inside jokes. I miss Oleg . I miss Oleg a lot. I miss knowing what is going on in your life and I miss letting you know what is going on inside mine. I miss getting mad about you, for no real reason and I miss starting smiling out of nowhere, just because I thought about a funny thing you've said once.

I miss the way you saw me. I miss our conversations and how light and easy they could be. I miss, I hate not being able to write you because...that what we had is in the past and we both seem to have moved on...but still...sometimes you are the only person I want to talk to. I miss the way "sometimes " did not exist. I really miss not missing you.

I miss how you laughted about my really bad jokes. Damn they where bad. I miss falling asleep whit knowing you would still be there. I miss this friendship so badly I can't. It's true, you value things way more, when they are gone.

I hate this so much. I hate that we are kinda in touch, but don't talk at all and if we do, we don't come over some Texts and then everything is dead.

I don't know if we will ever be real friends again. I don't know how you may feel and I really want to know.

I don't know if there will ever be another person with whom I may experience a similar friendship. Well there is somebody I really love but it's not the same we had. And that's what I miss .... the friendship we left behind.

I hate trying to having to distract myself of not thinking about you, especially when it gets late and I don't know what to do. I am haunted by the ghost of you, of my old me, of the person we were and pretended to be.

I miss

empty faces

It is another kind of heartbreak to realize that I still haven’t found the soul I am searching for in the person, I hoped so much would reflect my perception of perfection after spending so much time searching in empty faces and beliving that this one has a heart that would mirror my own Just to see they are just another empty face in the crowd of lost lovers I got lost in as well Only this time I painted their face so it is easier to pretend and hold onto something that isn’t even there It is so tiring to search without finding or find without keeping because even if they leave it wouldn’t be their missing that would hurt but knowing that nothing has changed I am still on my journey through empty faces until finding the other wanderer who searches for a face in so much emptiness as well

melted chocolate in your eyes, a steady fire reflecting your soul, your blushing lips, a bed of a beard, your waterfall hair tangling mine, a velvet smile, an alluring glimpse, my heartbeat in sync with your breath, fast spoken words, soft and sweet, you are mine and I am yours

I love how your eyes shine in the dawn and the inner child you never hide I love the way your fingers play with mine how you kiss my feet, how you bite my toe I love how your lashes frame your eyes and how your sun-kissed face has a golden shine I love how your voice carries a scent of stars how you and I feel like venus and mars I love how I hate to feel your breath at night and how I yet hide in your arms from all the dreams I fight

the inner child you made me save so yours and mine can always play and whoever you shall be in the next year or the ones coming I will always love you with all the strength my heart can offer you leo beauty, my water eyes, I am yours and you are mine

Stay right here I am not going to leave yet Just promise me one thing That you would do the same And stay here until Our feelings collabs I want to feel you close Your head on my chest Counting the beats of my heart Not knowing that with every beat I get closer to fall for you I need to find your heart So I can watch you fall Just like you watch me

Your promises sweet like honey touching my lips filling my soul Let’s see  How long you can keep  your promises of love, respect and security 

I feel trapped by my own heart  Losing my patience by searching your presence  in the fading words you left behind You promised me nothing  but I still feel betrayed Every day I am waiting  falling for you Staring at the world and no clue what to do

“I am going to change, I promise” I never knew that changing could mean leaving Maybe not even you knew Maybe no one could

I saw that; I saw you How you kept your promise of changing How you and your mind drifted away every day a little bit more a little bit more away from me away from staying

I changed to stop you from leaving No matter how similar we may be Our words may sound the same But changing never meant leaving to me

Like I never meant home to you

We think to much

and forget to love instead

You are a beautiful soul  remember that

And if he wants to leave  Let him go Because you can’t hold onto something that's already gone You can’t stop people Neither stop time or stop moving on And you will see Someday you will feel  Awake and alive again Because after all

You are a beautiful soul remember that