Communicatism

Crescent Star, a very normal very safe fusion that nopony needs to worry about.

Anyways, Luna's finally back. Wonder what that will mean for the world.

Oh, I'm sorry, I'm sure that was probably pretty vague!

Well, I'm not really sure how to put it other than that we got mostly cut off from all but a handful of worlds. But uh... well okay actually I'm not really an expert on this science, I'm just kinda projecting thoughts into some of the shards we've got and it seems wherever you're at has been getting the signals! It's like putting a bunch of antenna together and finding a new show in the TV static! But if you don't know how to reconnect to other places than... well I don't have many ideas either. I guess I'll have to keep broadcasting? Maybe you know someone else who could help?

I suppose I'll just have to... monitor this channel and keep in touch from time to time!

Hi there! I hear you're stuck in between universes! As someone currently trying to uh... fix some of my own universe mirrors, would you mind lending a hoof and describing some of what you've seen from over there? It'd be really helpful to see what's going on on the other side while doing this!

Well, I’ve learned things are constantly coming and going! You meet a lot of different creatures and entities, and so many different cultures!

I don’t quite know how to help fix anything though. Could you elaborate?

Tablets?

Season of slightly less guilt for spending money on myself is upon me, and I really need a drawing tablet. Preferably something that can operate without being plugged into both a computer and a wall by a 1 foot cord like I got scammed by in the past. I'm worried my art will never really amount to anything better than what it is on a touchpad and see the circle around me growing better and better, which is good for them, but.... not ideal for my self esteem. Any recommendations?

Part one of four (in theory) of a thing inspired by @zoeyhorse 's big eyed style and silly humor. Honestly not 100% confident of how things came out so apologies if it's a poor showing of the style.

Manually drawing text on a touchpad is awful, honestly I know I should make proper fancy reference sheets for all the students, funfacts and all, but these will at least get them all out there in some capacity. At least enough to maybe inspire an ask or two!

💖

How to Horse Tumblr

Other horses have many friends across the multiverse! How is it so?

Please tell me the secrets. I don't have to actually message people first do I? Why can't they just all come ask ME things first! That seems like a much more sustainable arrangement, in my opinion. There's an open box right there!

Not exactly a great artist, but I'm trying my hand at it. First upload to Tumblr

I wanted to practice something but was feeling really lazy so this came out less than great. Happy explosion day, here's Litter Leader enjoying the fancy magic fireworks.

Dangerous Dreams

Tagged Mature for spoilers and problematic subject matter

You know what? It's my Tumblr I can do what I want with it. But truth be told I don't even know where to start! Contextually there's so much about this to explain it's kind of hard, so this will end up more a stream of consciousness than an organized post, but so be it.

First is the basic premise that this character and much of the art I've done surrounding them is derived from a sort of collaborative writing with my partner, a project that I'm working to fanfic-ify slowly in the background. Obligatory warning that there's some inappropriate relationship dynamics going to be mentioned here. First of which is the dreaded Canon x OC. I joke, I joke, but that's unpopular with some people. The OC in question is Azure Star! Failed Alicorn clone made by some supervillains, technically inbred little disaster, and student at a school designed to fix the problems of a dysfunctional but not entirely hopeless AU Equestria. The canon is the local variant of Twilight Sparkle, who is generally a much less... functional person.

I'll start listing all the ways this horrible ship - which isn't in any way official in-universe at this moment but is set in motion with a horrific inevitability - is something that by all means should not have been pursued but was chosen to be anyways, in no particular order

Twilight is her instructor at the impromptu school to train up diplomats and "heroes". She's not substantially older than Azure, only a few years, but there's still a strange imbalance of power that would make it inappropriate from a modern context, even if nobody cares in the near-feudal society they live in.

Azure was adopted by one of her Biological "parents"/genetic donors (Celestia) after they figured out what she was. This wouldn't be so bad in theory if Celie hadn't used her student as an emotional surrogate daughter to deal with the stress of losing Sunset, who in this universe was all but adopted in everything but paperwork and titles. Being unhealthily emotionally involved in the life of a student that actually still has living, loving parents is definitely on her, but it does leave her mentally screaming while watching her unhealthily attached student get flirted with by her new new kid.

The entire previous point is made more complicated by the fact that, due to AU shenanigans, Twilight never left or made friends, despite the timeline being slightly advanced. She still managed to ascend despite this, through a yet to be uncovered means. This made her unhealthy attachment far worse as it effectively gave her an excuse to stick around the palace indefinitely even well after her mentor realized the mistakes of letting her get so dependent and tried to start pushing her out on her own. This has left her with a general lack of experience with friendships in general, let alone anything more than that.

Azure is already in a committed polyamorous relationship, and basically admitted to flirting with someone else in front of her current partners devoid of shame. Not an open relationship mind you, but one they agreed after that was more democratic and universally inclusive - meaning Azure is effectively tasked with not just the task of seducing an instructor who doesn't care much for socialization in general, but somehow convincing her that her girlfriends are great too and she should join their bizarre coven.

It's worth noting that while the world overall is more friendly to this "herding" behavior and more varied orientations overall, Canterlot, the place they actually live, is one of the more staunchly conservative medieval societies that does not exactly approve of such things, especially from its royalty

Despite this all, they actually have become friends and have enough genuine chemistry that it could theoretically work out, assuming that all the above is addressed. Despite the awkwardness Azure's bluntness has led to her feelings being an open secret, and admitting to flirting wasn't totally rebuffed but softly pushed away with a reminder that they haven't known each other that long and that she'd like to get to know her better before even thinking of anything past being friends. But wait? That's all very weird and maybe problematic, but it's not exactly Toxic, is it? Well that was all the status quo until one vital change, one crucial moment. See Azure had been working on ripping the Nightmare Spirit off of Luna (who is still, presently, in the moon due to the timeline of that whole event shifting slightly) before she even came back, ever since she found out it was a separate entity at all. And despite the odds - she succeeded. Unfortunately, the means used meant she was the perfect living bridge for it to get out of the moon and back into the world, and while she was able to resist and prevent it from sticking with her, it was let loose into the palace and the Royals present failed to capture it before it faded into shadows.

Azure does not know where it went. But I do. Of all the royals present there was a chance for any of them to be vulnerable, but Twilight was the one who failed to resist it completely, who only merely thought they repelled its mental invasion. And that has led to a strange present and a tumultuous future. For while the spirit hasn't been able to take control and cause a total transformation yet, it is able to amplify negative emotions in its unwitting host, and feed off of them to recoup its power.

Since it has taken root poor Twilight has been pushed to the brink of a meltdown with continuous feelings of Insecurity - rooted in issues that existed beforehand. Yet despite this she has grown more friendly, even openly affectionate in a mostly platonic way, with her confused but perhaps too happy to question it student. All because of a toxic feedback loop.

Twilight had confided a great deal of insecurity to her student already. Despite being an Alicorn she didn't feel she really had a clear role or purpose to serve in life, and felt aimless. At the same rate she is boxed in by the expectations of royalty - there are certain things she can and cannot do now, different ways that others treat her, and responsibilities she didn't exactly want to deal with. And while she actually found herself wanting friends and socialization sometimes, she has never been exceptionally good at understanding it.

Azure however has done nothing but fail upward and seemingly succeed at everything she has set out to do since showing up. Helping others on missions, easily making friends, pursuing the political side of being royalty as soon as she had gained it, getting some of Celestia's precious time all to herself, and even pursuing relationships that most would only speak of in whispers with a cavalier openness and fearlessness.

While much of this is admired it's clear that there's also a layer of envy in those feelings. Azure to her side of things is also not entirely honest - she more than admires her mentor as a personal idol and hero, but sees something else in them that hasn't been spoken - a guarantee for the future. While she is still, in her own eyes, an "unfinished" Alicorn Azure intends to and is actively training to rectify that so her parent's don't have to outlive her, but she is acutely aware of the consequences. Beneath her positive demeanor is a deeply traumatized and codependent personality - nothing is so horrifying to her as being alone. Given that she's the only current Immortal within so many years of her that isn't already related to her somehow, Azure doesn't have much choice but to pursue her if she wants to find someone who can truly understand her that she can keep Forever without fear of losing some day. She would do literally anything to somehow secure her eternal affection.

Together these two facts make the foundation of the Nightmare spirit's perfectly toxic natural habitat. By just boosting and loosening up on negative feelings in the right moment it can stick them in a loop of horrible codependency and insecurity that it can feed on, directly or by proxy, pretty much indefinitely. Twilight will never be allowed to feel fully secure in herself in Azure's presence, always comparing herself negatively, a trait that will only be magnified over time as Azure no doubt continues to succeed while she runs in place, getting stronger but never finding something meaningful to do with it. Brief moments of lessened pain together will encourage them to stay close, but only so that the shadow cast is that much bigger. Azure's sheer obsessive willingness to please will be exploited as Twilight's hunger for knowledge and the power to be meaningful is pushed until they're both hard at work to find ways to make her stronger (and a stronger host later) no matter what ethical lines are blurred or crossed. Azure's optimism is kept at bay with always being led on with teases of approval to keep her around and subservient, but never so much as to become confident, leaving her forever hungry and trying to prove herself as "good enough", and turning one of the few threats to the spirit in the future into a dependent lackey that will be unable to stop them when the time finally comes.

For the spirit, this cycle is nothing but a victory. Finally that silly abstract idea of "love" is not a weakness, but a poison to be wielded like a weapon until two of its greatest threats have been reduced into nothing but puppets. And while the conclusion has yet to be written... I can only be certain the climax of this strained loop will be painful for more than just them.

Driving myself mad with recent developments in my silly collaborative Pony story that I long to ramble about. I'm not even building up towards Toxic Yuri at this rate, this is going to be nuclear accident that scars the planet for centuries to come Yuri by the end of it. I'm ready to infodump about my gay little tire fire for hours at any who'd listen.