I've Been Collecting These For A Few Weeks And I NEED MORE

Who the fuck needs Tumblr anymore I'm just going to be looking at lamp posts from now on

Humans are... confusing

Human expressions confuse me a lot of the time so I can’t imagine what it would be like for an alien

Human: *drops something* oh fuck me! Alien: *blushes* Um I… umm… Human: Oh no no! Sorry! That’s just an expression we say! I don’t want you to actually… ya know *laughs* Alien: *smiles* Phew! I thought you actually wanted me to engage in sexual activities with you which worried me as I find the fleshy and hairless human form to be really quite repulsive. My mistake! Human: …cheers

Insult names to use instead of "idiot,"

None of these are actually meant to be hateful, if any of these have truely offensive meanings (such as the r word) that I was unaware of, please tell me so I can remove it! Tried to avoid cursing, but it contains some!

Jerk

Ass-hat

Dumb-dumb

Dummy

Doofus

Dork

Stupid

Moron

Fool

Nincompoop

Oaf

Ninny

Blockhead

Dunce

Imbecile

Jack-ass

Dope

Nit-wit

Numbskull

Simpleton

Twit

Birdbrain

Bonehead

Buffoon

Dullard

Half-wit

Knucklehead

Ignoramus

Dingbat

Dumbbell

Loser

Addlepate

Muttonhead

Cretin

Goon

Pea Brain

Dull Pencil

Mole Rat

Turd

Goncharov (1973)

I know everyone talks about Ice Pick Joe, but let’s be real, that scene where he finally kills Gil “the Grill” McGilicuddy? Brian Dennehy STOLE IT.

“The best kind of people are the ones who come into your life, and make you see the sun where you once saw clouds. The people who believe in you so much, you start to believe in you too. The people who love you, simply for being you.”

— Unknown

“You can’t truly call yourself “peaceful” unless you are capable of great violence. If you’re not capable of violence, you’re not peaceful, you’re harmless. A very important distinction. ” Our first contacts were harmless, those met later couldn’t tell the difference.

hmmm

Steve: i’m by section

Steve: i’m buy

Steve: i’m bicentennial

Sam: it’s okay, take your time

Steve:

Steve: bucky