Gotta Admit, I'm Impressed With Their Dedication To The Bit

Hydra Agent: I lured you all to my lair because I crave the deadliest game-

Bucky: [nodding] Knife monopoly

Sam:

Sharon:

Hydra Agent: I was actually going to hunt you all for sport, but now I’m interested in whatever knife monopoly is.

Since I can’t find the original posts (and if anyone can, let me know) I’ll just post this image to show people, who may not know, where all this “humans are space orcs” stuff started. 

If you’re not amazed by the stars on a clear night then we won’t work.

Bucky: you used to wear newspapers in your shoes Steve: *heart eyes* can’t read that in a museum Sam: seriously?? right in front of my salad???

Mother Earth: And to you, Human, I shall give you great Endurance and a thick skin, remarkable mimicry and visual tracking skills, strong inner bones which heal back even stronger when broken, an omnivorous diet with acute palates and resistance to most poisons, a pack organization, skin-stealing skills and the ability to throw things with ease and accuracy using your upper limbs, so you shall reign the hot savannahs and deserts as the greatest pursuit predator ever. Also as primates you shall not be bound to mating seasons and with your strong self-healing instincts and great adaptability, you shall rise and be numerous as ever.

Human: Mkay but what's that nice little red fruit outta there

Mother Earth: ... That's a pepper. Do not eat it, as it contains capsaicin, and you're still a mammal. This is a fruit for the birds.

Human: But it look tasty

Mother Earth: I mean, unless you want to be curling yourself down on utter pain, you should not...

Human: *already biting it* tast y

Mother Earth: HUMAN PLEASE STOP--

Human: *already crying, curling themself up down and shedding tears of pain*

Mother Earth: I told you. Stay away from that fruit

Human: *takes another bite despite the pain*

Mother Earth: What the everloving Big Bang, HUMAN PLEASE STOP IT'S TO YOUR OWN GOOD

Human: *crying* T A S T YYYY

Mother Earth: *concerned motherworld noises*

Kim dokja is currently trying a pick up line on Yoo Jonghyuk

Kim dokja : are you http?

Kim dokja:because without you I'm ://

Yoo Jonghyuk, eyes wide: how-

Han Sooyoung, emerging from the bushes nearby: HOW THE FRICK DID YOU JUST SAY THAT OUT LOUD

Rest well, ma'am

Space Australia

This trend has probably died out, but screw it I’m gonna make this. It’s been well established that Humans could probably have a lot of weird adaptations that Aliens just... don’t have. The aliens get weirded out by humans a lot, especially when it comes to sneezing.

Human: *sneezes*

Alien: WHAT IN THE NAME OF LORELIAK WAS THAT?

Human: oh, just my allergies

Alien: What are... Alla-gees?

Human: oh, they’re just *VIOLENT SNEEZE* when your body thinks that something—like this dust— is a virus and tries to get rid of it. Humans sneeze all the time.

Alien: dust can make humans sick!

Human: ah, AH, *makes a stupid face*

Alien: AGHAJSKDLDKS

Human: nope. Not gonna sneeze.

——

Alien: Then, we’ll—

Human A:*tiny, delicate, high-pitched “ah-choo”

Other humans: *giggle at the sound*

Human A: *tiny sneeze*

Alien: um... A? Why are you making that sound?

Human B: omg their sneeze is so cute.

Alien: bodily protection against illness is... cute???

—

Human A sitting at a table with her dad: Alien, meet my dad

Alien: nice to meet you, conceiver of human A

Human A’s Dad: *sneezes so hard he hits his head on the table*

Alien: ... What?