The Vast

A little comic for Mermay

little kids make me laugh. i was at a party yesterday and a kid was there and she noticed that i have a long straight cut along the length of my thumb and asked about it, so i told her it was a cat scratch, almost healed, didn't hurt. and then she was sorta staring and touching it for a bit and went "you had bone surgery. because there were termites in your bones."

so i played along and went "oh man, i hope they got em all!" and she went "no. they put in more." lmao

i love that simon fairchild and mike crew have the exact same sense of humor, but simon's obviously way further into it than mike. mike will give you some tea and have a civil conversation with you, you really have to push him to get him to toss you into the vast. with simon, your fate is entirely dependant on how much fun he has talking to you. and they both think your fear is hilarious.

ranking the best things I have heard surgeons say mid-surgery:

1. "Five second rule!" while scrubbed, after dropping a sterile scalpel on the floor (no they did NOT pick it up again but I swear everyone's buttholes puckered)

2. (spoken during the closing of a particularly long and difficult case) "Nurse - my tunes." :heavy metal starts blasting:

3. Gently to a fretful patient, pre-anaesthesia: "It's going to be okay. I promise, I've dealt with worse." As soon as the patient is unconscious: "This is literally the worst thing I've ever seen."

4. [okay this one was a med student] "Wowwww, that's so gross!!" Reg: "Please remember that [patient] is awake for this procedure." Student to patient: "Oh my god. I am so sorry, that was really unprofessional - " Patient, cheerfully, also engrossed with what's happening inside them on the screen: "Nah - it's, like, super gross, right?"

5. [another procedure where the patient couldn't be put under GA] Patient: *starts singing country roads midway through the procedure* Surgeon: *shrugs and joins in with surprisingly good harmony*

Was anyone gonna tell me that Simon Fairchild from the Magnus Archives and Dracula from re:dracula are voiced by the same person

you know the hyperfixations bad when you go outside and see clouds and mutter to yourself 'this is just like when simon fairchild-'

thunderstorm warning tonight? thats- thats just like mike crew guys

I wanted to mess around with stamp textures and now we're here

“Can I have a cigarette?” The Magnus Archives is a horror anthology audio drama by Rusty Quill, written by Jonathan Sims. It’s probably one of my favourite podcasts so I decided to make an animated trailer for the very first episode, Anglerfish All credit goes to the staff at Rusty Quill

i really like the little detail that the fairchilds aren't a real family, but rather just a name, whereas the lukases are a biological family, but deeply disconnected from each other. the vast sees no inherent value in names, they hold no meaning and can be given away like a gift to anyone it wants to mark. the lonely sees no value in family bonds, they can be severed at any indication of disloyalty, but are still preferable to chosen bonds.

ok ok, so, I just kind of realised that Simon Fairchild is older than planes right? so, can you imagine how excited he was when they were invented? he felt the fresh fear of the wright brothers for those first 12 seconds and went insane.

OR, alternatively, he invented the aeroplane because he was bored of just throwing people from cliffs

ohmygod. he was absolutely fucking ecstatic. overwhelmed with joy. best day of his life. he would force every other avatar onto a plane immediately