[Imagr Description From Alt Text: Tags Reading “#vote For Miriel And Her Autistic Scientist Swag”,

Hi everyone, we’re doing this again! The not-on-this-hellsite mascot poll is happening, and we’re encouraging people to vote for our favorite non-binary acorn! Like last time, we’ll post an art piece we’ve done for everyone who votes.

Tumblr people, can I ask something weird? Can I ask you to vote in a popular tournament poll…. Not on this hellsite? 🥺👉👈

suny.edu

Mascot Madness - SUNY

SUNY Mascot Madness is the battle to decide New York's favorite college mascot.

My school’s mascot is Oakie the Acorn, and they’re probably the Tumblr-est mascot you could think of.

I mean, they’re an acorn for goodness’ sake, they’re officially non-binary, and they’re all about sustainability. The school they represent is also very tumblr- SUNY ESF is a school dedicated to saving the Earth, and its student culture makes it a place where the genders are queer and the neuros are divergent :) People just stop to stare at a weird mushroom or interesting insect all the time here, and if someone spots them, instead of ridicule, you’ll probably have two people staring.

In conclusion, vote for Oakie!

“The Lives in Time of Katherine Kaye”

A silly story about my silly OCs! (But there is also Drama and Angst!) I’m posting this in case anyone has heard something about my soulless mad scientist and her chaos-gremlin younger self and wants to know more, or just for anyone who may happen to be interested lol.

This is kinda a draft/summary of the story so far and as such, it’s a mess, but it’s still very long so I’ve put it under a readmore! (TW for (fictional/fantastical) medical stuff, medical procedures without consent, self-harm, internalized ableism of the anti-neurodivergent variety, identity confusion, and child harm/endangerment)

Some characters and a little worldbuilding, before the story gets started:

Beastfolk/Auracai (a weird fantasy race I made up that’s kind of like elves crossed with catpeople):

Beastfolk age at about half the rate of humans and look like normal humans, but with semi-retractable claws, thin catlike tails, red eyes, and sharpened canines.

“Beastfolk” is what humans call them, referencing their “animal” traits. They call themselves Auracai (this is both singular and plural)

They’re originally from another dimension that contacts the human world (the main story’s world) only occasionally - essentially rare but not unheard of immigrants in this world. 

Sometimes people end up in the wrong world by accident, without a way to get home, as travel between worlds is more “randomly/accidentally slipping through the cracks” than intentional, reliable travel.

Beastfolk can sense souls when in direct contact with someone, humans can’t. 

Katherine Kaye (the main character/characters)

2 versions of her in the story, the emotionless mad scientist adult and the adolescent little chaos gremlin

Auracai/Beastfolk

Has Autism + ADHD + Anxiety

has a much older brother, Theodore, who’s been taking care of them since they ended up in the human world together

KT (the adolescent chaos gremlin version of Katherine)

28 (equivalent of 14)

Mischievous streak

A prankster

Really intense emotions, prone to overreacting

Senior in high school because of weird aging

Amateur singer/songwriter/musician and this is a major part of her personality

goes by KT because “it’s like ‘Katie,’ but cooler!”

Both a STEM nerd and an artist

Dreams of having an impact on the world, both of changing things for the better and of being cool and famous

Self-perception swings with her moods: often confident to the point of arrogance or overconfidence, but during a breakdown she’s full of self-loathing and shame.

Wants to travel, explore, and live a somewhat adventurous life; an ordinary office job would never satisfy her. Boring AF and a total waste of her potential.

Pigtails/twin tails

Likes to act cute to get what she wants

Dr. Kaye (the soulless mad scientist/adult version of Katherine)

Removed her own soul (heart/emotions/creativity/etc.) in an experimental process, which she tested on herself in a frustrated attempt to prove herself and to stop having such intense mood swings + be more productive and “better” without her emotional overreactions.

Ended up getting stuck in the past because she was researching interdimensional travel in an attempt to find a reliable way to get back and forth between the human world and the Auracai world (in this story time travel creates a new timeline/slightly different reality)

creepy ever-present smile (this was a form of masking and a coping mechanism, and remains a habit)

egotistical and doesn’t really realize the extent of it: she thinks that without a soul she’s become perfectly logical and efficient and immune to emotional biases. (This is revealed to be untrue when she has to reevaluate the idea that her current “emotionless” state is an improvement.)

now has really limited emotional range and is coldly logical most of the time

still has a few common emotional states though: excited/passionate/enthusiastic about her work, frustrated/annoyed/exasperated with people who are “not smart enough to see her vision” or “keep getting in the way,” amused at others’ incompetence or at messing with people, and a state of discomfort/guilt/concern about what she’s lost and what things have come to that is usually easily repressed and ignored, triggered by reminders of who she used to be

Really any emotion she feels is almost always mild enough to easily ignore.

Started promoting her soul-removal procedure as a “therapy” for anxiety, depression, various other mood disorders and emotional issues, and autism-related intense mood swings.

tends to dismiss other people as running on “mere irrational emotion”

Age: ~80s (early 40s) (She basically has a midlife crisis after getting stuck in the past lol)

she doesn’t tend to go by her first name and absolutely refuses to answer to the nickname “KT,” even from Ted.

almost completely lost her creative, playful side. No interest in anything artistic, including the music she used to love. “Fun” is not only unnecessary, but largely impossible for her, and anything involving conveying or coping with emotions? Forget it.

KT’s brother/guardian: Theodore Kaye

Perpetually exhausted, at the end of his rope

Nicknamed Ted, rarely goes by his full name Theodore

~ 50 (equivalent of 25)

Responsible because he has to be

Introverted

Low energy

Autistic (I love giving everyone the ‘tism lol)

Loyal to his sister, has a special connection with the one person who was there for him both before and after getting stuck in a different world

The story so far:

KT sees something about Dr. Kaye in the news and it mentions that she’s Beastfolk, which makes KT think that maybe she and Ted have a relative they didn’t know about. So KT goes on a bit of a wild goose chase trying to contact this person who might just be someone who happens to have the same last name. They meet, and Dr. Kaye explains the time stuff. Ted is looking for help and Dr. Kaye is like “oh yeah should probably do that, younger me will probably be a great collaborator when she’s a little older.” Ted gets the feeling that something is off about Dr. Kaye, but kinda doesn’t want to look a gift horse in the mouth. Clearly, this is his sister, or a version of her anyway, and although KT is a prankster, she’s a good kid. It’d totally be fine to trust her with… herself. Right? Right?

Time passes, Dr. Kaye recommends KT books, KT gets increasingly curious about Dr. Kaye’s weirder habits. She plays pranks on her, thinking her future self will laugh. She’d laugh. Dr. Kaye pretends to be amused the first time, then doesn’t react at all. She doesn’t react to a lot of things, actually, seeming to have no interest in much of anything, not caring about the things KT has liked her entire life. Something must have happened to her in the future that she refuses to discuss in order to create this weird disconnect, right? 

Meanwhile this entire time Dr. Kaye has just been… watching KT be herself, which causes her a slight, odd feeling of discomfort that she can’t seem to explain. 

Beastfolk, unlike humans, can sense someone’s soul when in direct contact with them. Dr. Kaye is careful to avoid touching people and not make it weird, a habit she formed before getting stuck in the past in order to avoid making other Beastfolk uncomfortable with her soullessness, and has become more important now that she’s stuck in the past and is attempting to hide her lack of a soul.  She also usually locks her bedroom door at night, but one night the door is accidentally left unlocked, and KT notices and tries to play a prank by putting a fake bug in Dr. Kaye’s bed while she’s asleep. She touched Dr. Kaye by accident  - she didn’t really mean to violate her boundaries, but she made the necessary contact and what she sensed was terrifying. 

KT: *screams*

Kaye: *wakes up confused* what the hell are you doing???

KT: *too scared to react*

Kaye: I forgot to lock the door, didn’t I? And now you’re in my room staring at me like a deer in headlights. Just what do you think you’re doing?!? 

KT: I, uh, it was just a prank, I didn’t mean to wake you up, you- your soul…

Kaye: *finds the fake bug* you touched me, didn’t you, as you were messing around trying to plant this ridiculous plastic bug for me to find in the morning… and I suppose I should explain things now that the cat is out of the bag, shouldn’t I? 

She explains to KT about removing her soul and KT is horrified, but even more fascinated. She wants to know more, even though she also wants to run very fast in the opposite direction, and her other self is happy to explain.

KT: *holding Dr. Kaye’s hand, still fascinated by the strange emptiness inside of her* Does… does it hurt? Not having a soul, I mean…

Dr. Kaye: It doesn’t hurt anymore… but it did, at first. I won’t lie to you, removing it was… an extremely painful process. Of course, in most cases it’s done under anesthesia… though I obviously didn’t have that option. After the procedure, there’s definitely some pain, some lingering soreness, which is rather unresponsive to painkillers, but the worst of it fades naturally fairly quickly, and in a few weeks it’s entirely gone.  There’s also a certain sense of emptiness, afterwards… it feels like something is missing deep inside of you, which I suppose is true, but it’s a feeling I didn’t find it hard to get used to. That empty feeling never truly goes away, but it’s distressing at first mostly because it’s disconcerting, rather than being painful. It’s something I can sense even now, if I’m thinking about it, but I no longer find it bothersome, and I haven’t for a long time. 

KT: That… kinda makes sense? And you said you don’t really feel emotions anymore? 

Dr. Kaye: Yes, and that’s been an immense relief. No more anxiety, no more meltdowns. 

KT: … no more happiness, though? 

Dr. Kaye: I suppose you could say that… but I would say that might simply be the cost of being free of emotional bias. I do find I sometimes experience mild emotion-like states… I’ve found it unpleasant to be interrupted while I’m working, for example… but such experiences are transient and low in intensity, and as such they are easily dismissed. 

Dr. Kaye then explains her plans to republish her discoveries in this timeline and promote her soul-removal procedure as a “therapy” for a variety of emotional problems, as she did in her own time. KT, understandably, freaks out further. 

Meanwhile Ted starts realizing that something is deeply wrong with Dr. Kaye and wants his sister back. Eventually Dr. Kaye decides her kid self needs her “treatment” a little early because she keeps “being difficult,” as well as wanting to spare her younger self the suffering of having to live with her emotional overreactions. She tries to figure out the best way to present this to KT so she’ll agree to undergo the procedure willingly, but also prepares to do it by force if necessary, convinced that she knows what’s best for them. KT asks Dr. Kaye about her regrets, which with everything makes the repressed issues come back to the forefront. As she tries to say she regrets nothing and to ask KT to follow in her footsteps, these words somehow seem like a lie. KT is horrified, but her screaming and freaking out just solidifies in Dr. Kaye’s mind that she’s overreacting. She lets KT wear out her panic until she breaks down in despairing tears and states that if KT doesn’t stop resisting, she will force her. 

“KT, listen to me. I’m you. I know what’s best for us. This is for your own good. Now, you can be good and listen to reason, or you can keep fighting and I will have to forcibly sedate you. Either way, when you wake up you won’t have to be sad and scared like this ever again. The pain you might feel now will be nothing compared to all the suffering I’m sparing you.” “W… will… I’m never going play pranks or sing or play music or draw or play pretend ever again will I… but I guess I have to grow up and give that stupid stuff up anyway… I… I have to grow up faster like you and stop that nonsense…”

Dr. Kaye realizes in that moment that she hasn’t done a single creative thing, hasn’t hummed a tune, doodled in the margins of a notebook, made up stories to fall asleep to, anything, since the day she cut out her soul. Is that worthless, or is that something she’s subconsciously missed for a very long time? She remembers that cutting out her own soul was originally an act of desperation and self-hate. She reconsiders everything.

 Meanwhile KT is escaping. She runs home to Ted and cries in his arms. Dr. Kaye realizes that she doesn’t actually want KT to end up like her, and tries to apologize for everything, but is pushed away by Ted. Not wanting to waste this chance to tell her past self what she wishes she’d known, she disappears, but begins to write a diary/memoir of all the regrets she’d never let herself “waste time” dwelling on and all the useful life things she knows from experience that were hard or impossible to find in books. She leaves it for KT one day, around the time of KT’s high school graduation, and KT reads it and tries to find her again. Despite Ted’s deep distrust of Dr. Kaye, they reconnect, originally through email because Ted understandably doesn’t want Dr. Kaye anywhere near his sister. KT really wants to apprentice under Dr. Kaye, as working and training under an experienced mentor is common practice for young people in the Auracai world, and she argues with Ted about it. 

“I thought you really wanted to go to a human university? Wasn’t that your big dream?” “Well kinda, but that was before I met Dr. Kaye! She’d be the perfect mentor because she’s doing so many things and they’re all the things I’m interested in!!!” “Are you completely forgetting that she tried to take your soul?!?? As far as I’m concerned, she’s unstable and dangerous.” “Okay yeah maybe she’s a little unstable but she wouldn’t be dangerous at all to me, she didn’t take my soul because she actually listens to me, remember?” “Katherine. Stop for a moment and listen to yourself. I can’t believe this is a conversation we even need to have.” “I’m trying to listen to myself, that’s kinda the whole point! ;) Someone keeps saying it’s a bad idea!” (KT doesn’t consider herself and Dr. Kaye to be fully one and the same the way Dr. Kaye does, but the joke was far too good for KT to pass up.) “You know what I meant, and it did not involve the potential future you that’s a soulless lunatic!” 

Dr. Kaye starts asking KT for advice on moral and emotional matters, and KT feels needed. Ted begins to relax a little, though he still really doesn’t trust her. Dr. Kaye invites KT to join her on some kind of research trip, and KT sneaks away to do so against Ted’s orders. He is livid with her… but it is a little reassuring that she’s quite unharmed and had a good time. Eventually Ted’s attitude of “I am not letting you walk to your death” softens into “I’m not sure if I can stop you, and it’s really on you if you get hurt after I tried to stop you, but please text me every night with an update on your latest song or art project or whatever or just something about your day, something that’s you, so I know you’re okay.” So KT gets her apprenticeship, and the Katherines end up forming a sort of symbiotic relationship, with Dr. Kaye acting as a mentor, guardian, and voice of reason to KT, and KT acting as Dr. Kaye’s heart and soul and conscience. Dr. Kaye is still soulless but is starting to come to terms with it now… not exactly “okay” but no longer ignoring that there was a loss and more willing to listen to others or at least to her kid self. Although she also likes to say that if she regained her former emotional range now, she’d probably have a heart attack… especially when KT is causing trouble.

I feel it would be helpful to share this article I found by @urbancripple regarding the correct usage of the accessible stall in a public restroom; if you don’t need the accessible stall, you shouldn’t use it, even if the others are all full. As an able-bodied person, I am ashamed to not have been aware of this, and I wanted to spread the message.

urbancripple.com

If the Accessible Stall is the Only One Available, Should I Use It?

I’m abled, and I was always taught that if the other stalls are free, to use those, but if there’s a long line to help it move faster by usi

The author has answered other questions regarding needing accessible restrooms and further clarified that the need for the accessible stall or accessible restroom doesn’t have to be because of a mobility issue, but it does have to be a need rather than a matter of convenience. Here are links to the other questions and answers about this:

Using the accessible stall to avoid an accident

When the only gender-neutral restroom is the accessible one

Using the accessible restroom for sensory sensitivity

Just one stall in the men’s room

Player Character Support Group!

I’m dropping a somewhat old crossover fanfic of mine here and running lol

It’s an Undertale/Deltarune/Little Nightmares/Hollow Knight fanfic about a group of video game characters who are aware that their lives are video games (similar premise to Wreck-it Ralph) and the struggles of the player characters who go through all kinds of nonsense at the players’ whims.

This is also a crack fic chock-full of personal headcanons! Also, I’m putting it out here but I don’t promise quality lol. - Katlyn

(edit: now on AO3!)

(Here’s the Google doc I originally linked)

Google Docs

Player Character Support Group!

(Also: I’m ignoring Very Little Nightmares because I haven’t played it. Sorry to any Very Little Nightmares fans.)

@ship-bracket FYI: I have more about my OCs here! (I did not post more because of pressure so much as this helped me overcome the feeling of “but it’s cringe”)

S9 Round 1*

More than foils

cw: soulless character, identity confusion

They’re narrative foils, they’re alternate selves, and they’re intergenerational BFFs. A lost her soul long ago in an attempt to stop being overly emotional, and is now cold and heartless, having convinced herself that she’s better off without her irrational emotions. A is logical, efficient, and solitary, having lost her need for connection and the joy she used to find in life. Then she meets an adolescent version of herself, B, whose soul and emotions are intact, and has to reconsider everything. In some ways the two are polar opposites, yet in others they’re exactly alike. B is lively, caring, fun-loving, and always overreacting. Both of them are brilliant yet reckless, searching for new knowledge without regard for safety or sanity.

B tries to steer A towards morally better choices, knowing that she’s the only one A will listen to, and she grows to admire A despite her flaws, eventually coming to love her like family. A has become selfish and uncaring towards others, but to her, B is not “others,” but the soulful, complete version of herself. A considers herself no longer capable of love, but B becomes everything to her, valued above even her own life. They form a sort of symbiotic relationship, with A acting as a mentor, guardian, and voice of reason to B, and B acting as A’s heart and soul and conscience. In many ways, they catalyze each other’s character development… but they also enable each other’s craziness.

Birdsong

cw: murder mention

She's a woman who exists beyond normal boundaries of time & space, who's somehow both a ghost and the reincarnation of her own great-uncle. He's the detective investigating her murder, and was somehow destined to help her long before he ever knew she existed. They've never met while alive, but they both can't stop haunting each other all the same.

The detective and the ghost keep circling each other throughout time loops and dreams, where both of them seem eternally trapped in the same series of rooms. The woman might be trying to guide the detective to the right path, or she might be a vengeful corrupted soul keeping him stuck forever. The detective might be stumbling closer to a way for both of them to escape, with the ghost ascending past her current status -- or he might somehow be her murderer, thanks to the time loop they've both entered. Neither of them seem to have the answers yet, but there is the lingering possibility that the only way for them to move past their current state is to become a part of the very environment they can't leave.

*Ship does not have to be romantic.

Petition: Upholding Plural Rights and Plural Voices

Change.org

Petition to Address Ableist and Sanist Content at the ISSTD Conference and McLean Hospital

Can you spare a minute to help this campaign?

The International Society for the Study of Trauma and Dissociation (ISSTD)  recently had a panel conference on “DID and social media,” featuring harmful and offensive content denouncing self-diagnosis and spreading the narrative that most systems online are faking it for the attention. In this conference, they showed footage of several Systems, without their consent, in order to publicly shame them and use them as examples of the “Imitative DID” that they claimed was rampant online. As a non-disordered System, we stand with those with DID and against those who would spread harmful claims that a majority of Plurals are lying about their Plurality for online clout.

This petition was created by The Plural Association, an organization created by and for Plurals, including those with professionally diagnosed DID.

The Plural Association Nonprofit

The Plural Association Nonprofit

The first and so far only, grassroots and peer-led, registered nonprofit and warmline for people with dissociative identity disorder & all o

If you wish to donate, donate to The Plural Association. DO NOT DONATE TO CHANGE.ORG! THEY DO NOT PUT YOUR MONEY TOWARDS THE PETITION YOU SIGNED!!!

Thanks to @nervoussaladbard for not only voting and reblogging, but sharing to a Discord server to get more support! In my opinion this gets two art things :)

Here’s one, a dragon I doodled in my notebook

i don't think people take me too serious when i say i'm legally blind. Like, guys I am legally never allowed to drive, I need assistance with a lot of stuff because I can't see. People both irl and online tend to be like "oh but you're not THAT BAD OFF" it's not a thing of whether my eyes are "that bad off" it doesn't matter, they're still blind. i still use magnifying and screen readers. i'm learning braille because my eyes are getting progressively worse and I'd like to be able to still read.

I may not be totally blind, but that's the thing, a lot of blind people AREN'T Totally blind. Blindness is a spectrum. and i don't think a lot of people realize that. And I'm just as valid in my blindness as someone on the spectrum with better eyesight than me, or someone with worse.

(This is OK to reblog. I hope that sighted people who might read this really get it into their heads that blindness is a spectrum...)