I Have Been Laughing So Hard I Cannot Breathe For Several Minutes. Get Off Of Tumblr Google It Isnt Good

daisy: i invited you here because i crave the deadliest game tim, nodding: knife monopoly. daisy: i was actually gonna hunt you down for sport, but now i'm really interested in whatever knife monopoly is.

What was your favorite Daniel Radcliffe moment on the pod?

I love big coat and scarf michael as much as the next guy but you have to remember that sannikov land is canonically warm! It’s a jungle! He went through that door with the warm winter clothes in a backpack! Sure, it should have been cold, but that’s the funny bit about the Spiral: it defies “should” at every turn. That said, funny spirally scarves are fun as hell to draw, just probably not canonically accurate (at least as much as any visual representation of mag 101 can be canonically accurate)

As a left handed person they’re actually the worst. I went to great lengths to avoid sitting in them and sometimes still got stuck with one. They do make left handed ones but they’re pretty rare and also… not that great

Also the lockers are real

hey Americans?

what the fuck is this? this isn't real right. it's made up for tv like those metal lockers

I love how tumblr holidays are like. The ides of march. I wanna do statistics on how many people post on the ides of march versus, like, valentines day. Or christmas

What do you MEAN you don't write to your mom about your murders what kind of shit murderer are you

He’s the one that made that “tma fears as cats” image set

If Gerry was the Archivist he would make a slideshow presentation full of 2015 memes to explain the fears to his assistants

Back with more Michael angst!

The Distortion hates cold temperatures. It didn't used to, but then it became Michael. Typically, the Distortion takes whatever form it likes, though the pattern of something-that-looks-like-Michael is one of the easiest, the least complex. (It's very complex, actually, but Michael Shelley was so good at being this one specific human that, if the Distortion wants to look like something other than a door, that pattern is so close to hand.) But the instincts of Michael are interwoven into the instincts of this endless Concept, and when it's cold, the Distortion is reminded of Russia. It's reminded of a place that doesn't exist. It's reminded of a map. It's reminded of words, that he wouldn't die if he was careful. And he was careful, and he hadn't died. But what happened was worse. It remembers the last time he was betrayed before he became betrayal.

And somehow, lost in all the memories of something that both is and is not itself, the Distortion finds itself wearing a heavy coat and scarf, in muted earthy browns and greens so unlike its preferred aesthetic. Sometimes, it finds that it's crying something that could arguably pass for tears. It never quite remembers how it got to this shape.

That simply cannot do. So it avoids winters and cold temperatures and Russia. Or at the very least, it leaves the door outside, and hides inside where temperature and space mean as much as time and colour and truth.

Found a post i saved a screenshot of from another platform ages ago (this particular one went into my photos in april 2022 from insta apparently. It had about 60k notes at the time)

Team “not actually oblivious to flirting, just terrified of appearing presumptuous” represent.

before the poll, a quick definition of terms:

"mutual" - you found this post from a mutual (on their blog or your dash) "following" - you found this post from someone you're following, but who isn't following you "random" - you found this by scrolling through someone's blog, who you don't follow. this includes people following you "For You" - you found this on the For You page "recommended" - you found this in a "Check out these blogs" popup, or a "recommended" post when looking at a different post "other" - you found this post some other way. comment how? "reblog ✅" - you're going to reblog, queue, or schedule this post "reblog ❌" - you're NOT going to reblog, queue, or schedule this post

with that out of the way: