Tim: I Want To Tell Bruce That I'm Queer But I Just Don't Know How He'll Handle It. How Could He Possibly

I know this is off topic but the cup!

Also I love this whole conversation and I need more

Yea I like truth serum Bruce Wayne but what I really want is truth serum Bruce Wayne that makes him say the first thing he thinks. No filter. Meaning he’s either just roasting the hell out of himself the whole time or being genuine

Bruce: [sips his too hot coffee] “try waiting a minute you fucking moron”

Bruce: [nearly drops phone] “almost ten years of ninja training and you can’t even tell”

Bruce: [eating his breakfast]

Tim: “hey Bruce, still having side effects?”

Bruce: [looks up] “they’re only side effects if I squint, otherwises I just seem sarcastic and cynical”

Dick: [takes a selfie with Bruce] “what do you think?”

Bruce: “we look like shit”

Dick: “yea, we do look like shit” [deletes photo]

Bruce: [steps in water wearing socks] “I hate being alive, it’s not worth it anymore if this is the trial I have to face”

Alfred: “just take off your socks”

Bruce: “I’ll take you off my will”

Damian: “I wished you leave me alone”

Bruce: “and I wish I knew how to communicate with you properly”

Damian: “yea, because I’m so difficult”

Bruce: “because I love you and I want to be the father you deserve”

Jason: “I fucking hate you!”

Bruce: “same. Wanna make a club?”

Jason: “… wait can we?”

Bruce: “see Jason’s got more self control than me, because if I killed somebody then I’d just kill everybody. Equality, am I right?”

Bruce: “god, I’d wish you’d kids stop stressing me out”

Tim: “well sorry we can’t be perfect”

Bruce: “who said you aren’t perfect? I love all of you so much I feel like I can’t breath sometimes”

Clark: [wearing a new dress shirt]

Bruce: “you could get it”

Clark: “what?”

Bruce: “I said what I said”

Maybe I'm just aro, but I always saw the BatCat ship as almost platonic. (Maybe/kinda/sorta friends with benefits?) They mutually beard each other from creeps, golddiggers, and nosy friends/family.

Ex. 1

Bruce: *calls Selina* Gala on Saturday. I need a plus one. I'm sick of airheads.

Selina: Gimme the time and what color dress you think would work best. I'll meet you at your place.

Ex. 2

Selina: Hey, can I use your picture and claim you're my boyfriend to scare off assholes at the bar?

Bruce: Go for it. Call me and I'll tell at them, too.

Ex. 3

Bruce: *leaves meeting* I have a previous engagement.

Clark: Does it involve a certain Cat? ;)

Bruce: Quit prying, its private

Hal: Sure thing, Spooky. You gonna spend the whole time in bed? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Bruce: *glares* I just might.

~Later, at Selina's apartment~

Bruce: *in Selina's bed, dead to the world, having the best nap he's had since becoming a dad*

Selina: *on the couch, with a book and a glass of wine*

Yes Yes Yes

Okay see THIS I do love one hundred percent

I like Selina and I like Bruce, and I love them having these sorts of interactions I just don’t like them as a romantic couple all that much

But this?

*Chef’s Kiss*

I like to think Bruce randomly pops up ninja style very frequently in his civilian life because I do that and in collage I scared a lot of people

Just going into an elevator and BOOM Bruce Wayne??? And he’s like, “sup”

Bruce Wayne talking to a group at a gala and suddenly he’s just gone?

Bruce standing right there when you close the refrigerator, “hey Bruce” like yea, he just does that

Who is the best animated Batman? Can the Supermen convince you that it's theirs? (Alt: Who is the most whipped animated Superman?)

Bruce fall in love

Jim Gordon: do you realize how fast you were driving?! I can only look the other way so much!

Batman: Brazilian free-tailed bats can fly at speeds up to 99mph

Jim: just…just try not to do it again

Batman: the rocket on the batmobile is supposed to mimic the tail of a Brazilian free-tailed bat

I’m forever in favor of him needing glasses

"Tell him to get in line"

Nothing stresses Alfred more than the batfam's sleep schedule

Damian: [trying to stab tim]

Tim: [yelling] where did he get a knife?!

Jason: [reading a book] from the kitchen 🙄