☆ 22/06/24

i dont like jk rowling cause shes racist why are we acting like shes not, woc just sit in different seats all the damn time

⁺˚⋆｡ °✩₊ 29/01/24

dear diary,

fear is such a weird thing? why do i care about what other people are doing and if i see them or if they perceive me,, i really shouldn't be having such limiting thoughts, i want to conquer all my social fears this week, i'm going to make it my goal.

today was very all over the place but i think it fell in place beautifully? even if it's not what i wanted. i think these days theres just comfort thinking in the air, as in how my clothes feel against my body or how the wind flows outside, the sound of the train station every morning, the squelchy noise my boots make every time i step on the pavement.. like that, is there a word for that? is it mindful thinking? i also want to focus on the present a lot this week.

my train ticket ended up declining this morning and for a moment it felt so humiliating but i then realised that it wasn't, i just had to put more money into my account and just move on, i now want to live like that. if it doesn't serve me i just move on with it.

i had mentoring today and it was so freeing to finally be able to discuss with a teacher why i struggle in certain lessons and how i can combat them,, now i just have to actual put that in practice

i also finally submitted a poetry piece into a college comp and im pretty proud of the piece ♡ i hope i have a chance of winning it but i also know that if i believe in myself i'll get the outcome that is most ideal

today was slightly anxiety inducing but mainly due to my own fears and self esteem, gives me something to work on~ i hope tommorow is a better day for myself.

My absolute hottest take is that, from a culturally relative perspective, no food is bad. None of it. It's an expression of culture, art, history, ecology, material conditions, subjective taste. It's all inedible pap to somebody and the taste of childhood for someone else. Americans be eating cheesed burger. Pea wet is as good as gravy in Wigan. The French eat snails and the Inuit eat seal, the Germans eat sauerkraut and the Russians drink kvass, the Inca ate cavy and the Romans ate flamingo. People around the world have been eagerly awaiting their serving of simple bread or thin porridge or fermented milk product or pickled whatever-the-fuck since we learned to cook food over fire. We all love the slop we grew up eating. Food is a reflection of millennia of culture and loving human artistic expression. Attempting to extrapolate largely harmless online food banter into actual serious comparative rankings or half-baked critical analyses of cultures based on how much you subjectively don't like what they eat is a miserable way to live. Live a little. Peace and love on the only planet with food.

8/5/25

okay fuck it we're starting this again

today i had a verbal shutdown for the first time IN PUBLIC and it was really awkward navigating it

i bought a chiikawa blind box, havent opened it yet tho

had this on repeat for an hour today

Monday’s Watch.

There is no prize to perfection… only an end to pursuit.

☆ 20/06/24

the sunrise was pretty today :3 sorry i couldnt update yesterday, me and my siblings were out all night we went to a hiking trail at 12am and went to a field at 3am napped there for a bit all the way up until sunrise. today was slow but nevertheless peaceful

We need to stop being so anxious about our loved ones needing some space from us. It's ok to need some alone time, it's ok to take time to regroup after a disagreement, space does not equal separation, and our anxiety of separation is not a reason to deny someone the space they need. Even needing time everyday spend alone is normal. Some people need more space than others and that's ok. They will come around. Give them a minute.

No offense but literally nothing and no one is and will ever be out of your league. Nothing is too good for you. Nobody has the right to make you feel like you are not enough or less than you are, you deserve the world.