Getting Back Into The Swing Of Things By Making Ref Sheets For Myself (kinda)

jason todd as my experience getting glasses:

Jason: *leans over to tim* what does that billboard say? tim: tim: damn, you blind as fuck jason: DID I ASK FOR THE SASS OR THE FUCKING BILLBOARD

jason: i can't find the paprika- alfred: it's right there, master jason stephanie: do you need your eyes checked? jason: i made an appointment seven months ago and it's still gonna be like five weeks from now stephL: i guess you're . . . . jason: don't you fucking say it, blondie steph: *whispers* blind as a bat jason: *running at her* im going to kill you

jason: what does that say? bruce: *frowns* you can't read that? jason: no i can im just asking---OBVIOUSLY FUCKING NOT

bruce: hey can you read that menu for damian, he's too short to see it jason: no i can't bruce: why not? tim: he's a blind old man jason: and people wonder why i tried to blow all y'all up

jason: i knew my years of obsessively reading no matter the light source or proximity to my face would simeday bite me in the ass. but i really thought it would be like, me walking off a building with my nose in a book or some shit. not having my eyeballs rebel against me. bruce: this is concerning on very many levels

jason: *goes to eye appointment* doctor: so when was your last visit to the eye doctor? jason: jason: um. never. doctor: . . . and, uh, regular doctor? do you have any paperwork from that at least? jason: *laughs* no. doctor: . . . birth certificate? jason: what do i look like, an adult? doctor: *staring up at the brick powerhouse in front of him* . . . yes? jason: *slaps knee* that's a good one. hang on, lemme call my brother. he can probably help seeing as when i was recently dead he was the one that filed all my paperwork and kept my birth certificate and all that shit. doctor: *having an aneurysm* recently dead-

jason: *reading letters off as doctor puts them on the screen* z . . . h . . . . p . . . q? . . . r . . . doctor: *winces* jason: you know i can still see your face right doctor: jason: why are we even doing this. im 100% sure i need the fucking glasses.

jason: *texting roy later* guess who's eyes worked just enough to see the supresssed winces on the doctors faces as they read off every other letter incorrectly roy: HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH jason: your lack of sympathy is appalling

jason: *sends photo of himself in new glasses* roy: you're giving off . . . librarian in small town who knows everyone and their grandmother's grandmother but when asked not a single person in the town could tell your name jason: that was better than literally any other compliment anyone could have given me and i love you forever

jason: *walsk in wearing glasses* tim: ooooooooooo nerd jason: i hate this family

Jason would adopt a kid (or a kid would adopt Jason, let’s be real) and he would never outright tell anyone. It would be up to everyone ELSE to find out. Whether that be by accident or by suspicious snooping

Jason: hey guys, im gong to the store. anyone want anything? tim: uh some granola bars for patrol would be great. what are you going to the store for? jason: *non-chalantly* a night light tim: tim: are you . . . afraid of the dark? jason: no tim:

jason: *yanking a super sugary cereal out of dick's hands* that stunts growth and development dick: dick: i am,,,,, fully rown and developed?????? jason: well then you're setting a bad example for young and impressionable children dick: damian????????? jason: no dick: then who?????

cassandra: would you like to come to my ballet recital? everyone else is busy. jason: umm . . . can i bring a plus one? cassandra: sure. who? jason: my daughter cassandra: awww that's a great idea! later: cassandra: wait. you don't have a daughter. jason: yes i do? cassandra: okay then. *promptly never mentions it to anyone else*

steph: *visiting jason* uh . . . dude jason: *wearing a "my dad jokes are the price of my cooking" apron and cooking while holding a child on his hip* yea? steph: steph: what the FU- jason: LANGUAGE steph: -DGE

bruce: jason has been acting off. i need the two of you to tail him tonight and report back to me. stephanie: no. bruce: what do you mean no? duke: i wouldn't willingly tail jason todd if you told me you would pay for my college bruce: im already going to pay for your college duke: exactly. and i'm gonna to need my life to make use of that fact. so im not going to tail the murderous crime lord turned vigilante. no way. bruce: something's wrong, i'm telling you two. stephanie, who has alrady met her niece and is the first aunt to have been named: ask someone else dude. idk what else t' tell ya

bruce: tim, something's wrong with jason tim, who found out through steph the day previous and has since met his niece as well: he got a girl bruce: *wide-eyed* he has a girlfriend???? tim: that's not-- you know what, sure

prompt from twt!!<33

One can never have too many Jasons

*In the league of assassins*

*Years later*

References:

headcanon that Bruce is worried about his kids who don’t live with them and who he no longer gives an allowance to. Specifically Dick and Jason. But they’re too proud and “self-sufficient” to ever accept any money Bruce tries to give them,,,,,, so Bruce gets . . . creative.

jason: *walking through his apartment* Jason: *grabs Jane Austen book* *five hundred dollars spills onto his lap from inside the book* Jason: Jason: what the fuck, Bruce

Dick: *tired af* Dick: *pours himself the sugariest cereal in his cabinet* *a check labeled “for the dentist you will obviously need* Dick: Dick: I’ll deal with this once I’ve had coffee

Jason: *putting on a show for a few watching criminals* get outta the Alley, Bat! Bruce: I need information first, Hood. Jason: *internally thinking “this is not part of the script!”* what d’ya want? Bruce: the locations of Penguin’s goons. Jason: *rattles off locations, assuming Bruce just wants to draw out the act* Bruce: *nods solemnly and hands him four hundred dollars* for your trouble *disappears* Jason: Jason: *mutters under his breath* I swear to god Dick: *walking down the street* a little boy: hey mister!!! Dick: uh—hello? Are you okay, kid? What’s up? Boy: some dude in a really fancy suit asked me t’ give you this! *hands him an envelope that is obviously money* Dick: Dick: *smiling through gritted teeth* ah, thanks. Um where did you say he was? Kid: *shrugs* Dick: here. Just take the envelope to your mom, okay? Jason: *going through paperwork for a case* his goons: *knock on the door* Jason: come in goons: uh, hood, sir— Jason: *raises eyebrow* yeah? Goons: we just got . . . Paid? Jason: by who??? Ain’t I payin’ ya? Goons: exactly. So uh, we don’t know where the’ money came from. But it’s a shit ton. Jason: *sighs* and why are you even coming to me about this? Why not take the money for yourselves? Goons: there was a post it on th’ bills sayin’ “I’ll know if this does not reach Hood”. Writing was crap. Jason: *under his breath* fuck

been reading world's finest comics and fell in love with superbat co-parenting robin dynamic. that's litcherally their son

Freshly adopted Jason, who is so used to taking care of his mother that the first morning in the manor, he wakes up in early hours to cook for Bruce, too.

Logically speaking, he understands that Bruce doesn't need it — he is a healthy adult, and they have Alfred — but it is six in the morning, and his mind is foggy, so he just follows his instincts. Maybe he does not even realise that mom is not here, after all.

Alfred finds him in the weakly dimmed kitchen when he finishes his walk around the Manor before starting with his chores. He is amused at first, stopping quietly behind the child. He is doing great (that's a surprise since Dick intentionally just stirred more trouble), and Alfred can't help but smile a little.

'Good morning, master Jason. If you are hungry, you should wake me up the next time. I promise to take care of you.'

Jason blinks owlishly, still awfully sleepy. His eyes are barely opened, his hands working on the automat.

'Breakfast,' he mumbles, frowning a little. 'For mom- I mean, for dad.'

Alfred's smile falters. His original impression shifts in a late realisation.

Oh.

'Master Jason, you shouldn't really-'

'Finished,' he yawns, putting a one — just one, nothing for himself at all — plate in front of Alfred.

It is a very simple dish, scrambled eggs with some black paper and toasted bread — but not even made in a toaster, just on the pan; this kid probably doesn't know how to use toasters. It smells nice, Alfred compliments mentally.

'Can you-' He yawns. 'Pass to-'

And then little Jason falls asleep helplessly, falling right in Alfred's arms. He catches him, of course. This boy weighs nothing at all.

'Hey, Al,' Bruce sticks his head in the kitchen, no less sleepy. 'What is going on?'

Alfred explains to Bruce what happened, and he is no less distraught. He helps him to put Jason in the bed and eats all the breakfast he prepared, with a mixture of delight and despair.

And when Jason wakes up, embarrassed by the faint memories of the early morning, Alfred puts a big plate in front of him, filled with so much food that his big blue eyes light up instantly.

'Bon appetite, master Jason,' he smiles. 'Your cooking had passed my personal standards for a cook. You are a good soldier.'

Jason giggles, his mouth already stuffed with bacon.

'That I am.'

And that he always will be.

‘Dick looks like Bruce’

‘Jason looks like Bruce’

Your wrong

Jason and dick look like eachother

They get mistaken for twins or bio siblings all the time

Jason hates it

Dick loves it

oh def. Jason DOES love it, but only when he can use it to cause chaos for Dick

Jason: *saunters into Dick’s office* hey bro Dick: *sighs* yeah? Jason: brought you some doughnuts. Ya know, gotta endear myself to your coworkers somehow. Other cops: *staring* Jason: *waving cheerily* anyway. Toodles! And remember, if dickie here breaks the law—I don’t know him, and our birth certificates mean shit because I’m technically dead anyway! Dick: *puts head in hands* cop: *grabbing a doughnut* that was . . . Your twi— dick: no 😐

Jason "stole batman's tires" Todd would pull ts I know it