Jason "stole batman's tires" Todd would pull ts I know it
Batsiblings convince Jason to get himself a cooking Tiktok account, and he gives in. To his surprise, he quickly gains millions of followers and a loyal auditory. The only problem? Jason has no idea that these people came here not necessary for recipes.
Jason: Geez, my followers had been pissing me off lately.
Dick, confused: Huh? Why?
Jason: They keep commenting ATE. Like, dude? Fucking where? I am not eating in my cooking videos. What is the fucking point?
Tim, choking: Oh my fucking God-
Jason, making an angry text post for his followers: YOU ALL. STOP COMMENTING "RAW". MY MEAT IS NOT RAW. I AM A PROPER COOK. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU???
Cassandra: Maybe it is time to tell him...
Tim, Steph, Duke, in unison: NO
Bruce, awkwardly trying to have a conversation with Jason: Hey, lad, how is your cooking blog is going?
Jason: Uh, people keep commenting cryptid messages. Like, the last time I was showing the right way to tenderise meat for chops because apparently it wasn't clear and someone requested the whole video? Anyway, I did it, and the whole comment section was writing me "in bed, on the floor, on the couch, on a chair, against the wall, against the window, against the door"... Like, why would I do that, not in the kitchen?
Bruce, no less clueless: Maybe it some kind of challenge. Kids love trying new stuff in extreme places nowadays.
Jason: Huh. Maybe. Thanks.
Bruce, just proud to have a proper conversation and somehow a help: Anytime, Jaylad!
Damian, who was unblissfully educated on the slang matter by Tim (because it was his responsibility as a big brother to traumatise him), with his eye twitching: ...None of these words were in Quran
'The familiar feelings of betrayal and fear. Some things never change.' - full title of the piece. I think its a little sad that the most important part to his character is his death. To be known mainly for having died is an interesting- kind of unique way a character can exist (atleast in comics) imo
Details I included in the piece are below <3
Some subtle details i included are like, uh… The lineart for Jason is red, the color of anger. Facing betrayal once again from a parental figure mounting fury. The color of the lineart of Jaybin is- well it’s brown but it’s yellow hued. Yellow, the color of fear. He was so young, yes he was probably angry but he was scared. Both of them are angry and scared for sure. But some more than the other :3 I also chose red for the lighting of Jason cuz redhood- betrayal, etc I fear the green for Jaybin is a lil obvious. Not only it being joker but the eventual lazarus pit. bruised and bloodied knuckles on Jaybin. He fought (idk exactly how it went in the comics but don’t touch me.) maybe punched at the door or smthin trying to get out. tried to include the outfits from the comics they were in, Jaybin is missing his gloves because i fucking FORGOT but i liked his hands too much anyways.. I wasn’t going to put the gun in at first but after glancing at the panel for a bit i was like ‘eh sure. why not.’ since Jason had a gun beside him as he collapsed. Oh and their eyes are basically lined up <3
Jason: You know, I’ve never gotten flowers on Valentine’s Day before.
Jason: *stares into Roy’s soul with a faint smile*
Jason: I should make sure to die on February 13th. Guaranteed flowers on the 14th.
Roy: *blinks*
Roy: JASON, NO-
Roy: *takes a deep breath*
Roy: If you want flowers for Valentine’s you just have to say so, Jay.
JASON TODD LIVES
Who better to beat the final level in Mario than the world’s greatest detective? (Or how to entertain sidekicks 101)
It’s probably Battison, but honestly this image has been stuck in my head for a while — let him be a good dad!!
More Jason warmups
jason comes back to gotham as red hood and the batfam have no idea who he is or that he has anything to do with the league of assasins until during a wayne gala theres a hostage situation and before bruce or anyone can figure out a way to go suit up a crime lord appears and saves everybody only to have a publically friendly catch up session with.... damian wayne.
damian covers to the press afterwards that its because of red hoods 'i dont hurt kids' rule and that he'd met the guy a few times in crime alley before he was dumped on bruce's doorstep. gotham's citizens are slightly concerned but honestly? the scary stabby child that's been glaring at them from the corners of parties since he got here with absolutely no backstory or history in gotham turning out to have a past with crime alleys most infamous protector/crime boss? it's a little comforting.
it's less comforting to the bats.
damian, getting out the car after the gala: I don't know what hood was thinking, making me his public ally. he's lucky the simpletons of this city bought that, don't you agree father?
damian: *turns to see the rest of the family staring at him with hard eyes*
damian:
damian: ...what did i do?
everybody's less than pleased that damian withheld the info that red hood is trained and from the LOA, but damian simply maintains that they never asked. when further questioned about why his relationship with hood was so familial and about what his identity is... they get
damian: hood was perhaps my favourite tutor back home, the only one i didn't kill. he taught me many things, from how to poison somebody to famous quotes and sayings from classic literature.
bruce: what. is. his. name.
damian: you know what one of those sayings was? 'snitches get stitches'
dick: *slams his face into the wall*
tim: well you did want him to be more childlike.
they eventually have to move past it because damian won't budge, unfortunately jason is finding this whole scenario fucking hysterical because holy shit he'd thought about coming back and pissing off his family through their secret personas but he hadn't even considered the beauty of coming back and pissing them off through their public personas.
and from then on the entire batfamily has to deal with pretending to be nervous or wary every time the red hood comes and crashes their very real wayne public events. it's fucking incredible. jason can't believe that he was gonna try and beat the shit out of tim to freak out bruce when all he had to do was grab a glass of champagne, walk up to the dude, and ask politely how stocks at WE are doing. 'brucie wayne' has no fucking clue what to do, and jason just poured the champagne against his helmet and let it all fall to the ground and everybody's too scared to say anything.
nobody else bats an eye when red hood becomes an occasional presence at these fancy events, apart from the people who know for a fact they could be on his shitlist. mostly because this is gotham, but also because they know he's a crime lord so like... riches and business running wise he kinda fits the bill for these things anyway? and if the stoic kid of brucie wayne eases up around him then the whole 'i dont hurt kids' thing must ring true so it's not like he'll cause too much trouble. also the guards are too scared to tell him he's not allowed in, so there's that.
the bats hate everything about this. they don't even know what red hoods game is, they have no idea why they're being tortured and they're getting paranoid about it. damian's absolutely no help because he's just happy to 1. get to see his brother on a regular basis again, and 2. get to see his brother find a less self-destructive outlet for the pit rage he's watched jason struggle with for years.
it's also just really fun to watch tim accidentally fall asleep against a wall mid-gala, wake up to red hood's helmet 2 inches from his face, and then almost break his own hand trying to punch it because he forgot that he wasn't in-mask and had to hold back last second.
dick is mostly just indignant because every time red hood shows up and hangs around near damian, damian immediately becomes a picture perfect public persona, interacting with the elites of gotham with the same expertise of tim or bruce. he's so mad that a crime lord can wrangle HIS little brother in public but he can't, that he completely disregards the whole crime lord thing and starts bugging red hood both in and out of mask about how to be a better older brother to damian. at one point he corners red hood on a rooftop mid patrol.
nightwing: ok, seriously, when I asked damian not to be rude to the new investors he told a woman her coat looked like it would hold up in a fight against two-face, but when YOU ask he becomes a model citizen, what is UP with that?
red hood, being an asshole: *gasp* y-you're.... YOU'RE RICHARD GRAYSON?
nightwing:
nightwing: ....oh my god you didn't know?
red hood: no i fucking knew you're just an idiot. and damian listens to me because I'm the only tutor he could never kill and he knows i'll beat his ass with my magic swords.
nightwing:
red hood: and also im the only one at the league who played Just Dance with him so i get special privileges, like telling him what to do.
dick asks damian to play Just Dance with him that night and damian just looks at him all forlorn, like 'it wouldn't be the same without the exhilarating thrill of knowing if anybody catches us hood will be stabbed and thrown in the lazarus pit again as punishment for corrupting me... it was really an unfair punishment considering he replaced grandfather's bed with a plastic pool covered by a sheet once, and the only punishment he got for that was being banned from the family dinners for two weeks'
dick stares at him. damian just adds 'he used to sit outside the window like a dog. watching and occasionally yelling about the injustice. mother gave him a plate of roast potatoes through the window once. grandfather disapproved.'
nobody knows quite what to do about red hood becoming a gotham elite, but they are becoming more concerned about damian's family's dynamic every goddamn day.
Alt versions of the drawing - the main drawing was posted right before this. <3
Bruce has to spend a day working an important mission with the league at the watchtower but the kids are bored so he tells them as long as they don’t disrupt the JL’s work they can hang around the watchtower and then get takeout on the way home. they succeed in keeping themselves to themselves but don’t quite manage not being disrupting. this is because Tim convinced them to do a tiktok trend.
*the league, pouring over case files in serene silence*
*heard faintly from three rooms away*
Tim, Damian, and Jason: we listen and we don’t judge,
Jason: my original plan for terrorising B after coming back to Gotham was to start leaving him a bunch of creepy voicemails Taken-style, and the only reason i scrapped it was because i just genuinely couldn’t remember Bruce’s phone number.
*Bruce lifts his head, squinting slightly*
The kids: we listen and we don’t judge,
Tim: when i was nine my camera broke because a rogue that Batman was fighting threw the car i left it in off a bridge and i was so mad at Batman that i sold photos i’d taken of Bruce Wayne wearing a thong on his private beach to the Gotham Gazette to buy a new one
*the rest of the league also lift their heads, staring at Bruce uncomfortably. Bruce shifts in his seat*
Jason: THAT WAS YOU?
Tim: YOU’RE JUDGING WE SAID NO JUDGING-
Damian: i feel like we should be able to judge OCCASIONALLY.
*the league, eyeing each other*
Clark: they wont… post that video online, right?
Bruce, sighing: to the family groupchat, probably.
*heard again from across the watchtower*
The kids: we listen and we don’t judge,
Jason: back in the league Damian’s hamster died and we told him it was natural causes but it’s actually because i set it loose during a meeting and Ra’s freaked out and stepped on it.
Jason: OK DRAWING A SWORD MEANS JUDGEMENT DAMIAN PUT IT BACK-
Diana: should you be… checking on them?
Bruce, dead inside: what am i supposed to do about it?
Ollie: aren’t you in charge of them?
Bruce, completely seriously: i’m not in charge of anything anymore.
The kids: we listen and we don’t judge,
Damian: when I was a child I was forced to kill 183 people and I dream of their faces every night
Tim: Damian I don’t think you understand the game.
Bruce, getting up: I’m going to go-
The rest of the league, simultaneously:
Clark: see if the kids are-
Diana: we can handle this-
Barry: you got this buddy-
Ollie: yeah go- go take a break-
🐱☕️