"We Need More Queer Pyromaniacs Around Here!"

“I am a thot and Thor.”

"Miss, can you inject insulin into a random person?"

"Can you live without a brain?"

“I do NOT have slugs on my face!”

-Someone who, as I can confirm, did not have slugs on their face

“MEEEOOOWWWW!”

-My cat. Loudly. In my face. At 3am. Every night.

“Birds do fly, therefore I am a cop. You’re under arrest!”

“No, you are!”

“Have you got any friends and family?”

-My teacher, to the same student she implied had a small penis

“I refuse to get this philosophical over Pingu.”

That’s the culprit

“MEEEOOOWWWW!”

-My cat. Loudly. In my face. At 3am. Every night.

“I’m far too goth for gravey.”

-Me, not goth in any way