Sylvadivariva - ForestDivaRiva

People calling me specifically a "theyfab" is really quite funny considering I explicitly don't use they/them and I have also never publicly stated or implied my AGAB.

People just assume I was assigned female because I talk about supporting transmascs & trans men having an important place in the queer community. Intracommunity discourse people assume anyone who disagrees with them has a vagina. Some of you really are not beating the transandrophobia & straight-up misogyny allegations. I'm not even transmasc, I just have, you know, compassion for my fellow queers?

I'm going to be 100% honest. I don't get afraid very often. I get startled, jumpy, anxious, worried, and many other things, but great fear and dread are not things I often experience. When I first finished Survivor run in rain world, however, I learned of a brand new fear of mine: megalophobia. I really hate ascension in rain world. Not because of the act of swimming down and down and down, no, but the incorporation of void worms. I hate them. They scare me so badly. The idea that in order to finish a run via ascension I have to swim past these beings so large and so fast that there is literally nothing I could do if even just one decided to simply look at me. The fact that they are so large that I am nothing more than a powerless speck of dust before it. The fact that they could easily crush me without even so much as noticing me. The fact that all I can do is pray and hope they don't hurt me. I dislike it so much. It makes me so fearful, so dreadful. It silences me. I really really hate them.

Original comic by Rasenth

I hate this feeling. I hate what others might say about it. This forsaken curse that makes me incompatible with the flesh suit I was born with.

I hate dysphoria. I hate it when people around the world say "it can't be that bad"

And in some cases they're right. In some cases it isn't that bad. But it's when they're wrong that dysphoria gets dangerous.

That urge that can turn to violence or sadness or both.

The urge to crush and fracture the skeleton that makes your body shaped the way it is.

The urge to skin yourself so you don't have to look wrong.

The urge to remove yourself from the equation all together so that you can try to free yourself from this feeling that you aren't in the right body.

Waking up feeling like you're possessing a stranger's skin.

Being misgendered.

Simply existing and having a thought occur that makes you wish that you could simply give up or make everything fix.

If I were in a different state I wouldn't have had to wait another year. But here I am in one of only two US States that don't view people as adults until they are 19.

One more year after this one.

One more long fucking year.

I hate this vessel I am trapped within.

I hate waking up and feeling disconnected from the very skin that portrays my being.

I want to cut all the skin off. I want to shatter every bone and destroy every last atom of the genes that forced me to develop this way.

Sometimes it's not this hard. But today it's harder than I could imagine. The only thing keeping me from desecrating this flesh suit is the knowledge that deep down, it won't change a thing and it won't make anything better.

So now all I can do is wait.

Wait until I'm old enough to actually make an impact to alter my being.

Wait until I can actually look at myself in the mirror and see me.

Wait until I can actually feel happy and like I'm inhabiting my own skin, for more than simply a week at most

Who up gobbling they fucking wawa i guess

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Don't Fall for this scam.

Transgender community, please please please do NOT use this product! It will kill you if used, please do not use it whatsoever.

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THINGS I NEED TO FUCKING KNOW: Why every fuckin trans man or nb person I know who binds is like “oh binders are the worst, you can’t breathe in them, I know someone who broke a rib once”,

And meanwhile over in historical costuming, we are fucking eating, sleeping, swordfighting, riding horses, and feeling great like this:

(credit: Jenny La Flamme, The Tudor Tailor, Verdaera)

Like is there NO overlap between people who want to bind and people who care about accurate 16th century clothing reconstruction techniques?

(I, okay, maybe it is kind of a niche interest, but…. REALLY? Anyone who’s made a boned binder, PLS SPEAK TO ME)

Keep reading

Any of them, though more B et F because I'm tired of being skin et bones

Which one is your body transition goals?

Fucking jinkies, I did not know about this. It's frankly terrifying that Neo-Nazis are here and anti-trans legislature is shadowing what the Nazis did. I am scared of my own future, being only relative weeks from starting HRT myself

if you're just joining us, george takei is having to educate jk rowling on holocaust denial