Doesn't Matter How Much Effort I Put In, Right? It's Hard To Love Me.

The moment you actually start thinking about suicide again after being okay is so painful

I’m 100% sure I’m gonna die by my own hand

I just want to be important, too.

Ever want to kill yourself out of spite? To get back at the people who told you were fine when really you were not? To stick it to them? Or really just to drastically change the course of their lives like they did to you?

Just me?

One minute you’re recovering so well, feeling like life is worth living and you are worth loving. The next you are alone again, feeling 13 years old and harming yourself, reminded of why no one could ever like you in the first place. I fear I will always return back to that person…

bpd culture is they hate me they hate me they hate me i’ve messed up so horribly i can never redeem myself how could they ever still want me around how could they still love me i feel sick i feel sick i feel sick

.

when you finally reach that numb after the breakdown >>>

Idk if I’m just a loser with no friends, but being severely depressed and putting your phone on DND all day to see that nobody checked in kinda hurts lol. Maybe it’s just me.

cute bpd things!!

paranoia

*small inconvenience* BREAK UP BREAK UP BREAK UP BREAK UP

yeah im fine lol look at this meme :D

paranoia

mood depending on them

every text hurts or feels way too good

intrusive thought yeouch okay ouch thats another one yeOOUCH

the 50000+ articles on how youre abusive

paranoia

fp is bad for me but its ok i love them<3

"if i hurt someone its gonna be myself"

becoming completely obsessed with someone the moment they give you the slightest attention

never being able to cut anyone off ever. immediately go running back

cry because theyre talking to someone that IS NOT ME

oh my fp isnt here. okay. oh im dissociating okay i dont have any purpose to continue living without them okay my life literally revolves around them i want to die where are they are they safe i dont know what to do with myself

"just leave. everyone does anyways"

5 minutes later theyre the worst person ever

*looking for an identity* hmmm, where could it be?

dependent on fp like theyre a parental figure you never had

paranoia