This Is Going To Come Off As Obnoxious To The People Who Won’t Understand Where Im Coming From But

BPD math: they said I can come "if I want" instead of "you should come" so that means they hate me and they wish I was dead.

The second I feel slightly better I'm like: "you never felt bad in the first place you're all faking it for attention, fuck you fake ass emo"

And then I feel stupid 🧍

You know what’s selfish? Breaking someone to the point where they don’t live. Breaking them so bad that they cant be fixed anymore. When they think of life, it’s synonymous to agony. They just survive each day. It’s not selfish to want to end it. It’s liberation from suffering. It’s selfish to do this to someone repeatedly and ask them to stay.

Why should I stay when no ever did.

a little comic about missing major milestones, feelings of inadequacy, fear of failure, and the brain worms of it all

Knowing I’ll never have healthy, sweet, happy, long lasting love with someone is so painful.

I’m not worth it and you’ll figure it out.

You’ll realise it when I split, when I become distant and difficult, when I say I’m done then cry until I can’t breathe because you’ve actually left.

You’ll leave me for someone ‘normal’, someone easier to love and care for. Someone easier to be around. Not someone perfect, such a thing doesn’t exist, but someone that isn’t too far gone.

I’ll be too much and not enough for you in all the worst ways and I hate it. I hate that I can’t be loved. Worst of all I hate you for it and I don’t even know you yet.

posting on tumblr cause i don’t have anyone to talk to, tired of burdening my fp with my feelings, it just pushes them further away, im so lonely.

It finally clicked in my brain, that the reason you don't treat me like you treat others in your life, is because you love the others in your life. You love having them in your life. I've simply become the obligation you can't untangle yourself from.

Just saying

I think I wanna get better but what if I'm no one under all the mental illness?