Nap Time By Denise Zhang

Duke : "So, like, Bruce always tries to attend PTA meeting for me but he can't attend this week because he is out of the world for at least another eight days. Can you fill in for him?"

Hal, wearing Bruce's pajama set while munching the breakfast meal Alfred had made for them, sitting on the dining table with other bats casually talking with him : "... the last time I checked, the P in PTA stands for Parent, right?"

Duke : "Just a thought."

-after Damian turned 16, at the family dinner-

Bruce: so... Damian, do you remember the Oreov girl you met at the gala last week?

Damian: *looks up* yes

Bruce: what do you think of her...?

Dick: *tries not to laugh*

Tim: *fails not to laugh*

Steph: *doesn't even try not to laugh*

Damian: she was... acceptable, if a bit annoying, why do you ask?

Tim: He's trying to set you up!

Batkids -Damian: *laughs*

Damian: *stares blankly*

Bruce: of course, you don't hav-

Damian: father, are you unaware that I'm in a committed relationship?

Duke, Tim and Dick: *choke on their food*

Steph: *chokes on her drink*

Cass: *smiles*

Batkids: WHAT?!

Bruce: ... I-....

Jason: *laughs so hard he almost falls from his chair* oh Jesus Christ! The world's best detectives at their finest!

Dick: you knew? And you didn't tell me?!

Jason: where the fuck do you think he went almost every fucking friday?

Bruce: *turns to Damian* I- I though you were having sleepover with Jon

Damian: I was.

Dick: but you just-

Batfam: *stops all their movememnt as they realize*

Jason: *actually falls from his chair laughing*

Bruce: JONATHAN SAMUEL KENT!

-over at the Kent farm, also having family dinner-

Jon, who heard Bruce shout his name: I feel like I'm going to get murdered by a bat in my sleep

Clark, who was also listening in: right after you explain why I had to find out you're dating Damian throught their family dinner

Jon: hehe... fuck

You can't tell me that Juni Ba wasn't directly referencing this when he made that panel.

Charles: We saved you from Magneto, Logan.

Logan: What's a Magneto?

Scott: NO!

Jean: NO!

Ororo: NO!

Hank: NO!

Charles, opening his thirty-five-slide powerpoint on why Erik Lehnsherr is a good man: I'm SO happy you asked-

Did u kno u can turn Batman’s kids into the Microsoft Windows logo

The Batkids doing something considered rebellious and Bruce is unimpressed because "been there, done that" headcanon :

Damian runs away and sleeps under a bridge at some point -> Bruce did it at nine years old.

Tim gets piercings (bonus : Kon pierced him) -> Bruce had his nipples pierced by Minkhoa back in the days.

Jason gets home smelling of weed -> Bruce didn't only taste foreign food around the world when he was training...

Steph gets a mohawk -> Bruce had a bright pink mohawk at some point to piss Alfred off.

Dick anonymously starts an OF -> Bruce may or may not have leaked his own sextapes (yes, multiple) for "legitimate Batman-related" reasons.

Cass accidentally joins a cult -> Bruce and Minkhoa competitively founded a cult to see who would get to be the ultimate guru.

Duke finds himself in custody for whatever silly reason really -> Bruce went to prison (more than once) (in different countries) (for terrible motives) (he's still blacklisted in some of those countries)

dc enjoyers are truly incapable of being happy

The Drakes son

-

I love Tim Drakes character and story, he’s my favorite robin if you couldn’t tell. He was a normalish kid before he stepped into the vigilante life, him becoming Robin was one of the best things that happened to him, he’s made friends, became familial with the bats, made a new life for himself. But he had also witnessed so much pain with him becoming a vigilante inadvertently killing his parents and him seeing the friends he had made die, leading him to manic. This comic was also inspired by me doing a Tim-robin reread and the fic Heart, Humble by Betty (it is so good, it explores Jacks and Tim’s relationship and is one of my favorite fic).

What’s with homoerotic comic relationships and this pose

style change i hope youve missed me or this would be awkward

tim really shouldn't have touched the last of the cookies smh

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