LEARNING ABOUT PALESTINE

i want someone to tell me that i make them happy and maybe even horny

Credit to @spaghetty-betty

She keeps making memes for my chunky Paul addiction 😩🙏🏻

compilation of texts my mom has sent me when my cat is wailing outside my room and i haven’t opened the door for her yet

[JDVN] Random Headcanons

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so i'm back and i swear i'm working on all the stuff in my inbox, but i also discovered the john doe visual novel recently and like i love him so much??? i must write for him also cause there seems to be so little written for him

warnings: doe being weird but loveable as usual, scalp gnawing???

okay so obviously this little eldritch creature thing is clingy as fuck all the time, absolutely takes being your partner as a sign that he must be at your side 25 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. i think this is expected to anyone wanting to be with doe. however, allow me to take it a step further:

mad seperation anxiety, will stand whining and clawing at the door while you piss so that he can grab onto you the second he hears the lock open

i fully think doe's music taste will give a person whiplash, he has like pitbull, weezer, crazy frog, and rammstein all in the same playlist

he rarely makes any sort of meals but when he does, they are weird. it'll either be the most vile, vomit-inducing, stomach clenching, nose covering pulsating mass of unknown substances amalgamated together like some unholy sacrifice to a god that shouldn't exist, but it'll taste absolutely heavenly. or it'll be the most beautiful, delicious looking meal that would have gordon ramsay himself falling flat on his knees and hailing it, and it'll taste like literal fucking sewer excretions. how he does it?? nobody knows

will do anything to make you happy. when i say anything i mean anything. ANYTHING.

keep this guy well away from memes, tiktok, any sort of internet humor. if he learns, you will never know peace again

on top of being afraid of water, i also think doe is afraid of vacuum cleaners, spray bottles, and occasionally when you sneeze, just like a cat. when he does, his hair stands on end and he leaps away from the offending object/noise, hissing loudly. if you scare him particularly suddenly, he'll make a very instinctive scramble to the top of the fridge (likely knocking many things over in the process, he's 5ft8 after all) and it may take a small while for him to come back down

particularly loves receiving forehead and nose kisses. they make him feel very comforted and cared for by you, in a way nobody else ever made him feel

if you ever want to pavlov him into a specific behaviour (eg, cleaning up after himself when he's at your apartment), it is very much possible and he will be particularly responsive to sour gummy worms as a treat

speaking of your apartment, he takes it as an absolute milestone in your relationship if you allow him to have some of his stuff stay in your apartment permanently, eg some clothes, his favourite blanket, his 'special occasion cutlery' (its a set of hello kitty plastic childrens cutlery, the print has halfway faded and the white parts have yellowed but you've never seen anyone look so vulnerable when they offered a plastic knife and fork to you, so now it stays in your cutlery drawer and doe grins and giggles happily everytime he sees it in there)

you may catch him trying to chew on your hair sometimes, while its still attached to you. unless you don't have hair, in which case he will simply gnaw on your scalp out of the blue. its a love language

okay that's all for now, hope you enjoyed, and if you guys wanna see some nsfw headcanons of doe i can absolutely arrange that <3

Eddie Munson x Henderson Sister!Reader

Warnings: Hint of sexual content. Minors DNI

Eddie cleared his throat and looked away. His cheeks flushed.  

“You okay?” Y/N asked. 

His grip tightened on the bathroom counter he leaned against. “A pretty girl is kneeling between my legs with my jeans around my ankles. I’m peachy.” He shrugged with an awkward grin. 

Afficher davantage

el gato

some sketch stuff?

hi tumblr i return with little puppy klitz

MY LADY

yandere! knight x princess reader

pronouns used: she/her

warnings: yandere, jealousy, afab reader, sexism/misogyny :(, not safe for work, semi-nudity, nonconsensual kissing/touching,

For as long as you could remember, you’d dreamed of one day leaving your kingdom behind to pursue a simpler life. You adored your people, of course, but the fantasy of running off and becoming a knight had always tugged at your heart.

It was destined to only stay a dream. As the princess, you had a duty to fulfil, and you owed it to your people and your family to stick to it.

You’d spent so many nights staring longingly from your bedroom window, watching as the head knight, your personal bodyguard, Aleron, train with his sword. The way his wrist flicked the weapon so gracefully, you envied him.

In fact, you’d selected Aleron to be your primary guard in hopes that he’d teach you a thing or two if you asked, that he’d be more willing to help you since he was closer to your age than any of the others.

Unfortunately, he was the same as all the other guards you’d ever been assigned, whining on and on about how “You’re far too delicate to learn such a violent art!” and so on.

You didn’t understand. Your brother, the prince, had been attending sword fighting lessons since he could walk, and was never told he was too “fragile” or “precious” to fight.

As you grew older, you began to accept your position in life, even if you were miserable. As you grew up, Aleron was right by your side, growing alongside you.

“Good morning, my lady.” He called out from outside your bedroom, tapping his knuckles to the door. “Are you awake?”

“I’m up!” You called back, sighing as you struggled to pull on your gown. You cursed under your breath, groaning and throwing your arms down.

“Is something the matter, my lady?”

“I can’t get my dress on!” You complained, fighting the urge to pick up the fabric and burn it. You huffed. “Could you find one of the maids to help me, please?”

“I would love to, my lady, but the entire staff is helping the prince prepare for his coronation.”

You felt your fingers twitch, aching, burning to punch something. You’d always been a secondary priority, always in your brother’s shadow.

“The entire staff?” You asked, pressing your forehead against the door. “Are you positive?”

“Yes, I’m terribly sorry. Would you like me to—“

“Aleron, just let yourself in.” You sighed, pulling up the dress that laid at your feet and backing away. He opened the door, only to immediately drop his sword.

He stumbled backwards, his face rapidly heating up, a red hot blush covering his entire body. “M-My Lady—“

“Here. All you must do is tie these ribbons in the back.” You instructed, pulling the dress up your legs.

He didn’t respond, merely ogling at the sight of his beloved princess. He’d never had the honor of seeing anybody dressed in such a manner, especially you. Being royalty, you were always dressed in long dresses and frilly nightgowns.

He’d never so much as seen your ankles.

“Aleron, are you alright?”

“Y-yes, of course, I apologize.” He cleared his throat and adjusted his gloves, standing behind you. He lifted your dress up, nimble fingers working swiftly to fasten the ribbons. “All done, my lady.”

“You do know you can call me Y/N, don’t you?” You asked, turning around to face him.

“Yes, but that would be incredibly disrespectful. I’m in no position to regard you with such casualty, my lady.”

You fought back your umpteenth sigh and nodded. “Right, well, thank you for your help. I hope my body wasn’t entirely nauseating.”

You giggled a bit to yourself, hoping to lighten the mood.

“Lord, of course not, my lady! Pardon me for saying so, but your body is absolutely perfect, I assure you!” He insisted passionately.

“Thank you.” You smiled softly and he swore his heart melted in his chest. “Now, you’d ought to head to my brother’s coronation, haven’t you?”

“My lady, aren’t you going to attend?”

You glanced away. “I’ll be there shortly. I have to finish getting ready.”

He reluctantly nodded and disappeared down the hall. You let your shoulders slump and you quickly kicked off your heels, replacing them with a pair of your brother’s shoes that you’d stolen from his bedroom the night prior.

You turned to the vanity, grabbing an old cloak from the tabletop and slinging it on over your shoulders.

You carefully made your way out back, entering the garden. Everybody was all to busy preparing to crown your brother as king, so it was entirely empty.

You smiled giddily, prepared to start your life. You held the cloak closer to your body, protecting it from the autumn breeze, and began to run.

You reached the garden gates and began climbing, only to gasp at the sound of somebody calling for you.

“My lady!?”

The voice startled you, causing you to lose your hold on the gate and fall. It was only a short distance, you would have scuffed your dress at the most, but regardless, Aleron rushed to your aid, catching you in his arms.

“Aleron!” You exclaimed in horror, pushing his shoulders as he set you down on your feet. “I thought you were heading to the ballroom for—“

“I heard your footsteps going down the hall and I knew something must have been going on. Tell me, what is your plan? Where are you going?”

You felt your emotions heighten. All you wanted was to be free from your brother’s reign.

“I am going to flee the kingdom.” You confessed, looking down at your gloved hands. “You must promise me that you won’t tell anybody!”

He blinked before kneeling down on one knee, grabbing your hand. “My lady, please, come with me, let us return to the castle. Let us attend your brother’s coronation and—“

“No!” You argued, pulling your hand away and turning around, turning your back to him. “I won’t stand by and watch my brother rule over me! I won’t allow it! I have been stuck in his shadow from the moment I was born, Aleron, I won’t do it any longer! I want to run away and become a swordsman!”

“My lady, please, you have no idea what you’re saying!”

“Yes, I do! I am sick and tired of being treated like a fragile doll!” You shouted, facing him once again. He was standing upright now, and you poked him in the chest roughly. “I am much more than a princess! My bones are not glass! I am not weak! I am—“

He suddenly sweeped you off your feet, carrying you bridal style. You glared at him, the look in your eyes breaking his heart into a million little pieces.

“Put me down! You won’t change my mind!”

“I won’t watch as you get yourself killed, my lady. Swordmanship is dangerous, and traveling outside the kingdom even more so. Many kingdoms would do sick, twisted things upon getting their hands on you, my princess!”

“Why won’t you listen to me!?” You grabbed his shoulders roughly, but his armor protected him from your sharp nails.

“I hate to see you so angry with me, my lady, but I’m only trying to protect you-“

“Protect me!? You’re out of your mind!”

“My lady, please, relax. What you need is to lay down and have some tea.”

You struggled and thrashed, but your knight was far stronger than you’d ever be. He brought you back to your bedroom, door agape from your escape.

He closed it behind him and placed you in your bed.

“It isn’t fair.” You whispered, bringing your knees to your chest and burying your head against them. “I hate it here!”

He frowned, his heart shattering at the sight of your tears. “You don’t mean that.”

“I do!” You argued, sniffling and wiping your eyes. “I want to be strong, like you! It’s all I’ve ever wanted for my entire life! Why should my brother have the best of both worlds while I’m restrained to one!? It’s not fair!”

He sat down beside you, brushing your hair soothingly, as though comforting a child having a tantrum. “I understand how you feel, my lady, and I sympathize, but you don’t need to be as strong as I am, because you have me. You will never need my strength as long as I’m around. I will defend you until my last breath.”

“You don’t get it… I don’t want you I want to be you!”

Aleron sighed and cupped your tear-stained face in his hands. “My lady, don’t cry, don’t long to be somebody you aren’t. You’re perfect.”

“It’s not about that—!”

“I need you by my side, my lady.” He insisted, tilting your chin up. His entire body was shaking with exhilaration. He’d never dared be so bold as to touch you so carelessly, and yet, here he was. “Without you, I am without a true purpose. You are the only one I want to serve for the rest of my life.”

He slowly inched closer to you, until you were pushed back and he was sat on top of you, straddling your waist and brushing his thumb over your bottom lip. “My lady… please, stay. Allow me to protect you until the day I perish. Let me bask in your presence until I am long gone.”

He carefully removed his helmet, placing it delicately on your nightstand. He turned his gaze back to you, moving his face closer to yours.

“Aleron, what are you talking about? And please, get off of me, I don’t want to be bothered right now—“

“You don’t see it? I’m saying I love you, my lady. I crave your existence, your touch, your words, your body, and your soul.” His breath hitched in his throat. He’d never intended to share his feelings for you, but you’d gotten him so passionate, so many emotions fueled by you that they began pouring out without his consent.

“You should go.” You mumbled, attempting to sit up and push him away.

He grunted, instinctively grabbing your wrists and pinning them to the mattress. “My lady, please, let’s talk about what I’ve just told you.”

“Get off of me, Aleron.”

“You are my goddess, my entire world, I grovel at the floor you walk on!” He cried, pressing his body closer to yours. Your noses were practically touching, and his lips hovered just above yours.

Every inch of his body was red with embarrassment, but he couldn’t bring himself to stop. It felt so right… so perfect being so close to you.

“All I want is for you to let me love you, my lady, my beautiful lady.” He whispered, eyes fluttering shut as he pressed his lips to yours.

You gasped against his lips, slapping his back and flinging your knees up in hopes of knocking him off, but to little avail.

He only pulled you closer, tilting his head further, soaking up the taste of your lips. His head was clouded with your taste and scent, heart hammering against his chest.

Aleron only dared part from your lips when he felt he may explode with excitement. You glared at him, teary eyed and red faced. “How dare you?” You cried, putting a hand on his face to push him away weakly. “How dare you? I don’t understand—“

He smiled. “That was my first kiss, my lady. It was always destined to be shared with you. My life is yours, I am putty in your hands. Please, say you love me, even if it’s a lie.”

“Guards!” You screamed at the top of your lungs. He frowned.

“They’re all preparing for the coronation, they can’t hear you… please, is my love so wrong? We grew up together, my lady, we’re friends. We’re soulmates. Don’t leave me over this, not now.”

“You’re sick in the head!”

“Sick with my adoration for you, my lady. My lady.” He sighed, burying his head in the crook of your neck, hands wandering to your hips. “You have no idea how long I’ve waited to hold you like this…”

You could only cry into his shoulder, too weak to fight him off.