Astarion Fluff - Blog Posts

The Take Over, The Break's Over - 14

Ascended Astarion x Marin (Tav/OC, cis woman)

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Words: 900 (chapter 14 of 17)

Setting: A!Astarion's palace

Content: Marin's POV, Astarion wants to take her out so she gets a nice dress, Astarion sees her in the dress and is incredibly horny and in love with her, like whoa, down boy

This is not the place for anti-A!A discourse. I love both versions of Astarion, and it's okay to have issues with the Ascendant route, but I will block you if you clown on these posts~

First chapter

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Marin returned from the shops with Evi and Reardon, all with their arms partially full. They'd gotten food from the market, as well as a few other things.

“Astar-” she called out, stopping when she saw Astarion’s head poke out of the sitting room immediately. She blushed and let out a laugh. “Oh, hello there. I thought you’d be upstairs.”

“I was excited to see you,” he replied sheepishly. “Did you get something to wear tonight, my sweet?”

“Yes,” she giggled. “It feels a bit fanciful compared to my other dresses, but Evi assured me it looked nice. I hope I won't look silly.”

“I’m sure you chose perfectly,” he replied, grinning eagerly. “Go on, then! Get upstairs and show me. I can lace it for you.”

She obliged, carrying the dress box upstairs to Astarion's bedroom. Our bedroom? He shut the door behind them.

“Now, off with those clothes,” he purred. “I want to see your new purchase.”

“Well, turn around then,” she responded, blushing. “I want you to be surprised.”

He turned so his back would face the mirror while she changed. She pulled it from the box, feeling the finely-woven cotton and remembering how much she loved it. She slipped into it, tugging at the lacing slightly to make it fit her chest. It was a light turquoise dress, delicate and high quality with a few flourishes, but more simple than most of the gowns she saw in the shop. Though they were enviable, she wasn’t quite ready to dress so fancifully, and certainly not on Astarion’s dime. Perhaps for a party someday.

“All right, turn around.”

He spun to see her again, looking at her in the mirror and from behind. His face was soft, eyes wide, his mouth slightly open as he looked at her. That same face from the moment he first saw me again, in the bar. She could feel her heartbeat race as he stood in silence, staring at her body.

“Well then?” she pried, slightly impatient. “Will you give me a hint? I’m a bit nervous.”

“I’m sorry, my dear,” he finally responded, a funny smile spreading across his face. He walked up behind her to meet her eyes in the mirror. “You took my breath away. You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen, Marin. You’re incredible.”

“What about the dress?” she teased, embarrassed by his intensity. “You can be a little hard to read, you know.”

“The dress is perfect for you,” he declared. “The color matches your eyes, and your hair contrasts against it without clashing. Delicate and sweet, but simple, like you. It shows off your pretty shoulders and collarbones; it hugs your frame exactly right. You look perfect, darling. The loveliest creature I’ve ever laid my eyes upon.”

She watched in the mirror as her face went bright pink from his compliments. She was incredibly flattered, but also surprised by how much he picked up on. I forgot how fashionable he is. Does he always take me in with this much detail? Gods above. I hope not.

“Th-thank you,” she managed, butterflies in her stomach. “You promise that I don’t look silly?”

“Darling, it looks so perfect that it feels like a shame to lace it up and go anywhere,” he chuckled. “If I hadn’t promised you a real date tonight, I would keep you in this room, in that dress, and…”

He took a deep breath, shuddering as he let it out. He pressed up behind her, his hands on her hips, his interest poking at her tailbone. His cock was completely hard already, without a moment of attention from her.

“Holy hells,” she whispered. “Really?”

“It’s certainly not a lie, darling,” he responded breathlessly, making her giggle.

“So…” she went on flirtatiously. “Are we still going out?”

“We are, my sweet,” he declared. “I want to take you on a proper date, like I never could in the past. You deserve it. And to be honest… I would like to show you off a little.”

She blushed even more at the prospect of being seen out with Astarion, Lord Astarion, by people who knew who he was.

“But I want you to know,” he whispered in her ear, “that I will most likely be hopelessly aroused by my beautiful date the entire time. Perhaps you’ll take pity on me and… we can keep our outing slightly brief this time.”

He smirked at her in the mirror, his hands on her waist where the dress cinched in close. She turned around and kissed him, swooning and growing excited herself. He pulled away from her at last, seemingly with great effort, taking another deep breath to steady himself.

“Bleeding hells, Marin,” he murmured. “My head is light. I should get dressed. Something with long shirttails in the front…”

She giggled at his honesty.

“What about me?” she protested as he started to wander away.

“Hm? What about-”

“My lacing!” she laughed. “You said you’d help me!”

“Oh! Shit.” He came back and took the laces in his hands. “I did say that. I’m sorry for behaving like such a fool. You have a way of unraveling me, I told you.”

He pulled each section of the ribbon until it was perfectly taut against her skin without causing discomfort. His nimble fingers moved quickly, but with precision, brushing across her upper back as he worked. She desperately wanted those hands all over her body, without delay. Holy hells. This will be the longest dinner of all time.

The Take Over, The Break's Over - 13

Ascended Astarion x Marin (Tav/OC, cis woman)

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Words: 600 (chapter 13 of 17)

Setting: A!Astarion's palace

Content: Astarion's POV, Astarion's PTSD is really bad after last chapter, Marin comforts him, they talk about the ritual and other stuff from the past

Warnings: PTSD symptoms and mentions of ab*se (Astarion's past) and violence

This is not the place for anti-A!A discourse. I love both versions of Astarion, and it's okay to have issues with the Ascendant route, but I will block you if you clown on these posts~

First chapter

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Next chapter

Astarion laid his head back on the edge of the tub, letting the warm water calm his senses and quiet his mind. The water was a pale, transparent pink from the dissolving blood. He stared blankly at the tiled wall where it met the ceiling.

“May I come in?” Marin’s muffled voice asked from the other side of the door.

He nodded faintly, before remembering she couldn’t see him. “Yes,” he mumbled, his voice low.

He flicked his eyes to her form as she entered the room, wearing one of Astarion’s robes, shutting the door behind her. Her hair was wet from the bath. She perched on the edge of the tub, watching him.

“My silver star,” she fawned, trying to soothe him. “I’m so glad you’re not injured.”

He stared straight ahead, numb.

“I attacked him. He was unarmed.”

“But so much can go wrong in a fight,” she responded. “We both know that. And I’m glad you’re all right.”

“Am I?” he muttered, almost to himself. “I feel so very… hollow.”

“Please, Astarion,” she whined. “Come back to me, my love.”

He turned his head, taking in her gentle face, full of sympathy and concern. For me. Those oceanic eyes. Marin.

“I’m a killer,” he said flatly, reciting from memory. “A monster.”

Her eyebrows furrowed hearing that.

“That’s not how I see you,” she responded, her voice soft. “No matter what was done to you, or what you were made to do.”

“I was enjoying his pain, Marin,” he muttered. “Of my own volition. Just like I enjoyed Cazador’s. I’m a terrible, evil man. I’m a monster. I don’t deserve to be loved.”

“But you feel my pain, don’t you?” she countered. “You’d do everything under the sun to make it better. You’ve said so a thousand times.”

He nodded, meeting her eyes.

“Then you’re not a monster,” she went on. “You’re not him, Astarion. Cazador was a monster. He deserved to die, and it was the only way out. I will never blame you for killing him, my love.”

“But all those other people… They’re dead because of me. Suffering in Avernus, instead of me.”

“And Cazador would never have felt guilty, if he’d gone through with the ritual,” she replied. “He would have killed them all, extinguished my precious star, and never worried about it for as long as he lived. You’re not him.”

He submerged his head, thinking as he worked the dried blood off of his face and hair. He re-emerged to her still staring at him with concern.

“You missed some,” she remarked, reaching for a cloth. “Here.”

She wetted the cloth and rubbed his sensitive elf ear; behind his earlobe, and inside the conch, close to the opening. He relaxed his eyelids and subconsciously tipped his head towards the side she was touching. His inner ear felt pleasantly fuzzy with the stimulation. He regained his senses as she moved her hand away.

“Why are you so kind to me, Marin?”

“You’ve been kind to me,” she responded without hesitation. “And besides, you deserve it, even if you don’t believe you do.”

He stared quietly up into her blue-green eyes, feeling like she was sucking the poison out and replenishing him, as she often had, years ago. She gave him a gentle smile, holding his gaze.

“I think I’m clean enough,” he muttered finally. “I want to rest.”

“Me too,” she admitted. “I’m exhausted.”

He put his hand on hers as she turned to get up from the edge of the tub.

“Thank you,” he whispered. “For caring.”

“Always, my love.”

The Take Over, The Break's Over - 12

Ascended Astarion x Marin (Tav/OC, cis woman)

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Words: 1.4k (chapter 12 of 17)

Setting: A!Astarion's palace

Content: Astarion's POV, Marin's ab*sive ex shows up looking for her, Astarion does a "muahaha" and literally tortures him oops (sorry I know I was meant to be watching him dammit), Asti has some PTSD stuff and Marin comforts him

Warnings: graphic descriptions of violence, PTSD symptoms (Astarion), brief mentions of emotional ab*use

This is not the place for anti-A!A discourse. I love both versions of Astarion, and it's okay to have issues with the Ascendant route, but I will block you if you clown on these posts~

First chapter

Previous chapter

Next chapter

Wouldn't you rather be a widow than a divorcee?

3 Days Later

“Lord Astarion,” came Reardon’s voice from the other side of the heavy door. “It’s urgent. Someone’s at the gate.”

Astarion’s heart started to pound at once. The moment I’ve been waiting for. He tossed his book aside, grabbed his dagger and threw a robe over his nightclothes, tying it closed in a hurry. Marin stirred from sleep.

“What’s going on?” she mumbled, confused.

“Stay here, my love,” he whispered, harsher than intended. “You’re safe here. I’ll be back.”

Astarion closed the door behind him and took a deep breath, slowing his movements and putting on an air of confidence. He made his way down the stairs, meeting Reardon at the bottom.

“I’m sorry to disturb your rest, m’lord. I think it’s him.”

“Quite alright,” he muttered. “Send Evi to my room to keep Marin calm. Stay on the landing with them.”

“Of course,” Reardon replied. “The sentries have him under control. No weapons on him. He’s right outside.”

He could feel his heart pounding, but forced himself to remain calm. He opened the front door wide, as if he were greeting a guest.

“You’ve finally arrived,” he snarled. “I’m surprised it took you three days to find me. Tsk, tsk. Perhaps you’re even slower than I reckoned.”

Del was being held between two guards, his eyes wild at the sight of Astarion.

“Please, gentlemen; bring our guest inside for me, will you?” He turned on his heel and strode in before them.

The guards dragged him in, putting him on his knees on the tiled floor, still holding either arm. Astarion brandished his dagger, the precious Rhapsody, with a flourish. He pricked the tip of his own finger, just enough to draw a drop of blood, as Del watched in confusion. He brought the finger to his mouth, licking the fresh blood.

“Mm, delicious,” he mused, turning his eyes towards Del, grinning to be sure his fangs showed. “Now, I don’t think you wish to challenge me, hm? That would be… so very dangerous.”

Del shook his head, apparently realizing his position.

“Thank you for your excellent service,” he said coolly to the guards. “If you wouldn’t mind, I’d like to speak with him. Alone.”

The two armed fighters looked at each other, then to Astarion, before releasing their grip on the captive.

“We’ll be right outside, my lord,” one replied as they took their leave.

“Now that it’s just the two of us,” he growled down at Del, on his knees a few feet away. “I’d like to share what’s on my mind.”

“Marin wouldn’t come here to be with a little dandy like you,” Del shouted. “And a fucking vampire. You must have taken her, you monster!”

“I’m not sure you know who exactly you’re speaking to, darling,” he drawled, his voice calm. He bared his fangs again, summoning a black mist around him, feeding off the fear in the man’s eyes. Some theatrics before I crush you.

“Now, Delaney,” he hissed, every syllable sharp. He twirled Rhapsody with ease as he spoke. “I’d like to tell you how I came to control this place. I killed the vampire lord who owned it before me, by sacrificing him to a devil. I carved his flesh with this very weapon, in fact. And through that ritual, I was imbued with more power than any vampire in Faerun has ever known. More power than your tiny mind can comprehend. Now, since you’re already on your knees, perhaps I’ll allow you to beg for your life to be spared, like he did.”

Del watched him, eyes wide, seemingly trying to discern if he was serious.

“Go on!” Astarion shrieked suddenly, his voice ricocheting in the enormous hall. “Beg!”

“Please, don’t kill me, I’m- I’m sorry for trespassing-”

“Ha! You think that’s what this is about?” he snarled. “You really are slow, aren’t you? I want you to apologize for hurting my lovely Marin. Perhaps, if I like what I hear, I’ll pass your message along.”

“I love her-”

“I don’t want to hear such nonsense,” he growled, cutting Del off by gripping his jaw, hard enough to inflict pain. “I told you to apologize.”

“I’m s- I’m sorry, I don’t know what I did, please don’t-”

“Pathetic,” he sniped, cutting him off again. “You know exactly what you did. You hurt her, and now, I’m going to hurt you.”

Astarion moved swiftly and noiselessly, taking one of Del’s wrists in his hand, slashing at his arm with the dagger. He writhed and screamed, trying to pull away from his powerful grip. Astarion yanked his bloodied forearm to his mouth and drank from the wound. He pushed Del onto the marble, placing his heel on the man’s stomach and kneeling down.

Astarion drew the knife across his chest slowly, over and over, slicing through his clothes and letting out a wicked, manic laugh. He kept him pinned with his foot as he worked, bathing in his screams of agony.

“Astarion, no!” Marin’s echoing voice stopped him in his tracks. He pressed the dagger to Del’s throat before turning his head to look at her. At the top of the stairs, his servants were holding her back, trying to keep her from running into danger. Gods damn it. They were supposed to keep her upstairs; to keep her from seeing this.

“Please, Astarion, stop!” she cried, desperate. “Don’t kill him, please!”

He looked back down to the disgusting creature writhing and bleeding beneath his foot. I wanted to kill the bastard slowly. But she’s seen enough death for seven lifetimes. Especially after what I did. I can’t make her watch this. With great struggle, Astarion wrested control from the bloodthirsty monster inside him, longing to slit the man’s throat and bathe in his blood.

“This is her mercy, not mine,” he growled slowly, keeping his dagger still against Del’s neck as he knelt to lean close to his face. “I would have enjoyed killing you, slowly and painfully. If you ever return, I will end your life without hesitation. Hm?”

Del nodded, his eyes huge and terrified.

“I’ll be watching you,” he snarled, down to a whisper. “For the rest of your wretched life. You will never again take advantage of her kind heart or trouble her mind.”

“Let him go,” Astarion yelled to the guards outside in advance. He relaxed the blade, standing and taking the pressure off of his chest. Del immediately scrambled to his hands and knees and out the front door, running for his life. He stood and watched, motionless, before letting the bloodied Rhapsody fall from his hand. The heavy dagger clattered to the ground and broke the deafening silence left behind.

“I’m so sorry, my love,” he called out, not turning to look at her, still frozen in place. “I’m sorry that you saw. You don’t need to be afraid.”

He heard quick footsteps down the stairs, and turned to see Marin running towards him, slipping in her bare feet across the smooth floor. He absorbed her force as she crashed into him. He buried his head in her shoulder.

“I’m sorry, Marin,” he whispered, feeling manic. “I’m sorry. I wanted to make him pay for what he did, to make him suffer-”

“Cazador is dead, Astarion,” she insisted. His whole body stiffened upon hearing his tormentor’s name, his stomach churning. “You don’t need to be afraid anymore. You don’t need to kill him ever again.”

“What in the hells-”

“You were the same way at the ritual,” she whimpered. “You were so scared then, and you did a terrible thing because of it. I couldn’t watch it happen again.”

“I’m not scared of Del,” he snapped, his tone harsher than he ever used with her. “I wanted to taste his fear. I was going to torture him to death. I only stopped because I… I know you’ve seen enough.”

“You were afraid of losing me. Afraid he could hurt me. But you don’t need to kill him to keep me safe, Astarion.”

Hearing those words, he felt a wave of sorrow rising inside him. All his defenses fell. He burst into tears, sobbing mournfully into her shoulder. Her long hair stuck to his cheeks.

“I don’t even know why I’m crying,” he lamented. “I don’t know why it hurts.”

“It’s all right, love,” she whispered, holding him tight. “It’s all right to hurt.”

The Take Over, The Break's Over - 11

Ascended Astarion x Marin (Tav/OC, cis woman)

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Words: 1k (chapter 11 of 17)

Setting: A!Astarion's palace

Content: Marin's POV, Astarion & Marin arrive home, he's worried about her, Marin talks to housekeeper about Astarion and hears how he was when they broke up, they have a date at home together

Warnings: brief talk of leaving an ab*sive relationship; conversation about sex work (housekeeper's and allusions to Astarion's)

This is not the place for anti-A!A discourse. I love both versions of Astarion, and it's okay to have issues with the Ascendant route, but I will block you if you clown on these posts~

First chapter

Previous chapter

Next chapter

“Marin, my sweet,” came Astarion’s gentle voice from above. She felt his thin, chilled fingers against her cheek. “We’re home.”

She opened her eyes to see him smiling down at her on his lap. The golden sunshine of the early evening lit his eyes from the side, making them glow red-orange.

“Let’s go inside, hm?” he prompted.

She nodded, fighting through her drowsiness as he helped her sit up against his shoulder. Her belongings were gone.

“What about my things?” she asked, blinking away sleep.

“Reardon carried them in for us, darling,” he assured her. “I didn't want to disturb you, so I let you stay on my lap for a little while longer. You looked so peaceful.”

“Oh,” she mumbled. “You're sweet.”

“I'm so very glad to have you here, my love,” he whispered, kissing her forehead before rising to help her out of the carriage.

“Perhaps we'll eat on the terrace,” he remarked, offering his arm to walk with him. “The sunshine is lovely this evening.”

The front door was left open for them. Astarion led her down the hall towards a savory smell.

“Good evening,” he greeted Evi as they entered the kitchen.

“Welcome home, my lord! And you've brought Lady Marin.” Evi smiled kindly at her.

“Yes,” he replied, admiring Marin. “Would you mind keeping her company? I'll only be a few minutes.”

“Of course,” Evi responded graciously as Astarion left the room. “You look like you've had a long day, dear. Why don't you make yourself comfortable?”

She obliged, sinking into a kitchen chair. Evi turned her back to cut some bread on the counter. He doesn’t want to leave me alone after today.

“It’s so fortunate to have you here,” she continued. “If there's anything I can do to make you more comfortable, please tell me, my lady.”

“Thank you. It means a lot.”

“Of course,” Evi responded. “I've seen how nasty men can be in my old profession. I'm glad you're safe, here, with us.”

Marin felt a blush spreading across her face. How much did Astarion tell her?

“Working here has been more pleasant,” she went on. “Lord Astarion has been very kind to me. He’s a respectful man.”

“What was he like?” she asked, trying to hide her interest, despite her warm face.

“Back then? Well, I shouldn't say too much,” she replied, lowering her voice before continuing. “He was never my client; don’t worry, dear. He was an occasional guest that the men and women fought over, since he was rich, and charming. He used to stay for a drink and talk with us, as if he wanted the company more than anything else we offered. That’s how I learned he was looking for a housekeeper, and I was tired of my trade after so many years. He was such a gloomy man back then, haunted by something. Despite his best efforts to cover for it.”

“That was… after we broke up,” she managed, her throat tight.

“Was it, dear?” Evi turned to face her again, looking shocked. “I could tell you were special to him right away. He isn't normally so accommodating. No one stayed overnight here in the past, even his dates. I’ve not seen him so excited about anyone. But he never told me you were the one from all that time ago.”

“He told you about our relationship?” she choked out.

“Never a word about it, and I never wanted to ask,” she replied, keeping her voice low. “He’s a private person, of course. But I know a broken heart when I see one. Reading people was part of my work, you know?”

Marin nodded, her face burning.

“He likes to keep some distance from his staff, so I shouldn’t intrude,” Evi went on quietly, turning back to the counter. “I know he’s got a soft heart under all that pride, though. Not a lot of noblemen are kind to brothel girls. Or servants, for that matter.”

“Thank you for telling me, Evi,” Marin responded earnestly.

“Of course, my lady.”

They heard a door open, and Astarion’s quiet footsteps approaching the kitchen. He popped in with a flourish.

“The terrace, my lady?” he purred, offering Marin his hand. She giggled and took it. “Evi, would you mind bringing it out?”

Without another word, he swept Marin out of the kitchen and down the hall. They stepped outdoors onto a brick patio surrounded by planters. On a table, there were three glasses: two with wine, and one with little flowers he’d picked.

“Is this where you went?” she asked, a smile spreading across her face.

“Yes,” he responded with a chuckle. “I thought it would be sweet. Perhaps it’s silly.”

“It's not silly,” Marin assured him. “I love it.”

Astarion tried to suppress his own smile as he led her to the table and took a seat across from her. Evi appeared with food and silverware for them before excusing herself. It was soup with a variety of vegetables, and some fresh bread. Marin started to eat right away, realizing how hungry she was.

“I know today was… difficult,” Astarion said carefully. “I want you to know that I don’t have any expectations, all right? You don’t even have to sleep in my bed, if you don’t want to. There are plenty of spare rooms. I don’t want you to feel rushed, or guilty. Not with me.”

“I feel… numb,” Marin admitted. “I’m unsure how to feel. But not about you, Astarion.”

His eyebrows went up with surprise, his eyes remaining soft.

“I just want you to feel safe,” he pressed. “Like you did for me, back then. I can’t repay the debt I owe to you, but… I need to try.”

“I do feel safe here,” she replied honestly. “I always feel safe with you.”

The Take Over, The Break's Over - 10

Ascended Astarion x Marin (Tav/OC, cis woman)

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Words: 700 (chapter 10 of 17)

Setting: Marin's house

Content: Marin's POV, Marin & Asti go to Marin's house for her things, she gets emotional about leaving her old home, she leaves a break-up note for her husband, they're both anxious, Asti comforts her

Warnings: brief talk of leaving an ab*sive relationship

This is not the place for anti-A!A discourse. I love both versions of Astarion, and it's okay to have issues with the Ascendant route, but I will block you if you clown on these posts~

First chapter

Previous chapter

Next chapter

Marin laid her head on Astarion’s lap in the carriage, unable to relax, despite the comfortable seat and his hand in her hair. They had been laughing and kissing for the first part of the ride, but both had grown increasingly quiet as they approached their destination: her home.

“I don’t want to feel like I’m forcing you to do this, darling,” Astarion insisted quietly. “I’m here to help, and that’s all.”

“You aren’t forcing me,” she replied blankly.

“Are you sure? You feel so far away from me, my love,” he responded. She looked up at him from his lap, her face empty.

“I don’t know how to feel. I’m numb. But I know it’s the right thing.”

His eyes were a pale red in the midday sun; his brow furrowed with concern. 

“This has to come from you,” he insisted. “If you change your mind, you don’t have to go through with it, all right?” She nodded.

“Nearly there, m’lord,” called the driver, Reardon, from the front of the carriage. Marin sat up, looking out the window again, her heart racing.

“It’ll be all right, my love,” Astarion whispered, likely listening to her heartbeat.

They pulled up at the edge of the street. The house looked exactly how she'd left it the night before, thankfully. He hasn't been home yet.

“Did you want me to go in with you?” Astarion asked gently. “If it makes you feel better, I can. But I don't want you to feel pressured just because this is what I want.”

“I want you to,” she mumbled. “I don't know if I'm strong enough.”

“Of course.”

Astarion exited the carriage, standing below and offering a steadying hand up to her. She took it and stepped down herself. My garden, she thought. I won't get to see it anymore. She teared up at the thought.

“What's the matter?”

“My garden,” she admitted. “I'll miss it here, in some ways. It's home.”

“I understand, my sweet,” he replied, sympathetic. “You can plant whatever you’d like again, hm?” She nodded.

He placed his hand gently on her lower back and followed her inside the house. She searched quickly for her things - her clothes, her hairbrush, her favorite books, her old sentimental items. Her favorite blanket, and her old apron, and her gardening tools and seeds. Astarion’s letter from its hiding place. She was leaving all the furniture, food, and anything else she shared with Del behind. Before leaving, she scrawled a short note on a piece of paper, leaving it on the kitchen table:

Delaney, I’m leaving. I’m sorry it had to come to this. We can deal with the paperwork in the future, after things have settled. If you care for me, please allow me space to live my own life. -Marin

Astarion and Reardon helped her take her things to the carriage. Seeing all her belongings collected in bundles reminded her of their adventuring days, when everything they owned came along with them. Is my life here really that small? She would miss the plants, and the little birds who visited the front garden in the morning.

“We should get on the road as soon as possible,” Astarion told her, gently as he could. “I don’t want to run into him if we can help it.”

She looked back at her home before accepting his help into the carriage. Her little life. The love she thought she shared with Del, once. Did he truly care for me, even back then? Perhaps it had all been doomed from the very start.

As they pulled away, Marin could feel her stomach churning. She whimpered with anxiety.

“My sweet, what can I do to help?” Astarion asked, uneasy.

“It hurts so much,” she cried. “I can’t bear to look.”

“Rest on my lap again, darling,” he reassured her, guiding her down to his thighs. He pulled the blanket from her things and laid it across her shoulders. “Everything will be all right. I promise.”

She felt her discomfort easing slightly as he petted her hair, with her favorite blanket covering her. She realized how very tired she was, having spent the night tossing and turning, and the morning worrying. She looked up at Astarion’s gentle face, watching her with concern. Finally, her eyelids started to feel too heavy to keep them open any longer.

The Take Over, The Break's Over - 9

Ascended Astarion x Marin (Tav/OC, cis woman)

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Words: 1.3k (chapter 9 of 17)

Setting: A!Astarion's palace

Content: Marin's POV, pillow talk/post-bath chill time, Astarion worries about the future, talk about their past relationship and break-up, Marin worries about the future, mutual care and comfort

Warnings: brief mentions of death, the ascension ritual, Cazador being a POS

This is not the place for anti-A!A discourse. I love both versions of Astarion, and it's okay to have issues with the Ascendant route, but I will block you if you clown on these posts~

First chapter

Previous chapter

Next chapter

Marin sat with her back against Astarion’s chest, his legs accommodating her. They were settled on a couch at the far end of his room, the curtains open wide beside them, late at night. He was absent-mindedly combing her damp hair with his fingers.

“I like that,” she murmured.

“Hm?” Astarion perked up at her voice. “I’m sorry, I was leagues away.”

“You touching my hair; it’s comforting,” she explained.

“Ah, yes. Well, you have lovely hair,” he replied, still distant.

Marin turned her head back to see him looking absently out the window at the night sky. “What’s on your mind, Astarion?”

“Stars are pretty tonight,” he responded, not turning to look at her.

“Now, don’t push me out,” she scolded. “You’re acting strangely. If you won’t tell me why, I’ll have to assume it’s about me.”

“My dear, it’s not you.” He paused before clarifying his statement. “I suppose it’s related to you. But it’s not your fault.”

“What’s with the cryptic language?” she challenged him, watching for any sign of reaction. He is so damned stoic when he doesn’t want to share.

“I don’t want anything to change,” he admitted, still avoiding her eyes. “It feels like being suspended in a perfect dream, and I’m terrified to wake up.”

Marin’s stomach dropped. “What do you want, then?”

“In my heart, I want to whisk you away from him, to make you mine forever, and spend the rest of my days with you,” he responded earnestly. “But I’m so afraid. I don’t think I could bear to lose you ever again. It took all my willpower to keep from destroying myself the last time.”

“Why are you convinced you’ll lose me?”

“I’m afraid I’m not what you need, dear. Afraid that I couldn’t be, no matter how badly I wanted to,” he explained, his voice starting to shake. “You’re the only one I’ve ever loved, Marin. Perhaps I cared for someone before I died, but… I can't remember.”

Tears started slipping down his face.

“That’s all right, Astarion,” she responded, her voice soft. “I don’t care who you were with before me. It was never important.”

“You were so kind to me, and I fell in love with you, but I didn’t know a damned thing about how to do that,” he lamented, his voice nearly a whisper. “I had to learn everything with you. And after you left, I- there was nobody else like you, and I didn’t want to try. So I never learned how to love anyone.”

She turned around and folded her legs, sitting upright in front of him. He was staring out the window as if he were a thousand miles away.

“You know how to love me, right?” she asked, reaching out to touch his cheek. “You did back then.”

“I don’t know what kind of a partner I’d be, my love,” Astarion confessed, his dark crimson eyes finally looking at her. “The months we spent together were in our honeymoon phase. I know how to sweep you off your feet, and make you laugh, and how to fuck you. But I don’t know how to… do the next part.”

“We went through hell together. I’d hardly call it a honeymoon,” she remarked.

“You know what I mean, darling.”

“I’m serious,” she went on. “We had parasites in our brains, and we made sense of that together. We came to terms with it and changed our fate. You were scared of… him, but I helped you find your strength. You had to fight through so much pain and fear to be close with me. We were a team.”

“And then, I lost you,” he recounted. “I was selfish, and I treated our relationship like a foregone conclusion. I was so afraid of the future if you didn’t agree to eternity with me. I took you for granted and I lost you.”

“But you grew,” she emphasized. “I know you did, because when you first ascended, you would never have admitted what a selfish prick you were. Even after the fact.”

“I don’t know why you helped me with that ritual,” he lamented. “You're such a kind and peaceful person, and I roped you into something indescribably awful.”

“I was terrified,” she confessed. “I thought you might die. At the time, helping you ascend seemed like the only way to save you. I didn't want that debt to transfer to you, for depriving Mephistopheles of all the souls he’d been promised. I was too afraid to lose you, and I acted selfishly.”

“Your selfishness is much less wretched than mine, darling,” he assured her with a sad chuckle. “I wanted it for my own gain. But… I was terrified, too. More than I knew how to express.”

“I know,” she whispered. She put her arms and legs around him and hugged him with her whole body. He rested his chin on her shoulder. “I forgive you, Astarion.”

They sat, quietly holding each other for a long time.

“Marin, I'm afraid you still care for him,” he whispered. “And that you haven't left because you don't truly want to be with me.”

“I do want to be with you, Astarion,” she insisted. “And of course I care for him. But even when he was kind to me, I never loved him the way I loved you.”

“Really?”

“Yes, but I thought I could never make it work with you,” she admitted. “Things were so emotional at the end, and everyone was ready to go their separate ways, and… I was afraid to be left behind in Baldur’s Gate, with nothing but my memories haunting me. Del said all the right things. He felt like the safe choice, and he wanted so badly to marry me. I thought maybe it would be romantic to elope with him, and it might… take away the hurt if I made a new life. Obviously he didn't start acting like this until later.”

Astarion stayed quiet, just holding onto her.

“I’m sorry that I chased you away,” he spoke up, finally. “I feel like I made your life worse in so many ways, and all you tried to do was help. I don’t-”

“My life was full of love when we were together, Astarion. I don’t regret our relationship.”

He pulled back and looked into her eyes, his face sad.

“Why don’t you leave him?” he asked earnestly. “You wouldn’t have to worry about a soft place to land. I want you here, by my side.” She could feel her face burning. “What’s wrong, darling?”

“I'm having an affair,” she lamented. “Do you have any idea how much guilt I feel? I- I hate myself.”

“You have no reason to hate yourself,” Astarion responded, trying to comfort her. “I know you well enough, Marin. You would never have done this if you weren’t at your wits’ end with him. He set all of this in motion by treating you this way.”

“And I should have fixed it instead of making it worse!” she wailed, harsher than she meant to.

“Why do you need to fix it?” Astarion asked. “Why do you assume everything bad that happens is your fault, my dear?”

I don’t know. She felt tears welling up in her eyes.

“I’m afraid,” she blurted out.

“Of what, darling?”

“Of leaving him,” she sobbed. “Of the future. Of everything.”

“Perhaps you need some rest, my sweet,” he said gently. She nodded, tears streaking her red cheeks. Astarion gathered her up in his arms, holding her close to his chest and standing to cross the room. He laid her on his bed, pulling the blanket up before getting in next to her.

“We can be brave together,” he whispered in her ear. “Starting tomorrow.”

The Take Over, The Break's Over - 8

Ascended Astarion x Marin (Tav/OC, cis woman)

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Words: 2.3k (chapter 8 of 17)

Setting: A!Astarion's palace

Content: Astarion's POV, forbidden relationship, Marin shows up unannounced, masturbation talk/demonstration, teasing, dirty talk, fingering, PIV sex, doggy style/hittin' it from the back, Astarion's bitey urges make them switch, riding, multiple orgasms, Astarion bites his own arm to stop himself, they talk a little about their past

Warnings: vampire bite described in some detail

This is not the place for anti-A!A discourse. I love both versions of Astarion, and it's okay to have issues with the Ascendant route, but I will block you if you clown on these posts~

First chapter

Previous chapter

Next chapter

We do it in the dark / With smiles on our faces / We're trapped and well concealed / In secret places

A couple weeks later

“Lord Astarion, you have a visitor at the door,” Evi announced formally, poking her head into the sitting room.

Astarion scowled, looking up from his book over the rim of his reading glasses. “I'm not expecting anyone. Who the hells is it?”

“Marin,” she snickered.

“What in the- Gods damn you, Evi!” Astarion snarled, nearly dropping his book as he jumped to his feet. “That's not funny!”

Marin appeared behind her at the entryway. Evi left with a smirk on her face.

“She thinks she’s terribly clever, baiting me like that. She's meant to be my employee,” Astarion grumbled, before softening up. “My sweet, what are you doing here?”

“Del went out of town for the night, so I hurried through all my chores and caught a carriage straight here,” Marin muttered excitedly, putting her arms around his waist. “I missed you so much.”

“I missed you terribly, my dear,” he whispered, one hand in her hair. “It's been too long.”

“It's been sixteen days,” she giggled. “I counted.”

He pulled back from her hug a little, his hands on her shoulders. “My schedule is cleared. What shall we do?”

She kissed him, pulling him by the front of his shirt. Oh, Gods. He felt himself growing stiff right away and pulled back.

“My bedroom, then,” he purred, trying to keep control of himself.

“Yes, please,” she giggled again, her cheeks pink.

He swept her off her feet, surprising her, picking her up under the knees to carry her. She let out a tiny shriek and burst into laughter. He strode quickly out of the sitting room and crossed the main floor to the staircase.

“Are you my fairytale prince?” she asked playfully.

“Darling, you wound me!” he joked as he carried her up the stairs, his voice high and overly dramatic. “Here I thought I was the vampire lord from your dirtiest novel.”

Marin turned bright red and laughed too loud. He finally set her down in his bedroom, breathless from the action.

“Hells, I forgot how much work that would be,” he chuckled. “Perhaps I'm all out of stamina now.”

Instead of responding with a joke, Marin pushed him against the wall and kissed him. Gods above. He could feel himself growing rapidly harder with her hands moving hungrily across his body.

“I missed you so, so much,” she pouted.

“Really? Let me see…” Astarion reached down under her mid-length skirt, snaking up her thigh. She jumped at his cold touch, but didn't pull away. He felt between her legs. Oh… Gods. She was soaked all the way through, to the point his fingers came away wet from even the outside of her underclothes. His cock went hopelessly hard.

“Oh, Marin,” he whispered.

“I want you so badly,” she whined, feeling clumsily for the outline of him through his pants. “I haven't had much privacy since I saw you. I'm desperate.”

He felt his cheeks and ears grow warm. “I wish I could say the same for the cause of my own desperation. It's a little embarrassing, with how much you've been on my mind, and I'm here alone…” he trailed off, feeling his cock pulse against her hand, giving him away. Marin looked up at him, bright pink.

“Really?” she whispered, a big smile on her face. “And how does that look?”

“A gentleman doesn't kiss and tell, darling,” Astarion joked, grimacing with embarrassment.

“Well, it's a good thing you aren't a gentleman, then,” she teased, smirking flirtatiously. “Because I want to know about the fun you had without me.”

“Gods, you don't really, do you?” he replied, searching her eyes for signs of a joke.

“I'll let you touch me if you show me how you touch yourself,” she giggled. His head swirled at the thought of touching her again.

“Deal,” he whispered. “Now, off with your clothes and under the covers with you.”

Both of them quickly got down to their underclothes and slipped under the blankets.

“I wait until I know I'm alone and sure to be undisturbed,” he whispered. “And then I, uh…” He mimed a jerking motion.

“No fair! You're not getting off that easy,” Marin teased. They both snickered at the double entendre. “You have to show me or you're not getting any prizes, you swindler.”

Astarion closed his eyes and groaned, his stomach muscles tense. “All right, I'll show you, but you owe me. You'd better hold up your end of the deal.”

Marin nodded eagerly. He pulled his cock out, sliding his underclothes off, and rolled onto his side, facing the edge of the bed. He opened a drawer on his side table, pulling out a bottle of oil and getting some into his hand. Her big eyes watched his every move.

He rolled back towards her and put his oiled hand down under the covers. She tented them with her hand so she could watch him. He worked the oil down the length of himself and groaned a little. He jerked himself for a few seconds and then stopped, looking expectantly into her eyes, his cock still in his hand.

“You can touch me, but don't stop touching yourself,” she whispered. He groaned but turned onto his back to free up his pinned arm. She wiggled out of her own undergarments and positioned herself within his reach.

“And what do you do then?” she asked, gasping as he put his hand on her cunt. “If I'm not here.”

“I think of you. Of this,” he whispered, pushing his fingers inside of her. She inhaled as he felt around, finding the right spot.

“What part of this?” She watched with interest as his hand moved smoothly up and down his cock.

“Every part. The way you kiss me, the way you grab at me, the way you pull my clothes off…” She shifted herself up onto her knees, sinking all the way down onto his fingers with a tiny moan. He beckoned towards himself, looking up at her. “I think of how dripping wet you are for me, and the way you beg me to touch you.”

Instead of responding with more questions, Marin moaned and rolled her pelvis. She rubbed herself on his palm, looking down at him with lidded eyes.

“I think about the way you sound, darling,” he huffed, getting carried away watching her. He was trying to touch himself slowly for her sake, rather than desperately seeking a release like when he was truly alone.

“Yeah?” she moaned, her voice raising a bit higher. She pulled the blankets back to watch him stroking himself. She kept rubbing against his palm while he worked his fingers inside.

“And I think of how amazing it feels when you- touch me,” he muttered between his own moans. Marin's mouth fell open, her noises spilling out. “And when you have my cock- in your mouth.”

“Ohhh, Astarion,” she whined, rocking faster against his hand. Gods, she is so beautiful.

“And the perfect way you- the way you feel when I’m inside,” he groaned, slowing down further on himself. “How good you feel when you're all around me. Your beautiful face when you're mad with lust, and when you- hah- float away as you come…”

Marin cried out louder and fucked his hand harder. Her hip movements were spotty and stiff, and her eyes widened, focusing on his. She must be close. He took his hand off of himself and instead grabbed at her breast from his place below her.

“Ast- arion, I'm- going to come-” she whimpered in broken sounds.

“Yes, darling, please,” he purred. She cried out loudly, slamming her eyes shut.

“As- Asta-” she moaned, trying to make out his long name through her ecstasy. He felt her pulsing around his fingers. Thank the Gods. He could hardly bear the wait.

“You're so lovely, my dear,” he admired, keeping his fingers still as she came down from her high. “Do you want my cock?” She nodded, her eyes halfway open. He sat up and positioned himself behind her.

“Is this all right, my love?” he asked. She nodded again. He gently pushed her forward onto her elbows and knees. He looked down at her cunt as he prepared himself, lining up carefully. He felt his tension melt into bliss as she surrounded him.

“Oh, Gods, Marin,” he groaned with relief. “You are so slick, darling. You're perfect.”

He used one hand to pull her pelvis as close to his as he possibly could, eliciting a moan. He put the other on the bed to prop himself up above her. He curled down close to her body like they were animals, fucking her from behind, their sounds and bodies mingling. Her heartbeat was pounding in his ears, and he longed to bite her tender neck, to taste her again for the first time in forever. His vampiric pains were gone since his ascension, but he still felt the urge to bite. I can't, he thought. Not her. Not yet. I have to restrain myself.

“I wish I could taste you, my love,” he panted. “You smell… so lovely.”

She moaned as if the thought was invigorating for her. He felt his self-control starting to slip as he got more and more overwhelmed by the stimulation. Oh, shit. He stopped moving, making her whimper at the loss.

“I can't stay like this, Marin,” he whispered breathlessly in her ear. “I want to bite you so damned bad. Get on top of me and keep away from my mouth, all right?”

He used his remaining willpower to pull away from her and lay down. She clumsily positioned herself over him, lined up his cock, and sank down all the way to his hips. His eyes were fixed on her hands where they lay, flat on his chest.

“I'm sorry, my love,” he whimpered. “It's so hard to control myself right now. Your wrists.”

She pulled her hands away in a hurry, placing them behind her on his thighs, all of her extremities out of his fangs’ reach.

“Is this all right?” she whined, her voice high and desperate.

“You're perfect,” he huffed, putting his hands on her knees. “Fuck me just like this.”

She rocked against his pelvis and moaned loudly. He felt the pleasure in his belly building, pushing him closer to the edge.

“Are you close, my love?” he panted, holding back. She nodded, her eyes wide. He thrusted up into her, hard, bouncing her on his hips.

“Astarion!” she cried out, and he felt her pulse around his cock. He thrusted as deep as he could, desperately seeking his own relief.

Marin looked a little woozy as she came back down from her peak, and one of his thrusts sent her top half tumbling down towards him. She caught herself on his chest with her hands, her beautiful pale wrists landing in front of his face again, right as he reached the point of no return. Oh no, Marin, oh no, ohnonono-

“Shit- unh-” Astarion threw his own arm across his face and bit down, deep into his own bicep. He felt the tang of blood in his mouth, his arm burning with the strength of his hardest bite, and the pleasure in his core slipping out of his control. He cried into his upper arm, latched on tight, as he rolled his hips into her and came, hard. His muffled sounds were loud and visceral.

He unlatched his jaw, his arm falling away from his face and his chest heaving. What in the sweet hells was that? He usually had little trouble controlling his fangs, and the urge was rarely that strong to begin with. Not anymore.

“Astarion? Are you all right?”

He opened his eyes to Marin, sitting motionless on his lap, shining with sweat. The look in her eyes was almost afraid. Of me? Shit. I must have looked like a monster.

“Yes, I'm all right now,” he managed between breaths. She seemed to calm down, hearing his voice again. “I'm sorry if I frightened you, my love. I don't know what came over me. I was so afraid of leaving a mark on you, after what you said. And I never want to bite you as hard as I’m able to.”

“It’s all right,” she reassured him, climbing down from his lap. “I'm sorry for the trouble.”

“I'm the one with the urge to bite people, my dear,” he chuckled, trying to comfort her. “You’re no trouble at all.”

“I miss it too,” she muttered, almost to herself. Astarion stared at her in surprise.

“Oh, um,” she stumbled. “Being bitten, I mean. I liked it when you fed on me back then. You were always tipsy afterwards, and grateful, and… aroused, if you weren't already.”

“Yes, it's an… intimate act,” he managed, embarrassed at his past self. “I always assumed you were just going along with it, because of how badly I needed it back then, when I was so hungry.”

“Of course not,” she responded with a gentle smile, laying next to him in the crook of his unbitten arm. “And besides, it's like making a meal for someone. It's nice to feel needed.”

“I suppose so,” Astarion mused, staring up at the canopy. “I still do, you know. Need you. I’d forgotten how badly.”

“Me too,” Marin said quietly. He turned to look at her.

“I’m not quite sure why,” he admitted. “I don’t know what I can really provide for you, Marin. Besides money, I suppose.”

“You make me feel safe,” she whispered. “Like I could tell you anything. Like you can see the person inside, and you want me anyway.”

Astarion’s heart jumped into his throat. Gods, how I want you.

The Take Over, The Break's Over - 7

Ascended Astarion x Marin (Tav/OC, cis woman)

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Words: 800 (chapter 7 of 17)

Setting: Marin's house

Content: Marin's POV, forbidden relationship, Marin's husband fucking sucks but on screen this time, Astarion sends a letter via his servant, they are so in love and miss each other an excessive amount

I went too far for the bit on these letters and made visuals but I included a text-only version below it for accessibility~

Warnings: descriptions of emotional ab*se & dialogue (I really tried to make this guy an emotionally ab*sive creep without being in-depth enough to bother people, difficult line to walk so I'm sorry if he seems either one-dimensional or is still upsetting)

This is not the place for anti-A!A discourse. I love both versions of Astarion, and it's okay to have issues with the Ascendant route, but I will block you if you clown on these posts~

First chapter

Previous chapter

Next chapter

Marin loaded the bread dough into the oven, drying the sweat from her forehead with the back of her hand as she stepped away.

“You smell like an ox,” Del chided as he entered the kitchen. Marin sighed to herself.

“I'm sorry. The oven is hot. Baking is hard work, you know.”

He snickered as if the very idea was foolish, making her cheeks burn.

“Speaking of hard work, I'm off,” he muttered as he finished fastening his buttons. “Behave yourself, a’right?”

She swallowed the urge to say something nasty. “Of course I will, Del.”

“Good,” he replied, kissing her on the cheek. She plastered a smile on her face and followed him to the door.

“Have a good night,” she called as he started down the path. He responded with a half-hearted thanks, not looking back.

“Fucking prick,” she whispered to herself once the door was shut. He seemed to have grown more irritating since her return, but maybe that was imagined. He was acting the same as always, while something inside her had changed.

She took off her apron and grabbed the cushion and gloves she used for her garden. She left the door open behind her so that she could smell the bread cooking, as a reminder to check on it.

She perched on the stones around her front garden, the cushion under her knees. Feeling the sun warm her hair from behind and smelling the soil, she felt the stress of dealing with Del melt away.

“My lady?” came a woman’s voice from behind her. My lady? Marin turned to see a cloaked figure walking up her garden path. She dropped her hood as she approached, revealing a familiar face.

“...Evi?”

“Good afternoon, my lady. I come bearing a parcel from Lord Ancunín,” she announced, speaking formally as if Marin had any social standing.

“A letter? Oh, um, thank you,” she stuttered. “You didn't run into anyone on your way up the path, did you?”

“I waited for his departure before I approached,” Evi reassured her. “Lord’s orders. He wants me to confirm that you're all right.”

Marin’s face burned thinking of Astarion’s concern for her. “I am, thank you.”

“Excellent. I have one more gift from his lordship.” Evi reached into her bag, pulling out a single orange, fragrant and perfectly ripe.

“Oh, thank you!” Marin took it from her, delighted with the surprise.

“Have a pleasant day, Lady Marin,” she said, pulling up her hood before walking down the path.

“You too,” she responded, feeling like she was in a dream. She floated inside, closing the front door and putting her back against the inside of it. She held the letter tightly to her chest, her heart pounding. She checked the oven before scurrying down the hall, letter and orange in hand. She didn't want to be caught reading it in plain view, on the tiny chance Del came home to get something. She locked the bedroom door behind her, sank into the bed, and opened the envelope, addressed only Marin. The letter was written on thick, expensive paper, with Astarion's careful calligraphy folded up inside.

Marin, my sweet,

I was heartened to see your letter this evening. I miss you terribly, darling. Your visit has served as a harsh reminder of my empty bed and lonely existence. Of course, I do not blame you for that. Our time together was far more valuable to me than any continued delusion of self-sufficiency. Your joyful presence feels like sunshine on my skin after so many years in the darkness, a bittersweet feeling with which I am intimately familiar.

We disagreed at the time of my ascension on your vampiric transformation. I recall the details of those arguments quite clearly when I am lonely and disappointed in myself. I want you to know that I will accept you in any form, my love. I am not the man I used to be, but I realize I will have to prove myself worthy of your trust.

I will happily make space for you in my life if you ever feel ready for a future with me. I want nothing else as much as I want to see you happy. There is a greenhouse here which is hardly used, and it makes me long to see you working on your garden to your heart's content.

You are welcome here anytime, my dear. I hope you know that I eagerly await our next meeting. Until then, I will think of you anytime my mind wanders, as I do already.

Stay safe, darling.

Yours eternally,

Astarion

Your comment about beetroot juice made me smile. You enjoyed the fresh oranges when you were here, so I hope you will smile for me in return.

Marin flopped back on the bed, the letter pressed to her heart as if it were part of him. She stared blankly up at the rafters, tears running down her face and into her hair.

The Take Over, The Break's Over - 6

Ascended Astarion x Marin (Tav/OC, cis woman)

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Words: 300 (chapter 6 of 17)

Setting: A!Astarion's palace

Content: Astarion's POV, forbidden relationship, Astarion needs help from his servant to get a letter to Marin, he explains the plan to her

Warnings: mentions of emotional ab*se

This is not the place for anti-A!A discourse. I love both versions of Astarion, and it's okay to have issues with the Ascendant route, but I will block you if you clown on these posts~

First chapter

Previous chapter

Next chapter

“Evi, would you mind taking a day trip for me tomorrow?” Astarion simpered into the kitchen where she was sweeping up.

“Of course, my lord.” she replied. “What sort of errand might it be?”

“It's beyond the Gate. A couple of hours by carriage,” he explained. “I have a letter to be hand-delivered. It's a bit of a… delicate task, so to speak.”

Evi grinned at those words, pretending to busy herself with sweeping. “And who might be the recipient?”

“Marin,” he admitted, feeling his heart flutter as he said it aloud.

“And the postal service won't run it for you, hm?” she replied, smiling to herself.

“Cheeky,” he grumbled. “She's married.”

“Married?”

“Yes, all right?” he snapped, a bit annoyed at her for prying into his life. “I can't take the chance it will fall into the hands of her husband. That's why the post office won't do. You’re a woman, so you won’t raise suspicion if you’re seen speaking to her. I need you to deliver it personally.”

She avoided his sharp gaze, a small blush across her tanned cheeks. “Of course, my lord.”

“Thank you,” he growled. “She should be at home during the daytime. I'd like you to wait out of sight until the afternoon, when the husband leaves for work. I'm not sure what hour he leaves the house, mind you - only that he works in a tavern. Bring something to keep busy while you wait.”

“Understood, my lord.”

“I’ll provide you with some extra gold for your discretion,” he impressed upon her, speaking carefully. “I'm paying you more than usual to take most of the day off, Evi. It needs to be done exactly right. This is a matter of her safety.”

She stopped pretending to focus on her task and met his eyes, looking sincere. “There’s no need to worry, Lord Astarion. I won't let you down.”

The Take Over, The Break's Over - 5

Ascended Astarion x Marin (Tav/OC, cis woman)

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Words: 400 (chapter 5 of 17)

Setting: A!Astarion's palace

Content: Astarion's POV, forbidden relationship, Marin sends a letter, her husband fucking sucks, they are so in love and miss each other an excessive amount

I went too far for the bit on these letters and made visuals but I included a text-only version below it for accessibility~

Warnings: descriptions of emotional ab*se

This is not the place for anti-A!A discourse. I love both versions of Astarion, and it's okay to have issues with the Ascendant route, but I will block you if you clown on these posts~

First chapter

Previous chapter

Next chapter

Several days later

“My lord,” came Evi’s muffled voice from beyond his study door. “The evening post has arrived.”

Astarion rose from his desk immediately. There wasn't much point in hoping, but he did, every time. He opened the door and took the envelopes from her hands.

“Thank you,” he muttered absent-mindedly, thumbing through them right in front of her. Is that-

“You're welcome,” Evi responded with a knowing smile, excusing herself. One was addressed in Marin’s handwriting, Ld. Astarion Ancunín, with a return address reading only M. He took it to his desk and cut it open immediately, his heart racing, careful not to slice through her handwriting on the envelope.

Dearest Astarion,

The days have been so dull since we parted. Del has been watching me more carefully than usual since his return, and I’ve been busy with my housework. I don't think he suspects me of our visit, but I have been more absentminded than usual, which may have set him on edge. I've been trying to keep up with my duties around the house, so as not to alert him to any changes. However, I think of our time together ceaselessly.

I long to join you again. Even returning to the bustle of Baldur's Gate felt magical compared to this town, and reminded me of our adventuring days. Del won't tell me the next time he goes out of town until a few days in advance, so I'm unsure how long it will be until I can get away again. I wish we could be together already, but we will have to wait for the next opportunity, my silver star.

My garden is thriving as the weather warms, which is cheering me up. I planted a few beets early this spring, and I think of you when tending to the sprouts. (because of the red juice)

I will write again as soon as I can. I have to be careful with this letter and will place it in the public postbox myself. In the meantime, I hope you are thinking of me the way I think of you. Our night together was far more special to me than a merely physical affair.

All my love,

Marin

Below the writing, there was a tiny doodle of a vampire (is it me?) looking at a beet.

Astarion leaned back as he finished reading, slumping down in his seat, his chest aching. She is so sweet. He almost felt guilty for being aroused at the conjured memories of her in his bed, but he knew it wasn’t a reflection of his heart. She is so much more to me.

The Take Over, The Break's Over - 3

Ascended Astarion x Marin (Tav/OC, cis woman)

Rating: Explicit (18+)

Words: 1k (chapter 3 of 17)

Setting: A!Astarion's palace

Content: Marin's POV, ex-lovers reunited, forbidden relationship, angst, Marin's husband is emotionally ab*sive, she's in denial and Astarion finds out, protective/angry Astarion, comfort

Warnings: descriptions of emotional ab*se

This is not the place for anti-A!A discourse. I love both versions of Astarion, and it's okay to have issues with the Ascendant route, but I will block you if you clown on these posts~

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They say your head can be a prison / Then these are just conjugal visits

Marin woke with a start, unsure where she was for a moment. She sat up straight before realizing she was with Astarion. She heard him stir behind her.

“Are you all right?” he mumbled.

“Yes, I was… dreaming, I suppose,” she muttered. “I don't remember.”

“Come back to me,” he implored. She laid down next to him.

“You must have been terribly bored,” she said sheepishly. “I'm sorry.”

“Hm? No, I read my book for a while, and then I rested. I was in a trance until you woke.”

“Oh. I'm sorry,” she repeated.

“Now, stop that, darling,” he scolded gently. “You simply must stop apologizing to me. I'm glad you're here.”

“I'm glad, too,” she replied honestly. “Do you have the time?”

He checked a watchpiece on his side table. “Early. A bit after three.”

“I feel wide awake.” She turned to look at him.

“You did fall asleep quite early,” he chuckled, his eyes soft. “Why, do you want to get up?”

Marin shook her head. “I want to stay here for now.”

“All right, then. Whatever shall we do together, in my bed?” he mused, being cheeky.

“Can we talk?”

Astarion cleared his throat. “Of course.”

“I don’t know what I’m going to do,” she started.

“What do you mean, darling?” Astarion propped himself on his side.

“About… all of this,” she replied. “I thought I could come here, and see you, and then go back home. And then… we’d be even, I suppose. Things would go back to normal.”

Astarion was quiet for a long time. “And why can’t they? Go back to normal, I mean.”

“I don’t want to go back to normal. I feel like I’m in prison,” she muttered. “At home, with him.”

“Perhaps you need regular conjugal visits, then,” he joked.

“I’m serious, Astarion.” She turned to look at him, her face anxious. “Del’s a good man, but… I’m resentful. I feel like a servant.”

“Is he a good man?” he asked, studying her face. “He doesn’t sound like one, though I know I’m not exactly the right person to make a moral judgment.”

“What do you mean?”

“He’s sleeping around, with a woman like you waiting at home. How long has he been hiding it from you?”

“Well, it was just the one… that I know of,” Marin said, uneasy. “It was a few months ago. She had just moved into town and didn’t know he was married. She told me a couple of weeks later, when she realized he had a wife.”

“So, he’s had plenty of time to broach the subject,” he mused. “He’s too pathetic to tell you the truth. Or he doesn’t give a damn.”

She felt tears welling up. Gods damn it.

“It’s my fault,” she whispered. “It has to be.”

“How could it be your fault?” he asked quietly. “You’re beautiful, Marin. You’re a loving person. He had no reason to stray, and yet he did.”

“He’s so angry all the time,” she lamented. “I try to do everything just the way he wants me to, and I still fail.”

Astarion gently turned her chin to face him again, looking into her eyes. “What do you mean?”

“His house. His dinner. All his rules. Everything.”

“His house?” he repeated, bristling at her words. “His… rules? What kind of rules?”

“The house has to be spotless when he’s there,” she explained. “I have to do all the cooking. And I have to look nice for him - keep my hair brushed, and wear pretty things when he’s around. Nothing ever looks good enough in his eyes.”

Astarion’s eyes were red like hot coals under his knitted brows. He looked furious now.

“What happens if you don’t… follow his rules?” he growled slowly.

“He yells at me,” she choked out. “Says mean things to me. Calls me names.”

Astarion rolled onto his back, taking deep, shaky breaths.

“And if he finds out I left town, he’ll be-”

“I’ll kill him,” he snarled, staring at the canopy with his jaw clenched. Marin’s heart pounded, her stomach churning. Oh no, what have I done?

“Astarion, what- why are you so angry?” she stuttered, her voice high and quivering.

He softened at once, seemingly realizing he was scaring her. He turned back to her and pulled her into a hug, squeezing her tight.

“I’m sorry, my love,” he whispered into her hair. “I’m so sorry.”

“For what?” she squeaked.

“For frightening you. For everything. I’m so sorry, Marin.”

“What- are you all right?”

“I never should have let you go. I should have begged you to stay here, where I can protect you,” he whispered, sounding almost manic, his arms shaking as he held her. “I thought you’d be safe without me, but-”

“Safe? What are you saying, Astarion?”

He pulled back from her and pressed his forehead to hers, tears in his eyes.

“You protected me from him,” he said, his voice shaking. “Being with you was the first time I felt safe, and you helped me kill him. You gave me what I have.”

“What does any of that have to do with Del?” she asked, bewildered.

“He treats you terribly! He won’t let you leave!” he objected, his voice high and indignant, before lowering back to a growl. “He’s a poisonous little snake. I won’t wait until he bites you to crush him under my heel.”

“Astarion, please don’t talk like that. He doesn’t hurt me. I’m safe.”

“You can’t stay there with a man like that, Marin!” he pleaded, his eyes sharp and fearful. “It will only get worse. Please, let me protect you.”

“I don’t want to talk about this any more right now,” she choked out, holding back tears. “Please, can we just be together for a while longer before I go? Like old times?”

He took a deep breath, and laid quietly for a while, regaining control of himself. Finally, he pulled her close again.

“Of course we can, darling.”