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@shortmania Thank you so much for answering my ask! (I don’t know why I even did the ask anonymously in the first place if I’m just going to reveal myself? I mean, it’s not like I asked anything necessarily awkward anyway.) I came to you for your opinions because I like how your choices for headcanons are mostly grounded within reality (at least of the show’s reality) or to satisfy the “Rule of Funny” trope. I was really in need of some help for this height headcanon thing because this definitely puts my own headcanon height chart to shame (which is what I was hoping for mind you).
While I mostly agree with your choices and reasoning for why you made your choices; however, I do have at least one or two changes in mind. I think I will make Rhonda the height of Arnold because I personally picture her to be slightly taller than Helga like she was as a child (plus I find it hard to believe that she would be the same size as Phoebe). Also, I may or may not make Phoebe smaller for petty, fan character reasons (a fan character of mine is 5′3″ at 15 but gets a 1.5″ growth spurt between the ages of 16-17). Although, I’m leaning towards not so my fc can have a petty moment of patting herself on the back for finally being a half an inch taller than Phoebe. Got to follow that rule of funny after all.
I do like the idea of short Harold given the size comparison between him and Torvald (which he is supposedly around the same age as Harold). I originally made Sid an inch shorter in my own chart. It sadistically delights me to see that proboscis monkey being in the low end of the height chart. Although, the sizes actually work in favor of my headcanon that Stinky, Sid, and Harold will take the places of Mr. Hyunh, Oskar, and Ernie at the boarding house when they are out of school. So Sid being taller than Harold actually works for me.
This is very helpful, thank you again for doing this. I’m also glad I could help by providing an extra resource for you. I don’t even remember how I found it in the first place? It was probably from a reblogged art resource post on here. Also, it wasn’t that long since I last made that ask so don’t worry about. I understand real life and mental health comes first. I’m in no hurry, take all the time you need.
Have a good day everybody!
Hi Shortmania! I send this ask for character design reasons. Do you have any headcanon heights for any of the HA! characters at their "The Patakis" age? I don't need all of them. Just Arnold and Helga will do nicely as a starting point. You can google mrinitialman if you want to look for something to have a better visual representation of what you have in mind Thank you for taking the time to read this regardless.
Well, first of all, thank you for the neat new resource, whoa. That is super helpful and I will definitely be using that in the future.
As for my headcanons, I’m a little nervous to say because I know they’re unpopular, lol. So little disclaimer there, but.
At age 15 (and likely the rest of their lives since growth spurts after 14 (female) and 16 (male) are rare):
FOR COMPARISON:US MALE AVERAGE: 5'9"US FEMALE AVERAGE: 5'4"
Arnold: 5'7"Helga: 5'6"Gerald: 5'10"Phoebe: 5'4"Harold: 5'5"Patty: 5'11"Stinky: 6'3"Sid: 5'6"Rhonda: 5'4"Curly: 5'12"Eugene: 5'3"
And those are the ones I’ve thought about and stand behind. I think most of these are pretty self-explanatory, they’re just based off their parents, but I’ll explain the ones I know most other fans are likely to be confused by. You can skip anything you’re uninterested in, Anon. ❤️I just like to be thorough.
It is controversial to propose Arnold and Helga end up about the same height–most everybody prefer one of them to be significantly taller than the other–but it’s… just not my preference, for a few reasons. The Shortmans are a tall folk, Craig has confirmed that, but I like to think the males on Stella’s side of the family run a little smaller just because the idea of Arnold tall seems strange. He’s been consistently small throughout his childhood, and even at age eleven didn’t really grow more than maybe an inch or two since the fourth grade. Specifically, I think Arnold’s namesake, Stella’s dad, was the same. That is to say, I think he was a shorter than average dude, and I like to think Arnold strongly resembles him. That’s a baseless personal headcanon, and I acknowledge that. Arnold could be a late bloomer. I just like him a little smol.
On Helga’s end of things, my reasoning is just that… Well, there isn’t really any wrong way to calculate Helga’s height because we know basically nothing about her roots apart from Bob and Miriam. And Miriam appears to be average-ish, maybe above, Bob actually isn’t too too much taller (maybe 3-4 inches, and 2-4 inches shorter than Phil who I imagine is about 5'12"-6'0"), and Olga’s either average or below since she’s noticeably shorter than Miriam, so it’s just easiest for me to headcanon Helga as a couple inches over 5'4". It’s safe, it’s comfortable, it’s funny because it subverts expectations a bit. But I will say this: Miriam’s family is from South Dakota, Bob’s probably is as well, and South Dakota boasts some of the tallest folks in the US. Bob is also some form of Scandinavian – Hungarian, German, Ukrainian, Polish, who knows – and men in those countries tend to float around the benchmark of 5'10", and women an inch or two below the US average. So, Helga could easily be tall. Helga could also be pretty short. I do enjoy it when people portray her as this hulking powerhouse of a woman who could lift Arnold with just one arm, it’s a high quality option I would like to see more of, but my thing is that I’m always trying to a) be realistic, and b) leave room for funny scenarios. And Arnold being literally just one inch taller than Helga and Helga being endlessly salty about it is hilarious to me.
Apart from all that, I hate to mention this, but: Helga isn’t consistently fed, and when she is fed, it’s usually with crap, so. When kids aren’t fed well or often, they don’t tend to grow quite as much as they might have otherwise. So, that is something to take into account. Moving on now.
About Gerald: thing is, there’s that stereotype of black men being absolute mountains because of basketball and I think that’s probably why most people see Gerald being like six feet, but… Gerald’s dad is a frugal numbers-obsessed business man. He’s nerdy. He’s kinda short. It makes a little bit of sense to me that Gerald might be tall-ish because for a nine-year-old boy, he is fairly big? But eh. I just try to split the difference, to honor both his genes and his onscreen rate of development, and I arrive at a little above average because the thought of Gerald being the sole Tol of his immediate family (taller than Jamie-O, especially) is funny to me, and I will always pick the option that is funny to me.
Aaaand both of Harold’s parents are tiny. I don’t really know why people always draw/write him tall–I guess it’s more attractive? he always refers to himself as big? he’s a part of the hulking bully/gentle giant archetype?–but people forget he’s 13 in-show and actually pretty small for his age. At least compared to, like, fifth and sixth graders. Wolfgang is at least twice his height, and I’m pretty sure Harold is older than him. This show is ridiculously confusing and inconsistent about age and child development, but, well. These are the only points of reference we have, so. Yep.
I love Patty… That’s it. That’s my reasoning. Let her tower over us all as she rightfully deserves.
I hope this was helpful! You don’t have to agree with me, of course, but I hope I at least gave a fair baseline for you to form your own conclusions. Thanks for caring about my dumb opinion, lol, and best wishes on all your projects.