But Like I Said - Blog Posts

no one asked, but here is my big speech about shinra/izaya friendship

i wanna start with their school selves

i saw a lot of people saying that izaya was normal at school and shinra just made him "bad", but in my view it's not the thing. like, in shool izaya already wasn't "normal", he just tried his best to pretend to be an ordinary student. he didn't make any close relationship, isolating himself from strong connections with people (just like he's doing it now), but still had to be in the society because of his interest in humas

vol 9, ch 4

and this interest was already unhealthy, for example, he liked seeing people hurting each other

vol 9, ch 4

shinra wasn't really different from his current self. he was obsessed with celty and she was the reason he made friends with izaya and he didn't really care about others or anything that surrounds him in general. he stayed in his comfort zone (love to celty) and was alright

as i said, shinra invited izaya to his biology club because celty told him to socialize

then, izaya became interested. because shinra's lifestyle was different and opposite of izaya's, especially because their different opinion on humans: izaya loved them, shinra didn't care but he loved celty who is not human, so izaya was genuinely interested in his personality

vol 9, ch 4

then shinra was the only person who was a mystery to izaya, he couldn't predict shinra's actions and reactions and he was annoyed and facsinated about that at the same time

epitome of eighteen stories, ep 15 (translation by xcaneolupusx)

speaking about shinra, he could understand izaya's nature perfectly

vol 13, ch 11

so, izaya became interested in shinra and finally accepted his invitation to the biology club. everything starts here

izaya started feeling real attachment to shinra. now he was not just an interesting person, he was a friend. izaya felt free with him because they both were weird and shinra accepted izaya with all his strange hobbies and interests. their communication was full of mutual acceptance and they both were happy with it. but izaya's genuine attachment is really strong, as long as shinra preferred keeping distance with everyone except celty. not because he didn't like something about izaya nor he didn't care, it was just comfortable for him like that

the key thing: shinra being stabbed by nakura. i can talk about different aspects of this moment

for shinra it's just another proof of his crazy love for celty — he protected izaya mostly because he thought celty would praise him for such a heroic actions

vol 9, epilogue

for izaya it was a complex thing. at first, he was shocked by being protected for the first time. at second, he felt jealous and that's what i find a really important thing. he felt jealous because shinra wasn't alone even if he's so uninterested in others. he had someone who he loved, he had someone to love him, he had important connections, basically he had things izaya didn't

vol 9, epilogue

but despite everything, he still was a friend to izaya, so izaya wanted revenge. so, to my mind, this whole situation not made him who he is now, just gave him the reason to stop trying to conform and show his true self

eventually he promised to make nakura pay for this. shinra just agreed and gave izaya free reign. and izaya really kept his promise. 12 years passed and nakura is still suffering

izaya calls that nakura moment the turning point of his life and the thing that influenced his current self the most

vol 9, epilogue

i see this part as the starting point for everything happening in the plot, because this was the moment when izaya finally decided what to do

when shinra and izaya finish school, they see each other more rarely. because it's not necessary to meet every day and they both have things to do. shinra happily lives with celty, again, staying in his comfort zone and izaya, who doesn't have any life and friends, is alone with his love for humans and crazy ideas. and still he thinks about shinra as a friend

vol 9, ch 2

and shinra calls him a friend too

but shinra has priorities and celty is the most important of them, so when izaya calls him from the hospital, he just hangs up

shinra lives in his love and keeps distance with everyone else as always and izaya suffers with his attachment alone, because he can't and doesn't want to get rid of it. but he understands that he's the only one to blame in his state (because he chose such a life for himself) so he isn't angry at shinra. maybe just a bit

there is another important moment, when izaya thinks about shinra being mad at him, feels something like guilt and beats the telephone pole

vol 9, epilogue

friendship with shinra is the closest relationship izaya has, but again, i can't blame shinra for his uncaring attitude. he treasures izaya and still accepts him and izaya's problems are not something shinra can solve

their relationship can't be seen through the prism of normal friendship because they both are extraordinary people with their own standards

i dont care who makes fun of kpop fans or whatever. mfs who hate on us for liking music differently and i dont care who make fun of what i like and love watching but kpop is DIFFERENT and feels different to most people. some see it as a way of being themselves or a connection to different music and people and thats ok and i love seeing that. for me kpop makes me feel a huge range of emotions and feelings.

one of the things i love in the whole world is that as someone who listens to kpop on a regular and daily basis (everyday ALWAYS) for so many years, seeing people who r just like u is so freeing. u could make a reference and everyone will get what u said

another thing i love in the world is seeing CHINESE people in kpop. people like chenle and renjun from nct, people like jun and the8 from seventeen, and more. people like that make me feel safe.

it makes me feel extra connected to a certain aspect of my cultural identity. i grew up hiding the fact that i am asian (desi, arab & chinese) and that i was all kinds of asian, and seeing those idols make me feel so connected oh my god like ways to learn my language by watching them teach fans or them speaking it and making it easy for us by what words means and sentence structures, their culture, their food, their traditions, the way they look, the way they r passionate about where they r from, it makes me feel such a huge connection into being chinese and make me want to know more about my culture like you guys dont understand how FREEING that is for me after hiding that aspect of my identity for so many years OH MY GOD

dgm manga spoilers

this is entirely a crackpot theory as I haven’t reread all of dgm in ages, so I’m likely missing a lot of relevant information, but:

is the reason for the earl making akuma to prevent new accommodators? Like, if I’m interpreting past!lavi’s words correctly, innocence feeds off of/attaches itself to people of particular suffering and tragedy, right? And mana won’t let himself grieve/cry because it will attract the earl (I think) and Allen is the same. So is the earl intentionally going after people who experience great suffering and just… nipping them in the bud? if the innocence is hostile, or even just keeping in mind the Noah clan’s hatred of it, then preventing it from getting stronger from feeding or gaining the ability of fight would be a smart move.

I’m not sure why specifically going after people in deep grief is a qualifier outside narrative themes, but it would make some sense to me, especially if the Noah’s past world was destroyed due to something relating to the innocence.