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Cisnormativity - Blog Posts

6 years ago

What I find immensely disappointing and hypocritical is the stubborn refusal by cishet people to understand queer identities and feelings. They claim their reason for non-belief is ignorance, but have they ever tried to come out of their 'ignorance is bliss' bubble?

Cishet people are quick to reject any literature or media which involves - or talks about the the lives and experiences of - queer people; they say that they're unable to relate, hence it would simply bore them or go over their heads.

How is it possible to understand people if you're not ready to see their point of view? How is it possible to understand people if you're not ready to listen to what they have to say? You say you don't want to read a book about a non-binary character, not fair, but we'll assume it is as to not offend your little cishet feelings. But when somebody tries to tell you that non-binary identities are valid and that sex≠gender or that a person's feelings matter more than what YOU perceive or assume their gender to be based on their genitilia/chromosomes/sex organs, you immediately reject even the possibility of their existence by claiming that you haven't heard about anybody like that/ you just don't get it/ it's hard to understand when you haven't gone through it.

Books and media don't just provide knowledge, they show you perspectives you've never imagined before, they talk about the lives of different people, they help you empathize, they help you understand different cultures, genders, sexualities, feelings- and claiming to "not getting it" is fucking bullshit when you refuse to even acknowledge these resources which would let you gain knowledge and understanding.

I recently saw a person comment how a certain sexuality wasn't valid and that it was "common sense", to which another person replied, telling them to read a certain book wherein a person talks about their experienced. The former mockingly said that they didn't have time to waste reading about matters which were bullshit in the first place and stuck by their argument - refusing to listen to a person who both, who was experiencing it themselves and had read a book about the same. What the actual fuck?

How does this even remotely make sense? You are rejecting a person's identity - a totally valid identity by the way - while not knowing a goddamn thing about it, assuming you didn't have to because it's just "common fucking sense"?

Common sense is not common anymore. And I don't mean it in the "you're stupid, shut up" way - I mean it in the "common sense in this context, is an illusion created by the cisheteronormative culture we live in to reject and shame any sexuality or gender which does not fall under 'heterosexual' or '(cis) male and female' categories. Moreover, it is a form of gatekeeping where asslicker queer people refuse to acknowledge any sexuality other than gay, lesbian or bisexual and any gender other the binary genders.'

So no, your ignorance isn't "common sense", it's erasure and prejudice and your refusal to learn and unlearn concepts means you're blatantly rejecting the truth about the world, you're ignoring the world for what it actually is - fluid and ever evolving.


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