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I swear I'm trying to change whatever's wrong with me.
It gets hard when the happier I am the less ok I feel.
When the more I let myself hug my friends the more being touched makes me want to hurl.
The more I care about everyone else, the less I care about myself.
The less I let them hate themselves the more I hate myself.
I try to work outside in but It feels more like turning myself inside out.
Why is it so hard for me to like myself half as much as I love everyone else?
Why is it so difficult to care about myself yet so easy to take care of everyone else?
Why do I feel like I'm giving myself away
Why do I feel like they hate me
Why do I feel so hopeless
Why do I feel so lost
Why can't I feel anything...?
Please, for the love of god, let me smile and breathe at the same time
Let me actually feel all those emotions I was promised
Someone make me less selfish.