Erikar - Blog Posts

these are undercooked but i love how they look on the screen thru the phonr cam :]

pesterlog dialog for deez guyz + alt colors n closeup under cut

CA: (oh my cod kar are you seain wwhat im seain) CG: (THAT TACKY MALL COPS RUN OF THE MILL- NO MORE LIKE RUN OVER BY A THOUSAND HOOFBEASTS SIMULTANEOUSLY EXPERIENCING THEIR CHUTES CONVULSE AND VACATE THE EVER SO FRAGRANT CONTENTS OF THEIR EXCREMENT TUNNELS. LIKE THEY ALL STOPPED THEIR STAMPEDE FOR A SNACK BREAK OF GAS STATION SUSHI AND THE SIGHT OF THAT BASTARD SHOCKED THE WEAKEST MOST DELICATE OF THEM ALL TO LET IT LOOSE SUBSEQUENTLY TRIGGERING THE ENTIRE HERD TO EXPLODE IN A RIVVER OF-OH FUCK) CG: (DOES IT LOOK LIKE HES COMING THIS WAY OR-) CG: OH MY GOD HE JUST SHOVED THAT POOR WRIGGLER OUT OF THE WAY AND HES LOOKING STRAIGHT AT ME LIKE I OWE HIM MONEY HE MUST DESPERATELY NEED CG: OH FUCK. OH GOD HE LOOKS LIKE HE COULD TAKE EQUIUS ON. OK, OK, OK, THIS IS FINE THIS IS LIGHT WORK! JUST GOTTA COME UP WITH A PLAN REAL FUCKING QUICK CG: ... CG: GOG WHY DOES THIS ALWAYS HAPPEN TO US?!? I MEAN SEALIOUSLY WE CAN'T BE THE ONLY ASSHOLES WHO GOSSIP ABOAT THE LOCAL MULTIPLEXCRETIA FROM TIME TO TIME

CG: UGHHHHHH I REALLY DONT WANNA GET KICKED OUT OF THIS ONE, THEYVE GOT THE BEST GRUBBLE TEA!!! SHIT I'D ASK YOUR ADVICE BUT I KNOW YOU'RE JUST GONNA SAY WE MURDER THE POOR BASTARD- OH FUCK HE'S JOGGING NOW. JUST GREAT. I DON'T THINK I'VE EVER SEEN ONE OF THEM DO THAT CA: oh cmon kar put a little faith in me CA: although to be quite frank i dont think no body wwould miss paul blart ovver here like somebody needs to put him out of his misery for the dowwnright pathetic example hes settin for this fine establishment CA: oh fin dont evven start ill just threaten him a little and wwith that fuckin wwriggler toy excuse for a wweapon im sure hell back off before you can snap your gripin little clawws CG: ALRIGHT BUT DONT YOU EVEN FUCKING THINK OF PULLING THE CROSSHAIRS OUT AS "JUST A THREAT." THIS IS GONNA BE A VOCAL THING ONLY, AND SPEAKING OF EXPATIATING, WE MIGHT EVEN GET OUT OF THIS UNBANNED AND WITHOUT BLOOD ON OUR HANDS IF YOU JUST DONT. SO JUST TO BE CRYSTAL FUCKING CLEAR, I NEED YOU TO JUST SIT THERE LOOKING PRETTY AND SHUTTING YOUR TRAP LIKE YOU'RE BEING EXPLOITED FOR ENTERTAINMENT BY MR.FEAST IN EXCHANGE FOR A MILLION FUCKING BUCKS OKAY? YOU WOULD ABSOLUTELY KILL AT THAT KIND OF THING IF YOU TRIED, YOUR NONVERBAL BITCHFEST COMMUNICATION ALONE WOULD RACK IN BILLIONS OF VIEWS SO LETS JUST PRETEND!! OKAY?? THIS IS JUST THE FUN MAKE BELEIVE TIME PART OF OUR DATE. CG: WE CAN GO TO THAT STUPID SALAD PLACE YOU LIKE SO MUCH IF YOU JUST TRUST ME TO HANDLE THIS LIKE THE COMPETENT ORATOR I AM AND WAS ALWAYS HATCHED TO BE CG: I MEAN I DONT DISAGREE THAT SOMEONE SHOULD TAKE THIS GUY DOWN A PEG BUT I DONT MEAN THAT LITERALLY SO "WWATCH YOURSHELF" OR I SWEAR TO GOD- CG: OH WHY HELLO MR MALL COP- I MEAN OFFICER!! WE WERE JUST HARMLESSLY PATRONIZING THIS- CA: listen here you ovvergrowwn frat trash wwhy dont you haul you and your little school girl baton in the other direction and do your fuckin job for a change instead of eavvsdroppin like the no life havvin filth wwallowwing pig loser scum you undoubtedly are or i promise ill make it so you wwont havve a chance in shell at employment anywwhere EVVER again CG: OF FUCKING COURSE