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Normalize this kind of conversation

"It's the same as you like dogs and I like cats. It's your preference"

- Tul

'Levitating Towards You' Ao3-Paint_the_sky_18

Can we ever be brave enough to risk it in case of Love?

..

A friend that anyone could have.

A friend Pi never thought would show him what it means to truly care for someone. And tell him that it's okay to make mistakes, most of them can be fixed. That kindness could lead to things that aren't horrible.

It was nice talking to someone about his day, text them at wee hours and not expect it to be ignored. Have just as much to text back. Who listens.

Having a friend was a nice feeling.

He, for the first time, trusted himself at his most vulnerable moment, which is conpletly hammered with intoxication and prone to do embarrassing things, to someone.

What more could he want?

That's what he though.

Until get let his intrusive thoughts win. Not like he was in any state to decide for himself.

It helps that there hasn’t been any awkwardness between the two of them.

Nothing was mentioned.

Mork haven’t brought up that night since, which Pi is glad for; he’d much rather settle into the easy rhythm of their friendship, carefully leaving certain things unsaid, than risk speaking up and tripping them into awkwardness.

But he can't breathe easier after confirming his suspicions. Doesn't make much of a difference now that he knows he has feelings for the senior.

Neither can he stop himself from being stiff and panicked when they get too close. It used to bother him, but now he shamefully craves for it. And hates it too.

Everything with Mork could go back to normal if only his heart stops skipping beats when they touched, heat rising up his neck feelings warm all over through the fabric.

If Mork noticed, he dodged it with silly excuses of summer heat and hpw he had something to do before scurrying away. He can't explain why his voice suddenly sounded so strangles.

By the time a few weeks have passed, Pi can almost pretend nothing happened at all.

Almost.

It’s just.

Sometimes, he can’t help the looks. Mostly at those lips.

He’ll be in the library, or at Mork's to crash on his couch for movie night, and every now and then Pi's eyes will catch on his face concentrating on the plot—and before he knows it, he’s staring.

Avidly.

Mork is always so close somehow even if here is a respectful distance and Pi sees his hands and arms and chest and remembers, remembers the way he was held.

The sturdy and first chest pressed against his back when he tripped, strong arms that dragged him when they pretended to skate on the marble floor.

Then it would land on those dreadful lips. And he could feel the drop of of sweat tickling at the back of his neck, rapid fastening of his breathing. The way his eyes felt like closing, and leaning in much closer, maybe climb on to his lap-

Okay.

Maybe he is a little hung up on it.

Mork seems like he forgot about it too. Or maybe he remember but doesn't want to emberass Pi by bringing it up. Make fun of his sloppy, non-existant kissing skills. Be disgusted.

But then what could he say when he was hiding cowardly under the pretence of forgetting in his drunk haze. He wasn't the confrontational kind of guy. It was pretty freaking obvious.

But that’s fine, because usually he blinks it away, and then a moment later he’s back to laughing at Mork's pick up lines or catching back into the movie; whatever else they happen to be doing at the time.

He was not treated differently like he expected the moment he remembered the night's event. Which conflicts if Pi should mention it or not. Will it make any difference. He hopes not if he decided to.

He’s used to boxing up his sudden attraction to Mork. That is nothing new, repressing his true feelings.

But he isn't that afraid, it's surprising. He isn't panicked by the reality of it, rather confronting it with Mork.

Or, well. It would all be fine—if it weren’t for the times he catches Mork looking back.

It drives him positively insane every time Mork stares back when he thinks Pi dose'nt notice. Pi wouldn't have been if only he wasn't hyper-aware of Mork's every move. Those lip bites almost feels intentional. As if he was deep in thoughts and his eyes seems to coincidentally fixated on Pi.

Sometimes Mork would meets his gaze when he catches him, refuses to look away for a charged moment even if they’re both doing something, his eyes dark and intense—

It’s the kind of look that makes him want to scream and run away. He barely holds back a gasp. It makes his inside twist in a not-so-bad way.

It’s the kind of look that makes him want to cross a lone friends shouldn't. Aren't they already lingering around the edges

He dose'nt understand if its better or worse. .

There’s no intent to either of their gazes, he’s pretty sure. They’re really just looking—it’s not like they’d do anything about it. But it’s enough to stir up the memories in his mind, to make him yearn for that phantom kiss, to make him dream of doing it again. Sober.

He wants to pull his hair out

It’s enough to make him insane.

But he’s handling it. Really. The looks, the lust, the longing—it’s all under control.

Until it isn’t.

Tiny snippets of what to expect.

Lol. 50 chpaters. 100k words or more.

Maybe try reading it?