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Hazama - Blog Posts

1 year ago

Assclass Incorrect Quotes

Gakuhou: What are you drinking?

Gakushuu: Vodka.

Gakuhou: Straight?

Gakushuu: No, gay. Why?

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Gakuhou: Swear words are illegal now. If you say one you'll be fined.

Gakushuu: Heck.

Gakuhou: You're on thin fucking ice.

Gakuhou: Oh no-

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Koro-sensei: *gets set on fire and screams in agony*

Koro-sensei: Nah, I’m just kidding. Fire does nothing to me.

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Gakushuu, making coffee: This is going to fix everything.

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Gakushuu: Kill me nowwwww.

Isogai: Sorry, no can do. I need your help with my homework.

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Terasaka: Itona just insisted Hazama and I remember a code word in case we’re ever confronted by their clone or a cyborg doppelgänger and we’re not sure which is the real them and which is the imposter.

Terasaka: Some families have a fire escape plan, but not us.

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Karma, with a headache: Advil me up, daddy.

Rio: I will short out the language centre of your brain if you say anything like that ever again.

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Demon: Hey, I took your soul last month and-

Kayano: No returns.

Demon: *sobbing* But it's making me sad…

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*Terasaka falls over*

Hazama: Terasaka! Are you alright?

Terasaka: Is that you, God?

Hazama: What?

Terasaka: It's just, you sound a lot more like Hazama than I expected.

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Gakuhou: You’ll have a hard time believing this because it never happens, but I made a mistake.


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1 year ago

Assclass Incorrect Quotes

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Nagisa: Sometimes I drink milk straight from the container.

Terasaka: The cow??

Nagisa: What?

Itona: Terasaka, W H Y?

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Gakushuu: I’ve never been in a snowball fight before. I don’t know the rules.

Rio: What?

Gakushuu: Is there a point system, or is it to the death?

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Gakushuu, grinning: I have a knife!

Gakuhou: Put it down, Gakushuu.

Gakushuu: Make me! *sprints away*

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Hazama: Hey, quick question. How petty am I allowed to be?

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Koro-sensei: You need a hobby.

Gakuhou: I have a hobby!

Koro-sensei: Hitting Gakushuu isn't a hobby.

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Gakushuu: I think I need a hug...

Isogai: Good thing I'm hug shaped!

*45 minutes later*

Gakushuu: You... you can let go now.

Isogai: No, I absolutely cannot.

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Karasuma: Guys… the principal just called—

Irina: It was the octopus!

Koro-sensei: It was Karma!

Karma: It was Rio!

Rio: It was me!

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Gakushuu: How is spring not everyone’s favorite season? The trees are PINK, guys!

Karma: Allergies are also a problem, y'know.

Gakushuu: But pink.

Hazama: And it's hot.

Gakushuu: PINK!

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Rio: I’ve never asked someone out. How do you even do it?

Isogai: Oh, what I do is, I look them up and down and I say: “Hey… how you doin’?”

Gakushuu, scoffing: Oh, please.

Isogai, to Gakushuu: Hey, how you doin’?

Gakushuu:

Gakushuu: *giggles and blushes*

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Gakushuu: Would anyone know any good vendors for professional-quality brass knuckles?

Irina: I know you’re serious, but you say the scariest shit sometimes.


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