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Hi, I'm sorry if you aren't the best person to ask but i cant find anyone else but is it ablest of me to avoid verbally communicating even if I have the ability?
Like I can talk, and it's not particularly hard for me usually, but I feel more comfortable not doing it usually, especially during the times it does hurt. I'm autistic but I don't know if that's the reason why, and I worry it's inconsiderate to not do it by choice since some people don't have one.
Sorry again
It isn't ableist. I've said it before and I will say it again, everyone deserves a comfortable way to communicate. And for you, if using a way other than oral speech is more comfortable, do that!
You deserve to be comfortable, and if that means using AAC, sign, etc. to communicate even though you are speaking. Do it. Somebody who reblogged one of my posts said this, and I think it applies:
"Its called an aid for a reason. You don't NEED a jacket, but winter will be a lot easier if you have one.".
Also, the more people who use AAC the more normalized and available it'll become!
yknow what? shoutout to AAC users.
people don't acknowledge those who are nonspeaking/nonverbal and use any form of AAC, but you guys are just as valid as every other disabled individual
i hope your spoons are plentiful and today goes well for you <3 /gen
on tumblr lot more people know about it which great! that improve life of all AAC users. but pretty much with anything disability/developmental disability space on social media (which need certain amount of cognitive/intellectual & language abilities be on even if have support), good majority you see be teen & adult people who already literate learn language via speech n write *first* n then *independently* learn AAC base on it *later*.
especially symbol based AAC, but all AAC, is new system n hard n take long time learn even when you literate & not moderately severely cognitively disabled. but also, “literate teen/adult independent learn AAC” not at all full face of AAC user community.
as in like. experience of theirs. not universal. independently motivated & able to look up different AAC options different AAC apps, compare n contrast. download app n immediately know how to use, or able figure out by self. first time use app n may be clunky n slow, but make sentence on first try. need learn AAC, but most of that learning is for where words are (if button based), how exist as AAC user in public with confidence, etc. those all valid but not true for everyone who need AAC, especially not developmentally disabled children (& some adults) with complex communication needs.
most developmentally disabled children (n some adults) w complex communication needs who need AAC, can’t just hand them tablet with symbol based AAC app or text to speech AAC app n then wait for magic. many of them developmentally delayed in way, not taught in way that fit them (e.g. gestalt language processors), n their language abilities behind peers, so they can’t read, can’t spell, can’t grammar, etc.
some of them need learn where word is not by read word, sometimes not even by understand symbol, by other people press button n hear sound n associate that with meaning n location on AAC n symbol associate with it. in other words, they learning language alongside AAC.
for some their learn process look like, learn how use AAC say one word. n then much later, try make two word message, “want food” “go school.” “two word message” incredibly common goal for many these developmentally disabled children, teens, n even adults, that is something rare n truly extraordinary for that person that need be celebrated.
for others it look like learn by phrase (gestalt), then slowly break it down into smaller phrase n chunks n finally single words.
many of them babble (click random/seemingly random buttons on high tech device, stim with it, etc). but ultimately, won’t be able learn all by self. need be taught, see you accidentally spill water n crying, maybe you “feel” “sad”, n when that happen you “need” “help” from adult. need learn AAC by adults around them constantly model with it, constantly use it in conversation, show them how use. because they learning language along side it.
but also some of them don’t know what this thing in front of them (AAC… device, low tech boards or picture cards, etc) is. don’t know what communication is or you should do that. don’t know people exist who you should communicate to & with. heard many parents n SLP say they try model all time, try all kind of stuff, but child just not seem interested in it, don’t look at it, don’t touch it, don’t use it.
people who use AAC, not all them struggle with only speech. some them struggle with language, with intellectual/cognitive. some of them very developmentally delayed.
n some people, too disabled learn or use AAC. yeah, they exist.
for people who cannot use / cannot only use speech to be understood, AAC can be life changing. but is so much more complex thing. AAC still not as widely used n accepted n properly taught n supported as should, some parents n professionals n schools still many pushback n refuse. but sometimes answer to “have you tried AAC for them” is “yes, but they need long time n lots help to learn n we not very far yet even though spent long time on it” or “yes, but they simply not show interest even after constant model” or “god, wish can, but insurance only cover if show some amount of communication competence n ability use AAC, while only give 1 month trial, which simply not enough time” (wide spread thing that happen) or “yes. many types. it not work.”
for many AAC users & AAC user-to-be, it not as simple as “be handed AAC n check back in while they figure out by self”
not be able communicate by words means… constantly be misunderstood. misinterpreted. not have any way show own perspective, your side of story. your story always written talked about interpreted read thru other people.
someone did something wrong you. someone hurt you. someone say wrong thing…
someone make up malicious thing about you. maybe that you rude ungrateful bad temper behavior problem. it now become truth it now become you because there no way you correct them.
you can’t educate them. you can’t explain it to them. nevermind that, for example, you severely disabled n having symptoms that impact quality of life, or have symptoms that dare inconvenience people - can only watch as people around you speak “for” you not with your interest in mind but of their own selfishness - that people who can communicate by word say you only do that because you lazy, you selfish, want attention, on purpose, just want to for no reason, faking, inherent personality flaw.
not just big things. more often it those small things that build up every day, happen tens n hundreds of times each day, every day, every week, every month, every year… more often it those small things that add up that break you.
imagine everything bad, incorrect, & bad and incorrect thing said about you in your life. n now imagine you not able defend yourself, explain yourself, or even say those wrong not true.
n any attempt of yours to maybe protest, not enough, people not understand, or downright not listened to, made fun of. at first you shake head make noise meaning no all calm. after while of it not work you get frustrate n it start showing. you get impatient n snappy, why none of you understand, is any of you even trying. but people around you with privilege of able communicate n defend self thus never have experience of not have that, find it such basic of skill that they no longer see it as acquired skill but instead see as innate, born in, natural, cannot imagine person not have it just like can’t imagine living person not breathing—they only see their perspective n only see their interaction n not the many, hundreds n thousands, of previous communication where no one understood you (or even tried to). so they mock you (sometimes they the one who on purpose provoke you to see your reaction like you monkey in cage for their entertainment), geez big reaction why can’t you be patient. n you get label, impatient, rude, explosive, anger issues.
you protest in only way you can without words. you do it by sounds n noises n movement. you raise voice you scream you smash thing around you you hit yourself in frustration you hit other people who don’t understand you because you frustrated at their incompetence n how much they failing you. because. show me another way person can communicate without words. show me way that one can continue do after tens n thousands of misinterpretations n miscommunications n malicious interactions.
you communicate in only way you can with only emotion you can feel at this point: anger, frustration, helpless. be misunderstood, even smallest innocent one become trauma become trigger. miscommunication alone can set it off, make you see red n see billion of previous miscommunication where everyone failed you n left you to fend for self. then the backhanded jab that sometimes follow, that make thing exponentially worse.
you communicate in only way you can with only emotion left you can feel that consume you. loud sounds, screaming, get physical. it not earn you be understood. it only earn you this: be called impatient, irrational, explosive, land mine, rude, ungrateful, annoying…
“behavior issues.”
and that’s another misinterpretation of you you can’t defend yourself against. cycle repeats.
n other verbal people only listen to other verbal people. so these descriptions of you become “your truths”.
n the true you left there. to rot.
a lot people with no functional communication (either because no ability, or because circumstances) labeled as have behavior issues. yeah, no fucking shit. try it for a while. anyone would “have behavioral issues” in these circumstances.
no one seem to care. so okay fuck yeah am difficult kid, have behavioral issues, make your life miserable. yeah am terrible person, have internet personality flaw of no fault but my own. except now do it on purpose, make it true now, put ability to control own truth in own hand. because you all seem want me be that so bad. so now you get it. don’t complain now, you all asked for it really really nicely.
but deep down. at most basic. hidden beneath. really just. want be understood. want be helped. want people to learn my communication.
“many behavior is communication” yes, those kind of behaviors should be respected n valued n listened, but try behavior your way out of correcting n explaining everything just said in post to person who just don’t seem to get it
without rely on good grace of nice people around you who keep on play guess games n give out guesses in words you can nod or shake head to. now, that’s cheating.
people not nice to people who *have no choice* but to *only* rely on behaviors & vocal noises to communicate
n, even if every single person nice. behaviors n vocal noises alone, not enough.
this written with full time experience in mind
I want people to understand this.
Nonverbal and nonspeaking people are capable of going into higher education, and many have.
Does this mean every nonspeaking and nonverbal person will go into higher education? No. Lots of nonspeaking and nonverbal people are not able to go into higher education for various of reasons. This however does not mean that every nonspeaking and nonverbal person is unable to go into higher education.
College is something that a lot of people want, including nonspeaking/nonverbal people. If you’re able to, then go for it! If you want to, then go for it!
Nonspeaking/nonverbal people have been kept out of higher education for a very long time, and to see blog posts and articles about nonspeaking/nonverbal people going into higher education, it just makes my heart happy, because I’m not alone. Stop underestimating nonverbal/nonspeaking people. Stop saying we can’t do things. Some of us can’t, and that’s completely ok, but we need to start making it more possible for nonspeaking/nonverbal people to achieve their goals and dreams.