Curate, connect, and discover
Word count: 600
Author’s notes: I tried my best to research what things to do differently in a relationship with a neurodivergent partner as apposed to a neurotypical partner, but I apologize if I got anything wrong, as I’m neurotypical. I did, however, make sure not to take any information from Autism Speaks, because I’ve heard that they heavily misinform and are just overall harmful to support. Anyways, I hope you enjoy and please tell me if anything I’ve put in this is incorrect or just how I can make it more inclusive and realistic. :)
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Makoto:
He knew a little bit about what to do differently in a relationship with an autistic partner as opposed to a neurotypical
But he did still want to ask you what you preferred he do or don’t do, and asked if what he already knew was right or not
When you guys are talking, he’ll make sure to use physical tone indicators, to make it easier to understand the emotion behind what he’s saying.
You guys even made a system for what each tone indicator is, so you know for sure what each one is; like holding your pinky up to mean positive indication, and your thumb and pinky fingers to mean joking, etc.
I feel like Makoto would ask for consent to hug/touch you before doing so, even if you tell him you are okay with physical touch
Or on the other hand, if you tell him that you feel uncomfortable with physical touch, he’d make sure to show you he loves you in ways that are more comfortable for you
If you have a rocking stim, and are okay with it, he’ll hold your hand and give you a little bit more momentum so he can feel like he’s helping
The first time you get overwhelmed and overstimulated, he would notice, but it might take him a minute to think of what to do
He’d apologize after wards for not noticing sooner, but it really wasn’t that long before he acted, so it was okay
Stim toys. He would get tons of ads on his phone for different stim toys and would send pictures to you to ask if that’s something you think you’d want or need
He would make sure not to change anything without you knowing and okay-ing it; and because of his luck, changes- in routine or otherwise- wouldn’t often happen.
Hajime:
At first, he wasn’t sure what was different between being autistic or not, so he researched ‘do’s and don'ts of being in a relationship with a neurodivergent person’
He also sat down and talked with you about what works best for you personally
And he does a really good job of following those do’s and don'ts
He even watched for how you reacted to different things in daily life and adjusted what he would do based on what he knew you liked/didn’t like
If you are out with friends and get overstimulated, he’ll know right away and won’t hesitate to excuse the both of you from the situation so you can self soothe and stim, if needed
He makes sure to ask you how you’re feeling throughout the day, and asking what he can do to help
When you happily stim, he watches and smiles, because he knows that you’re happy. If it’s a movement stim (like pacing in circles) he might even join you, if you’re alright with it, so he can bond with you
He’s definitely protective over you, and will make sure that everyone knows he won’t let anyone bully you about being autistic
If you ever want to make a comfort corner, with different things that help you calm down; like specific textured blankets, colors, or even items, he’d help you make it and keep it ‘structurally sound’
If you’re watching your comfort movie or show for the 30th time, he just sits with you and rewatches as if he’d never seen it before. Or he’ll point out little things he didn’t notice before.
He’s very good at keeping to a routine, and will try to keep everything going as smoothly as he can for you