Curate, connect, and discover
I think we desperately need more focus on exorsexism/nbphobia & analysis of nonbinary place in society that doesn't just generalize binary experiences. It's very very exhausting seeing nonbinary things barely every get discussed UNLESS they can be grouped under transfem/transmasc issues.
& this is kind of hypocritical of me to say because I know that "nonbinary" is such an expansive term on purpose! and I like that! maybe we need different terminology because like both as someone who is equally a man and a woman (androgyne) & as someone who is agender+neutrois there are experiences I have that are not addressed by such binary-focused thinking. Even when people are inclusive of nonbinary people... you still rarely see discussions ABOUT androgynes or neutral people that center us and explore the ways we are treated AS nonbinary people. Like the ways that misandrogyny has made me feel scared of being androgynous & the feeling that androgyny is inherently ugly. The internalized distress of wondering if it's even possible to be transneutral when woman/manhood is so defined by community and there just isn't any of that for us (literally smth that caused a huge depressive episode a few months ago). The lack of awareness about alternative HRT/SRS. The lack of androgynous and neutral and third-gendered language for us to describe ourselves & our relationships. The way that a LOT of binary trans people throughout the modern history of the trans community consider/ed nonbinary identity ad a stepping stone towards binary identity, something lesser that you only do when you can't commit (hello biphobia!), AND as something that somehow makes you safer, you don't suffer as much- as if it's safer being physically androgynous around transphobes when it's your desired presentation- you arent as REAL. Literally transmeds will argue that exorsexism doesn't exist because it's all "just transphobia" and "not unique" (god that sounds familiar). The forced binarization of all of us & also the forced degendering of androgynes who are never allowed to be considered "real" men and "real" women. The idea that two transneutral people who present the same SHOULD be forced into the transmasc/transfem binary based on their AGABs because "that's all cis people see so it's what matters the most," which only serves to disconnect us from each other & silence us calling out the exorsexism we experience from those communities.
This got longer than I meant but tl;dr we deserve better methinks