Work On A List Of Names That Appeal To Him For You To Be Called By Him, His Friends, Your Friends, And

Yes, yes, pretend my vocabulary is a negative to firm up your safe space of self delusions and lies. Wallowing in fallacies doesn’t in fact dig you out of the hole you excitedly dug.

Your blog is utterly littered with biological hierarchy nonsense that you use to justify the delusional bullshit you pretend is a rebuttal to my opening comment.

Again, the main reason people so adamantly cling to this sort of disinformation peddling is a lack of capability to earn a woman’s respect on equal footing. They need an imbalanced power dynamic as the starting point so they can pretend their inept interpersonal skillset is actually a personal strength.

The nonsensical rant as reply was, of course, not at all actually relevant to reply to. The gish gallop of BS thrown out as desperate effort to justify advocating a society of weak men who don’t have to actually fully earn a woman’s submission by pretending the deck is innately and biologically stacked is the same bullshit rapists use to justify their biological urge to rape people.

Good stuff if you’re emotionally stunted and prefer women who accept emotionally and developmentally stunted men as the norm for society, I suppose.

I’ve wasted entirely too much time platforming these ineptly framed and utterly nonsensical views and the fallacious rhetoric these folks use for justification of them.

Feminism as the foundational point of a relationship is the only method that exists for a woman to submit to a man. Half baked discussions of capitalism and misplaced understanding of our social ills suits you... Wallow in it along with your fallacies used as deflection some more, though.

dictionary.cambridge.org

feminism

1. the belief that women should be allowed the same rights, power, and…

Make it make sense…

My D/s Isn’t Perfect

My dash is full of beautiful women kneeling peacefully, perfectly composed men holding a drink, and proclamations of the things “true” Doms/Daddies/Masters do.

“True” Doms never lose their cool, get sick, feel cranky, need time off, cry, or ever disappoint their subs… 

But mine he does. 

“True” subs are never defiant, disagreeable, grouchy, bratty, defensive, pouty, or misbehaved.

But I am.

Real D/s has depth. It has problems. It has bad days. We don’t publicize the days it feels impossible, where one or both of us is tired/cranky/hungry/stressed out, and definitely not when BOTH of us feel that way.

Sometimes I can’t find my surrender; I feel defensive, sensitive, self-righteous, and victimized. You don’t see how I sometimes struggle to kneel in front of him, swallowing my pride and biting my tongue. Or the times I check out, switch off, tune out, just get through my tasks and purposely not feel a thing.

My Master has done all of the things that the internet says he’s not supposed to. But for me, by showing me his vulnerability and allowing me to love him through the messiness, that’s what makes him REALLY a true man.

This is the dynamic I’ve always dreamed of and fantasized about and I consider myself lucky to live it 24/7 in real life with a partner that I adore. I truly believe we make one another better in this dynamic, living out our chosen roles.

But it’s far from perfect. And I actually think we’re both better for the struggles. I’ve found an incredible amount of growth, transformed my life, and found deeper levels of intimacy, connection, desire, and communication than I could have ever imagined in the trials we’ve had together.

It’s not what you see on Tumblr, but it’s real.

Everybody knows (due to an overfocus of imbalanced fetishized content) that in D/s there is an exchange of power where the Dom shapes the submissive to suit the Dom’s needs.

However, this isn’t the full scope of how a D/s dynamic actually works in a successful practice. Toward that end here is a brief explainer on some of what too often gets left out.

Two of the most commonly overlooked facts/elements of D/s instruction are:

1. Both participants are equals

If you find yourself himming and hawing about this fact, you have a lot to learn and it is good that you are reading this! Both participants are equals. D/s is exactly a Yin Yang energy flow dynamic. If it is not then it is not going to be a successful D/s dynamic.

Most of what you see online lacks the balance and perspective that actually underpins a successful dynamic.

Ultimately what is demonstrated in these is simply a fetishization of one part of the energy flow. It is the visually appealing element of the power exchange in action. A scene such as one where a submissive is crawling on a leash as the Dominant leads them to the place where the submissive will demonstrate their enthusiasm and commitment to pleasing the Dominant through various and perverse acts, a sub being spanked, choked, slapped, spit on, or whatever it is that arouses the energy flow’s enthusiastic exploration from the participants.

However, what is usually not made clear is that the participants chose from a position of equality to explore these acts together. That the submissive can pause, change, or immediately end the entire experience with the utterance of a word.

That the submissive has the responsibility of guiding the Dom when the Dom is not easily finding the connection for the energy flow. it is a dance that requires two equal partners. Yes, in the fetishized element there is a gifting from the submissive to the Dominant of power, rights, and decision-making. This is because the submissive wants to be guided through experiences that they will have difficulty experiencing without guidance from someone who takes those controls and manages them on behalf of the submissive.

2. A sub shapes a Dom to suit the sub’s needs

(There is a fine line between “topping from the bottom“ and D/s energy flow with a submissive who is participating in the energy flow submissively from the bottom, but that’s going further into the weeds. Then this general post is intending to address. Maybe I’ll get more into that later in another post.)

Every healthy D/s inclusive energy flow relationship or scenario requires that two equal partners get together and negotiate what the nature of their relationship or experiences are going to be. A Dominant cannot truly fulfill a sub’s needs without the input of the submissive.

BDSM is a growth experience where communication put into practice defines the focus of exploration. When a submissive simply goes along with whatever their Dominant wants, but yet is not happy with the result, that submissive is harming and undermining the success of the relationship or scenario.

Submissives have a required element of participation in communicating their needs and shaping the experiences that are pursued. In a successful and healthy dynamic, the Dom is shaped by the interests and needs of the submissive.

It is a common misconception that all that occurs in a DS relationship or scenario is that a submissive simply serves the Dominant in whatever way the Dom demands. Again, this is because the only part of the overall experience that is fetishized is the best case practice moment. Yes, in the best case practice moment, the Dominant is using the sub’s power to direct and control the activities the sub practices as the sub responds to the demands of the Dom. What you don’t see in that snapshot, is the fact that the sub is performing acts that appeal directly to the interests that the submissive has within the experience.

For some subs, it is indeed simply a service kink. What they get out of it is an opportunity to successfully servicing their Dominant’s demands. However, in order for the Dominant to lead them in an experience that is successful, the Dominant has to understand the things that are going to cause the submissive to be pulled out of their enjoyment.

The submissive is giving a gift, but that gift has to be exercised in a way that is successful.

Success requires that the Dominant stay within the boundaries of the submissive and only present things that challenge the submissive in ways that ultimately lead into the submissive’s enjoyment rather than caused the submissive to drop out of their enjoyment.

Of course, there will be things that are presented that are challenges for the sub to maintain as they demonstrate their enthusiasm for servicing their dominant. Things that the Dominant wants from the sub, but that might not be directly appealing to the sub. Things that can be explored as part of an overall journey that leads back into the sub’s enjoyment.

Oftentimes, the Dominant will lead the sub through things that please the dominant by using an energy flow focus that appeals to the submissive.

Working together in advance of a scenario is an essential part of planning for success. Negotiating about the kind of energy and acts that the participants are comfortable exploring increases the possibility for success in a relationship or scenario.

Having rules that work for everyone is always a good way to frame romantic sexual obedience

mercy has a rule that I put in place years ago that states when I ask to see her tits she will show them to me as soon as she can. mercy sent me this one from work 2 minutes after I requested it.

Isn't she such a good girl?

Vacuous and ignorant use of multiple fallacies is a typical form of self defense for those needing to pretend they have a biological right above others as a mask for their lack of ability to earn it.

The “bounces off of me and sticks to you” rebuttal from this oddly flailing patriarchy blog is just a little icing on the cake of the deflective and self absorbed dysfunction inherent in patriarchy obsessed nonsense peddlers.

Make it make sense…

Feminism is the essential truth that women and men begin from a position of deserving intrinsically equal rights, power, and value. A submissive woman can choose to gift any amount of her power to another person if she wishes. This doesn’t change her intrinsically equal right to that power or to revoke that other person’a access to that power.

The only people presenting positions that differ from this general principle are inept and abusive men who lack the personal capacity to be worthy of a woman’s submission.

It really is this simple.

It believes this x feminist bitch was its feminist trainer in school

My favorite thing about introducing edging and denial is the predictability of the events that follow:

You’re in utter disbelief that someone would actually deny an orgasm.

Then comes the anger and frustration. How dare someone try to keep you from your orgasm! Perhaps some attitude will need correcting at this stage.

Soon you’ll be begging. Bartering. Negotiating. Trying anything to prove that you deserve that orgasm.

Maybe you’ll cry when you finally realize that it’s truly out of your control. You have no influence. Your body and its pleasure are no longer a priority or even relevant to the conversation.

And when kept denied, you’ll realize: you’re better without an orgasm. You’re a better sub, better plaything, better toy. You’re more obedient. Your partner knows what you need better than you, and you realize they were right: you don’t need to orgasm.

Then the addiction starts.

The neediness in your body settles as a new default state of being… you would feel empty without it. Directionless.

And suddenly, the same sub who said they could *never* handle be denied is confessing that being told no feels better than being allowed to orgasm.

I’m not sure who to attribute this to, but it is this type of content we need more blogs to be posting

Do you actually have kids? You said you don't want any more. How do you manage your relationship dynamic around having a family?

Yes we do. We make sure we keep all dynamic stuff away from the kids, and just have to wait until they’re in bed or not home to do anything sexual. It makes it harder and it puts limits on what you can realistically do but we make it work.