Latest Posts by an-anxious-asexual-otaku - Page 4

Dancing as usual. (at Jacksonville Zoo and Gardens)

Went to the zoo and took pictures of a squirrel. (at Jacksonville Zoo and Gardens)

My drawings in progress always look weirdly creepy...

Five hours of work to make a hand and now I’m too scared of messing it up to try and make it the appropriate size...

Check me out! Makin art and stuff.

This is why her shoulder piece started breaking near the end of the night...

Check out my sister! All dressed up and stuff! (at WasabiCon)

Look! It’s One Punch Man in the flesh! (at WasabiCon)

Now all three pets have fallen into the pool. Poor thing’s traumatized now.

Man, I went to the zoo for my older sisters birthday today. It was tons of fun. There was a Latin festival sort of thing happening and we had some Cuban food and watched a Mexican dance ceremony that I think was based around Aztec culture specifically. It was pretty cool, and so were all the animals we saw. However, I am now absolutely exhausted and I'm pretty sure my nose is sunburnt. Also, I have the worst case of farmers tan now so just fuck my life, right?

Anyways, happy birthday to my big sister, I guess. *shrugs before collapsing on bed*

So I watched sausage party with my parents yesterday. Now I'm watching food wars today. And I've just realized... I've essentially been watching food porn this entire time. And it's been awesome! Extra comment: I absolutely love Soma! He's hilarious and adorable! He makes this anime amazing! I'm loving it! Especially when he decides to have people try his terrible calamari concoctions!

It is 8 AM and I went to sleep four hours ago...

Why the fuck am I awake? There is no reason for this. I was sleeping. But now I can't. What is this fresh hell of getting up at the crack of dawn when I have no pressing matters to deal with today? Why didn't I sleep longer when I tried to go back to sleep? What the fuck is this?!

What the fuck is this... I have "Bop to the Top" from high school musical stuck in my head and I have no idea why. I haven't heard that song in like a year, at least. ... I blame tumblr.

Goddamnit. A really good manga series I like is only being sold on amazon and each of the volumes are less than five dollars. But they're all Japanese because, apparently, nobody cared enough to create or sell English translated ones... *sigh* Now I have to fucking learn how to read Japanese characters. God-fucking-damnit...

One time, in my freshman year of high school, there was this huge assembly that happened in the school’s auditorium. That or it was a performance of some kind, but that’s not really important.

After the “whatever it was” ended, I left with all of the other students to get back to my classroom. While I was walking into the main school building, I noticed a teeny tiny frog sitting on the ground beside some bushes. It was about the size of a thumbnail and nobody else seemed to notice it, so I went over and stood by it to make sure that no one would step on the poor thing on accident. After a while, everyone had already made their way inside the building and I was still just stood there with a tiny frog, trying to think of a way to coax the thing back into the bushes without touching it. (I touch my face a lot and the school bathrooms were terrifying, so touching things like frogs is not a good idea) 

Then, out of nowhere, the schools new principal came over and asked me what I was doing. I pointed out the frog and he kind of just stood there for a second like, “you just made yourself late to class to protect a frog?” Then he just laughed a bit, picked up the frog, and plopped the tiny thing onto some leaves in the bushes. Then he just told me to get to class before I got in trouble for being late.

Pretty mush everybody in my school hated our new principal for being a hard-ass. I, however, gave him my full support. All because he decided to help me out and rescue that tiny frog.

IT’s the little things like that that make the world seem like a better place.

*is pouting*

What the hell, Funimation...

I was in the middle of watching “Handa-Kun” and you just went and crushed my dreams like the assholes you are. How rude, deciding to do scheduled maintenance in the middle of my binging.  

I even decided to start watching your shit yesterday and this is how you repay me. With buffering, glitches, and maintenance induced shut downs. Damn it...

Well, at least I finished watching “Servamp” beforehand. I would have been incredibly annoyed if I had been forced to take a break in the middle of that. I would have to put in the effort to find the anime elsewhere as quickly as possible. And, given how apathetic I am by nature, that would have been a pain in the ass. Too much effort.

Y’know, I really felt connected to Kuro and his laziness in Servamp. I pretty much agreed every time he said things were too much trouble. Personally, I would very much prefer to just laze around doing fuck all instead of going out and trying to help people. Then again, I don’t have the same reasoning as Kuro does when it comes to a lot of his apathy so, I suppose, I can’t really talk.

Whatever...

*sighs*

God damnit, Funimation. Finish your fucking maintenance already!

Decided to finally watch “Kiss Him, Not Me” today

So...

This:

And this:

Fucking murdered me.

I instantly screamed and oozed out of my desk chair and onto the floor to hyperventilate for just a bit. Holy hell! I was genuinely not expecting any of that. My heart has exploded and I have no regrets but, damn it, I need a minute to just calm down after that.

Oh my god...

Every time I look up and see him in that second picture I die just a little bit.

This is my favorite episode, by far.

Second favorite, however is the fourth one because of...

This!

And Fucking!

THIS!

RIGHT HERE!

*inarticulate screaming*

WHY CAN’T THIS JUST BECOME YURI! I WANT MORE YURI, DAMN IT!!!! FUCK THE HETERO PAIRINGS! JUST MAKE IT GAY!!!!!!

*cries*

*sighs*

I suppose the other pairings aren’t too bad though...

Mutsumi is my favorite.

He is the sweetest little cinnamon roll! He loves her without question and he just genuinely enjoys spending time with everyone! It’s so adorable! He never has a hidden motive like the others and I’m constantly worried that he’ll suddenly get one later on but he never does and it’s literally the best thing ever! I just want to give him a hug for the rest of my life!

*screams*

This was literally the best scene from the anime. I love Victuuri and all but, fuck, this was hilarious!

Breaking :

Hug deprived Zombie on the loose, claims human hugs.

Stay safe, (..•˘_˘•..)

I wholeheartedly agree with this mindset!

I’m shocked he even got out the first time...

Huh.. Interesting… It’s not your first time…

I relate to this anime too much...

Also, I WANT MORE FUJOSHI/FUDANSHI FRIENDS TOO!!!!!!

WAR FRIENDS

Y’know, I’ve always been pretty bad at keeping track of time. I can lose an entire week without realizing it.

Recently, I had no idea that Christmas was about to happen because I completely lost track of time. I only realized it when me and my dad went to the store and the guy there asked if we were ready for Christmas and suddenly I asked when that was happening and he replied that it was only six days away.

But, the worst thing about all of this is probably the fact that I still lose track of the date even with two huge calendars hanging on the wall behind my desk... 

Y’know, I had this weird plan to separate myself from everyone. I figured if I just left and didn’t look back, then I could just stay by myself and nobody would bother me.

The plan was super simple. Just stop going to school, don’t make unnecessary contact online, and tell everyone when you see them that your doing fine by yourself. Tell them you prefer being by yourself, and they’ll leave you alone.

It worked.

The plan worked perfectly and, for the most part, I’m alone again.

I’m alone again.

Nobody really cares about me or my life. about the things that I like or dislike. Sometimes they say they do but I don’t really believe them. I have no reason to. It’s not like they’ve given me one. They’re always lying about themselves anyways. Hiding things from me, only to say them when they think I’ve left the room. That’s fine. I get that. The need to vent about your feelings is understandable and I’m not a very nice person to begin with, so I get why people don;t like me.

I wish that they did though.

I don’t like being alone.

I say that I do, but that’s not really true.

I just don’t like being scared and that’s all I ever seem to feel when I’m around people. I’m scared that I’ll mess up somehow and they’ll hate me like so many others already do.

(they all left me)

I hate that.

I hate that part of me that everyone seems to despise.

(all of me they hate all of me and so do i because i should)

That part of me relishes in those terrible feelings, in being feared and looked at with disgusted eyes. That part of me thinks it’s hilarious how much these feelings affect the rest of me.

“It’s fine.” She says with her sickening smiles and empty eyes.

(terrifying monster makes me sick want to vomit)

“It’s not.” I mutter because I’m too tired to say it louder.

(so tired just want sleep stop it let it stop please)

It’s always been like this and that’s not fine but it also is.

(its not it never was)

Because I’m worthless and that’s just how it is has been and always will be.

(it hurts)

That’s fine.

(its not)

I’m not though.

(im not)

...

The plan worked.

(it hurts)

I’m alone again.

(i didnt want it)

I’m not as happy about that as I thought I’d be.

(i wasnt happy to begin with)

(we never were)

Bisexual Struggles

So I have a specific group of people that I would usually hang out with in chorus. One of those people is a rather sweet and adorable girl named Kirsten and another is an awesome and attractive guy named Daniel. 

I was quite happy to call them my friends and was even happier when they actually invited me to go and hang out with them outside of chorus. 

Then I realized that I might have a thing for Kirsten. Then that thing exploded and I had to restrain myself from constantly coming onto my, probably straight, female friend. 

Then she started dating Daniel, which was fine.

Until I started to develop a thing for him as well. Then things got complicated.

Kirsten is wonderful and I enjoy hanging out with her but I also really enjoy hanging out with Daniel. So I accepted when I was invited to hang out with them at the shopping center nearby. This became a problem because I ended up hanging out with only Kirsten for a good portion of the first time and then both times I ended up sharing all of my food and his food with Daniel.

This was awesome for me because I had always wanted to be able to share space and food and belongings with the people I’m close to. I tend to get kind of clingy when I really like people and I really liked both of them.

Unfortunately, as I mentioned before, they were dating each other. 

So, over the course of three months, I developed two incredibly painful crushes on two absolutely amazing people that I didn’t even stand a chance with.

My response to this predicament was the only possible solution I could come up with.

I failed all of my classes and decided not to go to college anymore. 

And that’s the end of that.

*sighs wearily*

My friends and I talk too much shit sometimes...

Amber:Alex, can I kill Brianna as well for her memes?

Me: YOU CANNOT STOP THE MEMES! i SHALL NEVER DIE!!!

Amber: I am the reaper and I will kill you and take your soul.

Alex: I am a psycho and there will be blood, suffering, laughing, and slaughter.

Me*shouting*: I don't have a soul! And who the fuck do you think you are trying to kill! I've killed gods and destroyed universes, Fucker! Fucking come at me with your weak ass reaper self!

Me*in a calmer voice*: Have fun, Alex. Save some meat for me when your done.

Alex: There will be enough meat for all.

Me: Cool.

Fujoshi Struggles

So I finally watched “Yuri on Ice” recently and it was much better than I expected it to be. Especially since I don’t really like watching sports anime. I keep listening to the soundtrack and quietly crying.

However, it spoiled me so I took forever trying to find something else just as good.

I ended up reading through the manga for “Ajin” which was pretty good and then reread this absolutely adorable manga called “How to Keep a Mummy” and then wound up reading “Nanbaka” because it looked colorful and possibly gay so I figured, “Why the heck not.”

Then I had to watch the anime and my heart just completely exploded. Fucking Jyugo and his amazing eyes and crazy knife hands. He needs all of the hugs and his misfortune makes my soul hurt.

Then I spent a while being upset about finishing both the manga and the anime and figured I’d just wander through the “yaoi” tag on tumblr to drown in my sorrows. Then I found “No. 6″.

I died again and I’m not sure how much more I can really take at this point. 

The world has become so much gayer recently and I think that’s awesome.

So I attend WasabiCon every year, here in Jacksonville, and for the past two years I’ve been hosting a karaoke panel. I also hosted an Anime Scene-it panel this past year but that’s not what I’m here to talk about.

This past year, I decided to have a bit of fun with the karaoke panel by including a particular song that I called, “Deadpool’s Theme”. I asked everyone if they knew the song and wanted to sing it. Nobody was really sure what the song was so I offered to play it for them. Then I pressed play and suddenly Rick Astley comes up on the big screen and everyone starts screaming and getting up to dance and sing with me.

It was kind of great.

Coming out

So I found out I liked girls in high school and, when I did, I told my parents.

 Their response was, “Oh, ok, that’s cool. Just don’t make any concrete decisions yet, alright? Cus’ you never know when you might want to give something new a try.”

Also, “Don’t be an angry lesbian, ok? Cus’ we know a few of those and they’re really annoying to deal with.”

Right. So keep an open mind and don’t be pissed off about life. I can deal with that.

Hello!

Hello, Tumblr! I am here to tell everyone about my life because I am bored and some of my life is relatively interesting, I think. So I will attempt to add at least one random thing every day. However, I will start off with five things today! So lets get started!