No Capes! Batfam, But They Still Stop Crime Just By Accident

Batfam quotes as things my family has said

Dick and Jason: drunk

Jason: ever notice how Tim glows in the dark.

Dick: huh?

Jason: He glows in the dark! Just look.

Dick: *looks over* woooooah... you're right. It's because he's so pale.

Tim: What are you guys talking about?

Dick: Your pale skin. Don't worry I love pale skin... I love ALL skin.

Jason: Nice save.

Tim: Become Robin they said, gain a family they said...

Ok, but like...

There's "danger zones" in Wayne Manor.

These are areas where watching for falling objects, dangerous projectiles, murderous vigilante baby, and a plethora of other hazards.

For example, the main foyer is a danger zones.

Dick, with his acrobatic tendencies, has broken over 23 chandeliers. Thankfully, he's never been hurt. He just hangs on the chandeliers and tends to loosen them. Then tend to fall later, when unexpecting people are walking underneath. Jason has dubbed it the "phantom chamber" in lieu of the falling chandelier in phantom of the opera.

Damian’s room is also a danger zone. For obvious reasons.

I love how everyone has weird nicknames for Tim. Point in case: Timberly

“wow it must suck being the only teen titans member without superpowers”

tim drake, with an unlimited number of memes: “are u kidding”

My brother: explaining Fortnite for the 50th time.

Me: confused af, but happy to have a conversation that doesn't involve arguing.

Him: You get what I'm saying.

Me: Absolutely not, but I'm happy you're happy bud.

AITA for not killing my son’s murder?

I’m a well-off parent (36M). This story is about one of my children (15m), who I will call J for the sake of privacy.

One day J and I got into a particularly bad fight bc I accused him of murder. After this J went to search for his bio mom. However, due to reasons that will remain unspecified, my son died in a terrorist attack.

After finding J’s body, I decided to hunt down and kill my his murder. However by the time I found the man, my friend (34M) stopped me from taking his life.

Should I have gone through with it anyways? Should my son remained unavenged?

Edit: My new son believes I made the right choice.

Edit-Edit: GOOD NEWS: J IS ALIVE

Edit-Edit-Edit: BAD NEWS: HE IS NOT PLEASED WITH MY CHOICE.

Edit-Edit-Edit-Edit: Slit my J’s throat to stop him from killing his murder.

Edit-Edit-Edit-Edit-Edit: J’s coming over for brunch!

*GASP*

I found the webtoon...

Best day I've had since I discovered they have a legit Ramen shop at the mall.

Everything about this webtoon is amazing.

Go read it.

No, really.

Do it.

Download Webtoon and find the Batman comic, it's not hard to miss.

Batfam quotes as things my family has said

Damian: *gasp* I lost all my progress on Cheese Vikings!

Tim: You're displaying more emotion than you did when I was shot.

Damian: Of course I did, it's Cheese Vikings you uncultured swine.

Batfam quotes as things my family has said

Okay, so this one is long. Legit this happened yesterday.

*whole family is going out for dinner*

Tim: *locks the door before leaving the manor* okay, everyone ready to go? I'm starving.

Bruce: Alfred, did you get the house key?

Alfred: ... no master Bruce. You grabbed the car keys, I assumed you grabbed the house keys.

Bruce: oh... well... oops?

Jason: You, Bruce Wayne, Batman, "world's greatest detective", have locked yourself out of your own manor.

Bruce: ...

Jason: *wheeze*

Damian: Drake, look what you did. Not only did you lock us out of the manor, but you have humiliated father!

Tim: wtf, how is this MY fault!?

Damian: tt useless.

Tim:... you little-

Dick: whoa! Let's all calm down! We're all a little hangry and not thinking straight.

Steph: yo, I didn't get my phone. It's in the kitchen.

...

Bruce: *sigh* let me get a sledgehammer.

Alfred: master Bruce, there must be a less destructive way to enter the manor.

Bruce: Alfred, I've spent millions of dollars on our security system. This is the least destructive method.

*leaves to get the sledgehammer*

*a couple minutes later.*

Bruce: how... how did you?

*Cass standing next to the open door*

Cass: credit card!

Jason: million dollar security system my ass.

Quick one animatic because it heals me Music: 「 Middle Of The Night 」- Stave remix - 「Amv/Edit 」- || HellFx ||

Batfam quotes as things my family has said (and done)

*whole family is sitting in the living room*

Jason: *coughs*

Tim: *dives off the couch and slams into wall trying to get away from Jason*

Jason: What the hell. I don't have the plague...