If Only I Had An Obsession Who I Could Actually Interact With. Who I Could Actually Talk With, Get To

I feel like I'm one gained kg away from taking an hammer to my Jaw so I couldn't eat solid foods again.

I cant cope with having to go to work. Maybe if I could do some physical work outside, but only places available are customer service. I can't cope with having to work as a server or a cashier till I get my degree. How do people do it, why do people do it. Why do they live.

I can't bring myself to do anything. I just keep giving up and failing every day, just again and again.

I'm so miserable all the time. Being alone, just in my room used to be my fun time, my comfort time, the time I lived for. But now I'm just miserable.

I'm less miserable in school then at after it ends. My days consist of wishing the current moment to end. But the near future is never any less horrible since im stuck in a circle of agony. And I can't get out.

This is supposed to be the best time of my life. But I feel like this, how tf is life gonna be like in the future. Worse obvs cause I haven't gotten better since I was like 11.

I wish my parents didn't love, wish I wasn't aware that me killing myself would destroy them. Wish I could just end me existence, at the end of the day that's what I want the most.

I cant bring myself to do anything. I have so much to do, but I don't do anything. It feels like I'm incapable of everything. I just want to not exist anymore. Just not be.

How are you doing?

You seem quite stressed for your graduation but I'm sure you did great at school. 🌟

Hey, thank you for asking, and thank you for the cute gif :>

Tbh I don't know how I'm doing haha. To be honest, it just depends on how well I am able to tune out everything at a certain moment lmao

I cant do this anymore, I just wish I could die. I will never be able to be happy in this body, I'll never be able to be something, never be able to be a normal functional person. My body is my biggest enemy, I'm my biggest enemy. And I wanna kill it, I wanna kill it so bad.

A bot just messaged me, advertising a sketchy dating site. I might have attracted the wrong energy lol

What do I have to do to attract a yandere?? Do I have to summon them with a ritual, bring a sacrifice??

Maybe one of the reasons I feel so much younger than I am is because I am stuck in the same place where I was when I was much younger. I have grown, gotten new experiences, changed as a person. But at my core I am still a little girl who just keeps wishing they wouldn't have to exist anymore.

Atp I have straight up food addiction. It makes me act completely unrational, makes me do things that I would never do elsewhere. And once I get it, it's never enough. Feels like I have no consciousness almost.