Fluid

a belief i hold with fervor is that there is no collective “best” of anything, it’s all objective.

obviously some things can be measured by their success, or efficiency, or attraction, but the idea of greatness, or first place, is completely objective. everyone will hold different things to different standards.

i say all of this because i think most people who love believe that their love interests are the most divine humans on the planet, and i don’t think they’re wrong.

i think a bunch of people can be the most divine people on the planet if they’re just considered the “most” divine by one person, because love has no rules and we’re all in our own conscience anyway.

moral of the story is that everything and everyone is uniquely significant and loved among every individual and i think that’s beautiful, and if something is “the best” to you then it just is the best. because it’s you, and your life type shit

i say idgaf and then im still dreaming about my childhood best friend

Love May be in my near future we Might be so back

Recently I’ve been feeling so off, and it’s really starting to weigh on me. I know a lot, if not most, of my symptoms are caused by my own bad habits, but I just can’t stop giving into the facade of safety in familiar distractions.

The part that’s affecting me the most is the fact I have just not been able to feel anything for like. Days now. And I am usually a lot more neurotic, but I have just not been able to feel much of anything at all lately, and I’m not gonna lie it’s kind of scary. And the worst result of this apathy, is the fact that I seem to have nothing to say lately. I just feel so much less lively than usual. It’s harder to start and continue conversations with my friends, when I love talking to them more than anyone else, and I feel so because of it. I think I’m able to conceal it relatively well, at least I hope so, but I don’t know. This post also kind of negates the whole secret thing.

This is kind of stupid, I just didn’t have much to say when talking to some friends earlier and it made me sad. I feel so numb Aughh Aughh

I hate Christmas

noah jupe as otis lort in honey boy (2019) dir. alma har’el

If you feel like you’re ugly and lame just lie to yourself. Like say “Ohhhh my goddd I feel so awesome and sexy haha I am the most goated transvestite in this room rn” three times in front of the mirror and then you’ll feel better

i gotta end my shit for real