Tim, making chicken and dumpling soup, dropping a dumpling on the floor: This is sadder than the time I lost my spleen.
Bruce, choking on his coffee: Excuse me?
I've seen this before
petition to rename the usa ‘south canada’
Roleswap AU, where their powers are the same, but it’s their origin stories that get swapped.
Clark Kent really should have known better than to break into a sketchy biochemistry lab during a thunderstorm, especially with the amount of flagrant OSHA violations.
On war-torn Arcera, Clan Allehnz hires a smuggler to take their youngest chicks to safety, days before the final nuclear exchange.
Sister Diana of the Order of Themyscira is chosen to take on the mantle of a fallen Lady of Justice, and with it, the duty to spread truth and justice to the galaxy.
Hal Jordan, crown prince of the lost city of Oa, falls through the Veil protecting them from outsiders after a dare gone wrong.
Bruce Wayne only discovers that he’s the heir to the Night Court, largest of Gotham’s Fae Courts, after his parents are assassinated by a rival for the Shadowed Throne.
Arthur Curry, only son of a wealthy shipping magnate, uses his inherited wealth, relics and magic to stop evildoers by night and protect the sea and its inhabitants by day.
When Bruce met Bernard, he was skeptical. He respects Tim's choice of partner don't get him wrong, but something about the boy triggers his paranoia.
Bernard is on his way to getting a dual PhD in physics and biology. (Rouge gallery are mostly doctorates)
He spouts conspiracies with passion. (Some were close to the truth and contain details that a normal civilian shouldn't know)
When discussing said theories he has this manic look in his eyes. (also this child is an ex-member of a pain cult)
It didn't help that one day when Bernard was visiting Tim is the manor the boy casually said "You know Gotham's cave system are so interesting. They span across the city and from my research, bats tend to migrate here, especially in the area around Wayne Manor." (Bernard was working on a conspiracy about how Batman is actually an alien pretending to be vampire by mimicking bats and failing.)
Later that night, Bruce has Bernard's profile under the 'potential rogue list' Right next to Tim's name.
Imagine being Alfred during Batman Begins when Bruce leaves to “find himself.” Alfred is worried, but reminds himself that all rich men do this and he’s probably just going to come back as a worldly, obnoxious vegetarian. Then Bruce shows up several years later buff as hell and it’s like no, he’s a ninja. he’s a ninja and he wants to terrorize Gotham in a bat costume.
Thanks for the tag, @yesalwayswelles
Tagging: @movieexpert1978 @wingsy-keeper-of-songs @blackthornprime @phantomdragoness @djsavetheworld @hauntedluminarybbq @whereserpentswalk @sunnyxjarrus @helkrokodillenz @spinelfan11 @royal-tea-blogs @guardianspirits13
This was pretty fun ╰(˵ヘωヘ✿)╯
My favorite thing about the bats is that… they are gothamites. And sure they scare the shit out of people… but they are in Gotham. Superman is loved by his people, Flash is adored, people pray to Wonder Woman, Green Arrow is feared. But the Bats? The Bats are like all of Gotham's weird older brothers/sisters/parents. Superman and Green Lantern are visiting Batman in Gotham and all of a sudden he gets smacked in the face by a banana and they turn and find a group of teens skateboarding away and one kid calls over his shoulder ‘eat the fucking potassium you absolute brick.’ and Batman doesn't even do anything. Barry is chilling with Nightwing when a girl runs beneath the building they are sitting on and screams “Nice ass Night! But get it the fuck down here, my cats stuck in a tree.” And Nightwing does a flip off the building and just?? helps her?? Wonder Woman and Black Canary are passing through Crime Alley on their way to the Batcave and spot Red Hood standing in an alley, being lectured by a woman who is half his size and she ends the lecture by throwing two sandwiches at his face and walking away. Red Hood just takes his hood off and starts eating. Superboy is helping Red Robin defeat Scarecrow and while they’re hiding, waiting for him to walk into their trap, RR is casually conversing with a Gothamite about Hogwarts Houses, and when he says the Gothamite looks like a Gryfindor he pops his head out and screams “Yo scarecrow hes right fucking here!” J’onn is heading to the Manor to discuss League business with Bruce when he spots Robin(Damian) fighting Riddler all alone and is about to intervene when three teenagers show up and just fucking deck him instead. Damian doesn't thank them, just glowers, and one of the guys goes “you're welcome you fucking brat.” And the girl even smacks the back of his head and goes “manners.” Clark is sent to go find Tim and Steph and Damian and finds them at this girls birthday party, in full costume, eating cupcakes and drinking punch, jumping on the bouncy house and is like “errr, B-Batman needs you home.” And as one the entire birthday party group went “Fuck Batman.” Spoiler was spotted painting these guys nails, Black Bat was seen teaching calculus to a group of teenagers, Batgirl(Babs) was running after a group of kids screaming “Give me back my laptop you fucks!” Just- just the batfamily and Gothamites being annoying to each other and appreciative yet bitches.
Bus driver: stop getting thrown at my fucking bus, i got places to be and my insurance only covers so many shatter windshields and person sized dents Batman: I don't really control where I get thrown Bus Driver: well you better fucking start otherwise theres gonna be another fucking villain on these streets *drives away and almost runs him over* Superman: *gaping* yo-you're just gonna let him do that? Batman: *shrugs* Gotham insurance aint what its cracked up to be Superman: *staring dumbly*
Nick Fury’s Flashback
Dick: Happy Chrismis!
Damian: What is Happening.
Tim: Is Chrismimth.
Damian: what are you fools-
Steph: Merry Crisis!
Damian: Father, they have lost their minds.
[All four stare at Bruce expectantly]
Bruce, sighing: Merry Crysler.
the people wanted more youtube worldbuilding ^^
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Freshly adopted Jason, who is so used to taking care of his mother that the first morning in the manor, he wakes up in early hours to cook for Bruce, too.
Logically speaking, he understands that Bruce doesn't need it — he is a healthy adult, and they have Alfred — but it is six in the morning, and his mind is foggy, so he just follows his instincts. Maybe he does not even realise that mom is not here, after all.
Alfred finds him in the weakly dimmed kitchen when he finishes his walk around the Manor before starting with his chores. He is amused at first, stopping quietly behind the child. He is doing great (that's a surprise since Dick intentionally just stirred more trouble), and Alfred can't help but smile a little.
'Good morning, master Jason. If you are hungry, you should wake me up the next time. I promise to take care of you.'
Jason blinks owlishly, still awfully sleepy. His eyes are barely opened, his hands working on the automat.
'Breakfast,' he mumbles, frowning a little. 'For mom- I mean, for dad.'
Alfred's smile falters. His original impression shifts in a late realisation.
Oh.
'Master Jason, you shouldn't really-'
'Finished,' he yawns, putting a one — just one, nothing for himself at all — plate in front of Alfred.
It is a very simple dish, scrambled eggs with some black paper and toasted bread — but not even made in a toaster, just on the pan; this kid probably doesn't know how to use toasters. It smells nice, Alfred compliments mentally.
'Can you-' He yawns. 'Pass to-'
And then little Jason falls asleep helplessly, falling right in Alfred's arms. He catches him, of course. This boy weighs nothing at all.
'Hey, Al,' Bruce sticks his head in the kitchen, no less sleepy. 'What is going on?'
Alfred explains to Bruce what happened, and he is no less distraught. He helps him to put Jason in the bed and eats all the breakfast he prepared, with a mixture of delight and despair.
And when Jason wakes up, embarrassed by the faint memories of the early morning, Alfred puts a big plate in front of him, filled with so much food that his big blue eyes light up instantly.
'Bon appetite, master Jason,' he smiles. 'Your cooking had passed my personal standards for a cook. You are a good soldier.'
Jason giggles, his mouth already stuffed with bacon.
'That I am.'
And that he always will be.