Ok But Can We Just Acknowledge The Fact That Douxie Has Literally Been Alive Through An Unimaginable

nightwing being hurt in the field, and over comms he can’t get out what was wrong, nearly in shock, and jason puts on his best batman™️ voice and says “robin, report.”

and it snaps dick out of it enough to say concussion, possible broken ribs, and a gash in his side.

no one talks about it, and then a year later, damian does the same thing to tim

The biggest reason Cass is the only natural option as heir to The Batman comes from the fact that every other character’s growth relies on them at some point either removing themselves somewhat or completely leaving the Bat symbol behind. Cassandra is the outlier whose found a reason to live on as that same symbol.

We can argue day and night who the best vigilante, detective, fighter, hero, strategist, or whatever is but none of that changes who can survive being the symbol without losing themselves in the process of following Batman’s footsteps.

I think instead of lame excuses like "Cass is away in Honk Kong" or "[x bat] is doing stuff from his team of heroes" or just ignoring Steph's existance altogether, it would be funny if fanfics took members of the Batfam out of comission by having them have their own fanfic-related cliché adventure

Like, a Jason-centered fic where he asks Alfred where is the replacement and Alfred just goes "oh, Master Timothy has just been possesed by himself from thee-years into the future and is away trying to prevent our horrible deaths" and that's it, Tim is having his own time-travelling fix-it fic in the background which is why he's not mentioned

Babs on a Babs-centric fic where she could really use some advice asking Bruce on comms where her Batgirls are and Bruce non-chalantly answers "Steph has been hit by a love potion and Cass has offered to help her to her apartment", Babs waits a moment and comments "oh... do we get the 'congrats on kissing' banner ready for tomorrow?", "no, I think it's a slow burn, give them a week" and the rest of the fic happens without them

Dick, entering a room and finding Duke "hey, is Damian acting weird this morning or what?" "I think he said something about being stuck on a time-loop until he learns the true meaning of christmas" "aren't we on july?" "Yeah I thought so too but when I asked he mentioned he had already gotten my help on two loops so I just left him be" "well I needed help with a case, you in?" and the rest of the fic is a Dick and Duke team-up

god I fucking love strawberries

If anyone tries to reanimate Dick, he will require bath toys in his lazarus pit

I think it would be really funny if every time Dick and Jason joined missions they kind of failed upwards, even if they goofed off, or dredged up extremely personal shit, it helped with their secret identities or got them to think outside the box. There's always a disagreement on methods, someone gets kicked through a door but it's the right door and they stumble on all the evidence and the bad guys. Something that got set on fire was actually a secret message that only appeared upon heating, or they found evidence of the crime while trying to delete embarrassing CCTV footage.

the problem with reading and writing leading to a strong vocabulary is that you tend to know the vibe of words instead of their meanings.

if I used this word in a sentence, would it make sense? absolutely. if you asked me what it meant, could I tell you? absolutely not.

I believe in my heart of hearts that the Lego Batman movie exists in DC and that it was created by the batfamily as a way to throw off the conspiracy theorists

Maybe the superhero forums were getting too close to realizing their identities again. maybe one of their injuries had accidentally gotten spotted by the paparazzi. maybe they were just running out of plausible alibis. maybe they just wanted to be funny.

Bruce gave the world the "do the butts match" meme. His children give the world a cinematic masterpiece.