It's Fall. Time To Reread Temptation On The Warfront By Alizarincrims0n By Ao3

me and the girls waiting for ao3 to return from war

If you hate on Tony Stark or Iron Man you suck. You just suck. If it's constructive criticism of his character or his actions or morals that's different, but if you just hate him cause "he's selfish" or "he's not really a hero" or "he's the worst of the Avengers" then you suck. If not a hero, what is he? He didn't start off as a good guy, but he realizes what he did wrong and changes it, and he does it without completely changing who he is as a person.

Tony Stark may be selfish and an asshole, but that does not make him selfless. He literally sacrifices himself in Avengers, and its not because he thinks he can make it or because he wants attention. He just cares about everyone and the world. He has trust issues and he's worried about himself, but he's also so worried about everyone else. He cares so much for Pepper and Happy and all of the Avengers. He is just scared to express it because bad things tend to happen when he cares about people.

I understand the criticism of him in Civil War, mostly because of how he brings Peter in, but from his pov it's perfectly reasonable. He agrees to the Accords because he is full of guilt. He feels like if he and the other Avengers agree to it the world will be a safer and more just place. They'll have accountability. Honestly it makes perfect sense from a civilian point of view. I'm not saying it was the right call or that Steve was wrong, his pov was perfectly reasonable too, given his history. But then Steve left and took half of Tony's family with him. Then he sided with- for all Tony's seen- a terrorist and the very thing he's trying to stop. Then when Tony finally realizes he's in the wrong, he finds out that Bucky killed his parents (the fact that he was being controlled was irrelevant at that point) and Steve knew about it. Knew about it, talked to Tony several times, and didn't tell him. Tony reacted rashes, but he literally found out that his best friends best friend killed his parents.

The thing about Tony bringing Peter in and not telling him anything is totally reasonable. Peter was just a kid, I know Tony was desperate and that Peter was already fighting bad guys, but it was still a bad call. I do think that Peter was told more than what was shown in the movie, and that he would have agreed with Tony regardless.

Anyway, this was just a really long rant post because everyone hates on Tony or says that there was no way Civil War could be right on both sides. This is not an invitation to hate on Steve or anyone else. It's definitely understandable from both sides unless you Don't Want to see both sides.

The beginning of February, and it's 70 degrees. I fall back on it like a blessing from Apollo, knowing that when it ends I'll be more lost than before.

Merlin Playlist. Please love it

we heard that you were very disappointed in us both as a generation and specifically as a generation of women (emphasis yours), how we had let ourselves go and now we were slutty and ill-tempered and holding onto notions of feminism like "having a savings account" and "equality."

we were very sorry about it, we didn't realize. it is very hard for you, in your life, because your entire definition was centered around the word providing, and that's a really vague and undulating word. it is hard to be a provider. for your purposes, the word provider here can be defined as "having a job", although it sometimes also extends to "doing yard work", "grilling on occasion," and "knowing basic car anatomy."

we had to do some reading but we divided it out. do not worry. high-value women will fill in the rest of the gaps of your life - all those silly feminine things like doing the dishes. we didn't realize we had asked too much when we asked you to pick up after yourself. we did not realize you were rendered small and scared and crying about the possibility of doing the laundry. here is a joke to lighten the sentiment: a man that listens when you talk to him.

we heard about how we had fallen from glory and it sickened us and made us very, very sad. lindsey had to cut all her hair off and tara threw up. we lit one million candles and we are going to have a vigil about it tonight. all of the people in this world that you do not approve of are going to be there and we will all be in mourning colors because we have lost your respect which is of course the only thing that any of us were looking for.

we searched around our bedrooms and our closets and for some of us it took a while but we all found the pricetag that we were originally born with, the one that gave our listing offer, the one that smells like rot and pine needles. we were horrified because many of us had taken deductions and hadn't realized it. i had scraped my knees and decided to be a lesbian so they had to take my voicebox out so i could never call home again. janice had been with too many people overall so we had to put her into the big squisher that will hopefully collapse her walls so that when you're with her, you'll feel so big and powerful. it will be like you're conquering something instead of being close with someone.

we are all going to the funeral of feminism and we will tear at our bodies and fall over ourselves. we will invite you onstage for a live recording of your podcast about the occasional minor inconvenience of self-reflection. you will talk about how we have targeted you and made you feel the sweat slick down your back, and we will teach you basic self-defense out of solidarity.

do not worry, we are seeing to all the outliers. taylor asked to be taken seriously so we have shipped her off to prison. laura asked you to accept her femininity regardless of her presentation. you will be happy to hear all women are now and forever going to have to be small and thin and pretty and white and ablebodied and quiet and unassuming and ladylike, which is different than how society has previously told us to act.

i am going to have to shave off my jawline, which is a little masculine, and they are going to have to reshape my hands, which are very square and thick - all the work i've done with them has made their veins stand out, so we're just going to have to exsanguinate me. i am horrified to have been out in public like this.

we are going to sit around the campfire and we will talk about being weird little girls that made potions in pink teacups. we will talk about the first time we made a difference. we will talk about the private lives of crickets, and then, at the stroke of three in the morning (the witching hour, obviously) - we will all promptly shut up.

and this will be your beautiful world. this silence that spans every corner of every street and every zoom meeting and every alley. i do not think you'll notice at first - it will be the same as every television show and movie and book. we will all just simply sit there in our doll dresses and smile blithely at your advances and none of us will do you the dishonor of answering and none of us will appear to be in distress and none of us will nag you or make a fuss or get hysterical about it. it will just be quiet, and you will say finally, some peace for once! and we will smell of smoke and our teeth will be white and the next day will come.

tonight we are going to bury the last little bits of our humanity. you are not invited. it is going to be ugly.

I wish I had a best friend.

I wish I had a best friend but I can't tell anyone that because I have so many amazing friends.

But all of my amazing friends have best friends and significant others and they all have that one person who they put above everyone else and who puts them above everyone else too.

And it's not me.

And I wish I had a best friend.

No one talks about how lonely it is to be the third wheel in a friendship. Or the 11th wheel in a friend group

The people I consider myself closest to are best friends. They celebrated one of their birthdays without me.

I wished her a happy birthday and told her I missed her. She's in college, i haven't seen her since she graduated. She said she missed me too. But she didn't invite me to her party.

I wonder sometimes if my friends even like me. But then I remember that's silly. I know they love me. I guess they just don't love me as much as they love each other.

And God i know it has nothing to do with me. You can't control who you connect with. But for once I just wish it would be me!

Am I too much? Am I a pick me for wanting to be picked?

What's so wrong with wanting to be wanted?

Somebody please write this fic I'm crying that it doesn't exist! Red is Arthur and Blue is Merlin. One-shot or long fic idc! Just pleaseeeee!!! And if anyone does write it please tag me here or on Ao3! My Ao3 is Actually_Icarus

Please and thank you!!!

How many times do you think Merlin brought in breakfast for Arthur just to find an empty room and a cold bed? How many times did he stumble out of bed in the morning, going to the kitchens without a thought while the cook let him take food became she couldn't bare reminding him? How many times do you think Merlin went to go clean Arthur's room only to find it unchanged since he last entered? How many times do you think Gwen found him there after she switched rooms because she couldn't bare to be there, but when she passed by Merlin always was? How many times did Merlin light a fire or wait at the desk for Arthur, trying to forget that he wouldn't be in that room ever again?

My favorite thing about art is that everyone takes something different out of it! Oh you like this song? This is what it means to you? Well this what it means to me. You see these two characters together? I see these two. We both love this thing so much and took such different things from it! Isn't that cool!? Isn't awesome the we see the same things and we love them differently! Then we take what we see and what we love from it and make new art! And the cycle continues! I love art and I love humanity!

Thinking about this again. When I'm angry he should be angry.

I need more angry Merlin! I need Merlin to accidentally reveal his magic, expecting Arthur to lash out and feel betrayed. I need Arthur to tell Merlin he knew the whole time. I need Merlin to pause, to process what he just said. I need Merlin to realize what he's sacrificed to keep his secret while Arthur let him. I need Merlin to be the one to lash out and tell him this. I need Merlin to be the one to feel betrayed. Arthur knew and he let Merlin continue to lie to him and believe that Arthur hated him. Arthur didn't tell him he knew all in the name of "trust" and "letting Merlin decide when it was best to tell him". I need Merlin to break down at this. How could Arthur not realize how much it hurt Merlin to lie!? How could he be okay with the betrayal while not processing the consequences of that betrayal!? For a good cause or not!? I need Merlin to scream.