Reblog And Put In The Tags What You Think Will Fix You

I thought this said 'FLESH STEALS'

I decided to play 'Fountains of Decay' in the car today and my mom called it 'a bunch of angry snarling'

I also played 'Every Snowflake Is Different' and I swear to fuck my mom looked fucking like this:

I got bored and made a pick-up line

'They say nobodies perfect, are you nobody? Cause your perfect

My sister is bad at naming things

we had a possum in our backyard once and we were going to name it so my sister said "Possy" no we didn't name him that his name was bob. She also tried to name one of the feral cats that roams the alley (An orange tabby) "Orangey" I named him cheez-it. We also had another feral who was a tortoise shell cat (A tortie for short) and she named her "Afri" because, and this is a direct quote, 'Her spots reminded me of Africa.' The name stuck. Anyways we almost named a possum Pussy.

Both of my cats are named after Beatles songs

Me to literally any friendship Barbie has with any other girl: 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈

Y’all so my school has this thing called ‘Today in History’ that the oldest kids do and my class was getting our information and writing scripts for next year (when we do it) and my friend got March 1st so instead of doing Justin Bieber I asked her to do Lupita Nyong’o and she said she would and she is putting Lupita’s birthday instead of Justin Beavers

Don’t you hate it when you forget to take your medicine that’s supposed to help you not forget to take it? - my dad after asking me why i didn’t ask to take an immediate release (A version of my ADHD meds) and I said “Oh! I forgot about them!”

We’re learning about genes in science class and an ad for something with Patrick Stewart came on and everyone was like ‘Wasn’t he Professor X?” X-genes.